How to recognize and recover from everyday sociopaths - narcissists

Man ‘can’t afford’ $38 million divorce settlement, but spends millions on new wife

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Ashley Kozel says her ex-husband, former Gulf Keystone Petroleum CEO Todd Kozel, 48, hasn't paid their $38 million divorce settlement. In a lawsuit, she says Todd Kozel "uses a sophisticated chain of offshore entities to shield his assets from the reach of creditors, such as his former wife." Ashley Kozel accuses her ex of spending thousands of dollars on clothes and vacations for his new wife, a 29-year-old blonde from Lithuania. A judge has just granted Ashley Kozel access to her ex-husband's $12.7 million Manhattan apartment. 'My ex is showering his new wife with my money!', on NYPost.com. Socialite sues for Chelsea pad after playboy ex 'refuses' to pay $38 million settlement, on …

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Been to counseling because of abuse? Fill out the Therapy Satisfaction Survey – closing soon!

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If you sought professional counseling because of an involvement with someone who may be disordered, Lovefraud wants to know about your experience. Working with Dr. Liane Leedom and the University of Bridgeport, we are gathering data for scientific research about the therapeutic experience of those who sought therapy in the context of an abusive relationship. The survey is completely anonymous no personal information is collected at all. What did you experience? Did the therapist understand what you were talking about? Did he or she help you realize what you were dealing with? Or was the counselor completely clueless about personality disorders? Did the person make you feel worse instead of …

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Living in Secret with the Sociopath

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Are Things Really What We Think They Are? Things aren't always what they seem, that's for sure. And sometimes things aren't always what they seem when they are right in your face. People can't really be persuaded, even if something is right in their face. For whatever their reasons are, people have to come to their own conclusions about things. And most of the time it's difficult for family and friends to watch someone they love continue in a path that is harmful to them. Living In Secret Those of us who fall into the victim category, well, we live in secret. We live in secret about what is really going on for a lot of reasons. We are in denial of our own circumstances even though we know …

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Is It Really My Fault? A Victim Fights Back Against Victim-Blame

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Chapter Six I Wouldn't Let That Happen It's your fault for letting yourself get hurt. Just reading that sentence probably makes you agitated. But people say that about each other all the time. We blame victims for letting themselves get hurt. Now maybe you want to say, “NO I DON'T.” It's offensive, right? We all want to be the kind of person who shows up with band-aids and soup and enough time to really listen and care about what happened. That's because we're decent people, and we do care. But think for a moment about how we respond differently to the kind of hurt that takes a band-aid and that we can see maybe happening to us and the kind of hurt that we never, ever want to touch our …

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Warning: Sociopath Ahead!

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A friend of mine feared her daughter was involved with a sociopath who was pressuring her to have children with him. Knowing I'd had my life derailed by my own husband (now ex-husband), who I now believe is a sociopath, my friend asked me to tell her daughter some of my story. As one never knows if a seed of information will later blossom into insight, I wrote her daughter a letter.  The entry below is based on that letter. Wonderful Qualities Become Profound Vulnerabilities I believe my ex-husband and the father of my children has a personality disorder—narcissistic personality disorder—some refer to such individuals as sociopaths or psychopaths. Such people are more common that most of us …

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Parents try to frame PTA president by planting drugs in her car

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In this unbelievable story, the parents of a middle school boy, both of them lawyers, went out of their way to destroy the PTA president over a misinterpreted comment. First Jill and Kent Easter, of Irvine, California, tried to get the PTA president fired from her volunteer job. When that didn't work, they threatened a lawsuit. And when that didn't work, they planted drugs in her car. The Easters were caught and convicted. Then the PTA president, Kelli Peters, filed a lawsuit against them. She just won a $5.7 million judgment. Who planted drugs in the PTA mom's car? Upscale parents, and for petty reasons, on WashingtonPost.com. Story submitted by a Lovefraud reader. …

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Wisconsin sociopath convinced woman to plant hidden cameras in women’s locker rooms

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Two years ago, Christina Walker and her 10-year-old daughter uncovered what turned out to be a massive spy cam operation in Pleasant Prairie, Wisconsin. Karl Landt persuaded his co-worker,  Melissa Wenckebach, to plant the spy cams in the women's locker room at their employee recreation center. Then, Landt convinced Wenckebach to do the same thing at a community swim club. She placed the cameras and retrieved them hundreds of times. The two are now in prison. But this recent report, about a law that Christina Walker is advocating for to protect children, includes Wenckebach tearfully describing Landt's sick manipulation tactics. "I was videotaped in my locker room:" Pre-teen pleads for …

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With sociopaths, words and actions can both be lies

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Lovefraud received the following observation from a reader who posts as "new_day": I just had an A-ha moment while scrolling through Facebook. I read a post that said, "Words may lie but actions always tell the truth." The problem with understanding how sociopathic behavior is so damaging to others, is that we have to realize even Actions can Lie!! Those who are hollow of any truth or love are masters of acting! They can entertain us into thinking they are the good and loving soul mate that we were blessed to meet. In reality, it was all love fraud. Somehow, I am expected to move forward with the inability to trust another person's actions again. This is a very astute observation. Anyone …

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Woman fakes cancer to raise money – is she a do-gooder, or a sociopath?

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Editor's note: The following story and comment were sent by a Lovefraud reader whom we'll call "Jeri-Lynn." A well-known woman from West Seattle, Tracy Dart, claimed she battled cancer three times while raising money for the disease. Allegations are that she never had cancer at all. Local woman may have faked cancer diagnosis, on King5.com. This a story from my community, which is reeling from the news. Are daily lies which do "good" things like raise $ for cancer research somehow "better" than lies perpetuated by sociopaths to actively hurt their targets? I suspect her family and friends are hurting equally - just all at once instead of slowly over time. I've been reading some of the …

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