How to recognize and recover from everyday sociopaths - narcissists

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Sandusky and church verdicts put institutions on notice

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On Friday, June 22, 2012, the verdicts were announced in two important child molestation trials that had been going on simultaneously in Pennsylvania: Jerry Sandusky, the former assistant football coach of Penn State University, was convicted of 45 of the 48 child molestation charges against him. And, Monsignor William J. Lynn was found guilty of essentially contributing to a cover-up of sexual predators among Catholic priests in the archdiocese of Philadelphia. The priests had been molesting children for years. Lynn was the first high-ranking church official to be prosecuted for failing to protect children. The Philadelphia Inquirer has reported on both of these cases extensively. You …

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We are valuable, and the psychopath can’t take that value

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By Joyce Alexander, RNP (retired) One of my cousins, a lovely lady in her early 80s, who still has every marble she ever had and a heart as big as a wash tub, sent me the following story in an e mail. I had heard the story years ago, but hadn't read it in a long time, but today when I read it, I thought about how the psychopathic experience makes this a very valuable analogy. A well-known speaker started off his seminar holding up a $20 bill. In the room of 200, he asked, "Who would like this $20 bill?" Hands started going up. He said, "I am going to give this $20 to one of you but first, let me do this." He ”¦ proceeded to crumple up the $20 dollar bill. He then asked, "Who still wants i …

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LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: Can you help a woman who is trying to hold on?

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Editor's note: I received this email a few days ago from a Lovefraud reader, whom we'll call "Larissa." At first I declined to publish it, because Larissa is raw with pain, to the point of seriously considering suicide, and I was afraid that it would trigger other readers. She said she was going to a hospital for help, if she could find someone to watch her dogs. Well, she found a dog-sitter. She went to the hospital. The hospital sent her home, telling her to see a psychiatrist. This woman is in need of support. She needs to be heard. She needs to be understood. Therefore, I am publishing her letter. If you are raw with pain yourself, it is probably best that you don't read it. But if …

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Finding the pieces of my soul

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Editor's note: The following article was written by the Lovefraud reader who posts as "Adelade." She previously wrote, "Lessons from Jurassic Park: Sociopaths simply are." When I first realized that my marriage was over, I was literally overwhelmed with the ensuing emotions that followed my initial discovery. After the exspath left and I had an opportunity to do some in-depth financial research, the emotions centered around fear and despair. Fear with regard to my immediate and foreseeable future, and despair with regard to the gravity of the obvious marriage-for-money-only. I've been grappling with fear and despair for a good while, now. Sometimes, I have fits of one (or, both) that …

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Reclaiming Our Power – One Decision At A Time

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Thank you for your continuing comments after my posts. I feel deeply honoured to be here, and I am so glad that my stories seem to help in some way - it makes all the bad experiences worthwhile! As each new week arrives, and the time comes to writing an article, I look back and search for something that has hit home in some way shape or form. Something that has made a difference to me and that, therefore, I hope will be of value to my friends here on Lovefraud. This week there have been a couple of things — a photograph that a friend sent to me was one of them. It was one of those quotes that tends to do the rounds on social media sites. One with a photograph and a motivational or p …

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Andrew Funches AKA Ty Fortner scams 18 women, yet no one will prosecute

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He pleaded that he needed cash—fast—because "Fat Tony" from the Chicago mob was after him to repay a gambling debt. Four different women fell for that story, and others believed they were investing in his insurance business. They all lost their money—possibly $250,000 all together. Meet Andrew Funches, AKA Ty Fortner, AKA Drew Fortner, AKA Logan Zander—the newest case study on Lovefraud.com. Read: With multiple aliases but the same scam, Andrew Funches swindles more than 10 women Victims started seeking each other out via the Internet, and eventually found as many as 18 women who'd been swindled by the same con artist. Ten women are named in official records—lawsuits and Funches' ban …

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Histrionic personality disorder

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Defense attorneys for Jerry Sandusky, the former assistant football coach at Penn State who is accused of molesting 10 boys, may argue that the man suffers from histrionic personality disorder. So what is it? Lovefraud readers sent links to articles that explain: What is histrionic personality disorder? on CNN.com. What is histrionic personality disorder? on Health.Yahoo.net. …

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Taking care of ourselves–FIRST!

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By Joyce Alexander, RNP (retired) Wearing my “nurse Joyce hat” is part of what I am, although I am retired. Even though I am no longer in practice giving out specific medical advice to patients and billing insurance companies, Medicare and private payers for the advice, I still am inclined to look at things from a medical point of view. One of the things I used to teach my diabetic patients about their condition was that I was the “coach” and they were the “team.” I could not get out on the field of life and play the “game” they had to do it. But if I were not a good “coach,” and didn't teach them the “rules of the game,” they were not going to be able to play a good game. I told them t …

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Stolen Time

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By:  Linda Hartoonian Almas, M.S. Ed Last year, I re-connected via social media, with a childhood friend who I had not seen in years.  As mothers with children of similar ages, we had a lot to catch up on.  As we did, I learned that she has two children who are suffering from a misunderstood and often misdiagnosed disorder. She is a wonderfully positive person, who freely discusses her children's struggles, in hopes of educating others about the issue.  She advocates fiercely for them, yet seems to successfully strike a balance between speaking on their behalf and encouraging their independence. The same, only different Over time, as I learned more, I found that I identified with …

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Red Flags of Love Fraud: The best book for spotting the socially sick

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Donna Andersen determined through surveys and her knowledge of people that the term “sociopath” should be revived and used to describe those who (irrespective of their official psychiatric diagnosis) have adopted a predatory or parasitic lifestyle. In taking this bold step, Donna has filled the void created by my colleagues in Academics and the American Psychiatric Association who can't seem to agree on how to name and define this group. These are people who are called by many names in popular psychology books including: psychopath, narcissist, antisocial, and borderline. The word sociopath tells us what many with these diagnoses are socially sick. The person on the street need not care ab …

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