Donna Andersen, Author at Lovefraud | Escape sociopaths - narcissists in relationships

Fotis Dulos, charged in wife’s murder, dead after suicide attempt

January 30, 2020 // by Donna Andersen// 4 Comments

UPDATE for 2020 Fotis Dulos, charged with kidnapping and murder in his wife's disappearance, has died. He had been in critical condition due to carbon monoxide poisoning after an apparent suicide attempt. Read the article: Fotis Dulos, Connecticut man charged in wife Jennifer Dulos' murder, dead after suicide attempt, lawyer says, on Foxnews.com. Original Lovefraud story — June 5, 2019: Jennifer Dulos disappearance: Warning signs in the custody battle Jennifer Dulos, a mother of five from New Canaan, Connecticut, has been missing since May 24, 2019. Since her blood was on clothing and sponges found in 30 garbage bags that her estranged husband, Fotis Dulos, was a …

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Criminal profilers discuss the Chris Watts murders

January 24, 2020 // by Donna Andersen// 11 Comments

UPDATED FOR 2020 https://youtu.be/s1qORsx8veo Mary Ann Glynn, who is a Lovefraud webinar presenter, recently appeared on a panel of criminal profilers to discuss the Chris Watts murders. Watts' wife and two young daughters disappeared on August 13, 2018. Two days later, Watts was arrested and subsequently confessed to murdering them all. In this video, Mary Ann Glynn explains why she believes Watts is disordered, and what motivated his actions. Here is Lovefraud's original coverage of the story: Is Chris Watts, who killed his pregnant wife and kids, a sociopath? When his wife and daughters were missing in August, Chris Watts pleaded for their safe return. Then the …

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3 self-care steps to begin your recovery from narcissistic abuse

January 17, 2020 // by Donna Andersen// 7 Comments

If you have tangled with anyone who has an exploitative and manipulative personality disorder, you have endured narcissistic abuse. What, exactly, does that mean? Good question. "Narcissistic abuse" is not an official term listed in the bible of mental health, which is the DSM-5 (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of the American Psychiatric Association). If you Google the term, you'll find the circular definition that narcissistic abuse is abuse inflicted by a narcissist. Mental health officialdom does not seem to have a good understanding of how these disordered individuals behave in romantic, family or other relationships. So looking for answers, we, the targets, have turned to the …

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Video: Mandy Friedman, LPCC, on Self-Care for Survivors

January 6, 2020 // by Donna Andersen// Leave a Comment

https://youtu.be/qRH9C6E2w4g If you feel confused, shocked and devastated during, or after, a relationship with a sociopath — according to Mandy Friedman, LPCC, you feel exactly like most victims. You may also feel angry, heartbroken, and like your entire self-concept has been shattered. Now what? How do you rebuild yourself? A critical step, Mandy says, is self-care. That's exactly what she will teach you in her upcoming webinar. For more information, and to sign up, go to the link below. Mandy will give her presentation, and then answer your questions. Self-Care for Survivors Presented by Mandy Friedman, LPCC, CCDVC Thursday, January 23, 8 - 9 pm ET • $25 More info …

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Sociopathic seduction: As long as it takes

January 6, 2020 // by Donna Andersen// 29 Comments

UPDATED FOR 2019 I confess. I am one of those people who fell for the sociopathic seduction. I was swept up in the excitement, sex and love bombing by the sociopath and committed to the relationship far too quickly. James Montgomery proposed to me four days after we met in person. I said yes. I sometimes excuse myself by explaining that we'd been corresponding via e-mail for about a month after meeting online, so it wasn't like I only knew him for four days. But then, of course, a month isn't very long either. I take some comfort in the fact that I am certainly not alone. Many, many people describe the beginning of their relationship with a sociopath as a "whirlwind romance." In …

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How childhood pain leads to involvements with sociopaths

December 19, 2019 // by Donna Andersen// 70 Comments

Updated for 2019 Lovefraud recently received this letter from a woman whom we'll call "Nina." I'm posting Nina's story because many Lovefraud readers have told me of similar patterns in their lives. I love this man like I've never loved before. He seemed to be my soul mate. I have had two failed marriages (no sex in them). I was touched by a neighbour starting when I was 10 and it continued for eight years. My father was totally controlling and I was not allowed friends or to go anywhere except to this neighbour. Both were depressed parents and did not show affection, only criticism. I have always felt alone but now am — parents dead, sister dead within last four years. I …

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On Thanksgiving 2019, the energy of gratitude

November 28, 2019 // by Donna Andersen// 11 Comments

One of the most healing energies of the universe is gratitude. No matter what your situation, finding something to be grateful for can help you move forward. This may seem difficult, especially if you've recently discovered that you've been betrayed by a sociopath. But even under these circumstances, you can be grateful that you have finally learned the truth. My own experience with a sociopath was shattering. But one thing that was demolished was the wall I had built around myself. With that gone, I was able to move forward and find true love and companionship, and for that I am grateful. To all Lovefraud readers, thank you for your contributions to our collective …

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Video: To parents who must send their kids to spend time with a disordered ex

November 11, 2019 // by Donna Andersen// 1 Comment

You left your partner because he or she is disordered. Unfortunately, you have kids together. So now, you must co-parent and send the kids to spend time with your ex — alone. Knowing the sociopath's abusive personality, you worry. And you wonder — what can you do to help them? Claudia Paradise, LCSW-R, a psychotherapist in New York City, helps parents like you all the time. So now, she is sharing her knowledge and experience with all Lovefraud parents who are in this situation in her upcoming webinar: Empowering the child who must spend time alone with a disordered parent Wednesday, November 20, 2019 • 7 to 9 pm ET • $50 Instructor: Claudia Paradise, LCSW-R This course wi …

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Why you can become addicted to a sociopath

September 23, 2019 // by Donna Andersen// 134 Comments

Updated for 2019 Lovefraud received the following email from a reader: Why can't I get past this jerk? Why do I feel like there is something wrong with me? You see he dumped me for a female version of himself, i.e., drug dealer, liar, manipulator, violent — and he is stringing me along bad mouthing her to me and vice versa. Never in a million years would I think I would even associate myself with someone like that! Yet I'm beating myself up - why not me?? I should be grateful!! Why am I still pining for this creep? Many, many Lovefraud readers have described the same confusion: I realize now that the person is a sociopath. I know he betrayed me. I know he is bad for me. But I still love …

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Is he a sociopath or am I the toxic person?

September 19, 2019 // by Donna Andersen// 1 Comment

Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call "Carolina." I am completely confused about what actually happened and what is going on. I recently broke up with my boyfriend — we have been on and off for the past 18 years — I met him when I was 10 years old. He made me think he was the perfect man. And that he was loyal honest trustworthy sincere caring my soul mate. I'm not a perfect person — I have made mistakes — but he always made me feel secure. I was really dependent on him — he was my whole world. I've always tried to self-evaluate and fix my behavior and I've always been open about talking to him about everything and anything and I thought he …

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sept4 on Am I a sociopath magnet?: “Not me, I am one and done! My sociopath ex husband wrecked my life and I have never wanted to…”
sept4 on My psychopathic ex-husband is dead, and his pedophile brother is in prison: “Thank you Donna for sharing. My sociopath ex husband is a convicted criminal and continued his criminal activity after a…”