Lovefraud Reader, Author at Lovefraud | Escape sociopaths - narcissists in relationships

Letter to Lovefraud: I took him back only to be discarded again

August 18, 2016 // by Lovefraud Reader// 17 Comments

Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following email from a reader whom we'll call "Caitlyn." Read her original story: "I should feel lucky to be free of the sociopath, but it's tearing me up!" You posted my first story and I now have another one. Just couldn't get him off my mind and I took him back only to be discarded again despite my healing. I am very embarrassed and disappointed in myself today, but it may help someone think twice. My story is as follows: Well I did it again. Allowed him back in despite my progress towards healing. This makes the third time. It lasted 2 months and I was discarded again yesterday. Somehow I think my body knew this would happen as I've had panic …

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We lost our daughter to a mind-controlling Internet predator

August 13, 2016 // by Lovefraud Reader// 1 Comment

Though I am one parent, I am easily the voice of all the parents and families who are living with the horrors of Internet luring of our innocent children for the purpose of human trafficking. The issue is real and our painful journey through this with our only daughter has clearly heightened our awareness of what we have been told is the newest form of “cult like” persuasive coercion, luring, grooming and human trafficking which began with a deliberate and meticulous indoctrination into the world of pornography through an online video game. Our lives have been forever changed. As with anything that can be beneficial, the Internet can also be dangerous. The Internet is the key that opens the …

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I was desperate for closure, revenge and for the truth to get out

August 5, 2016 // by Lovefraud Reader// 9 Comments

Lovefraud received the following letter from a reader who posts as, "lucky2Bfree." Donna, We spoke a while ago and it really did help me, it was good to speak to somebody who genuinely understood how I felt and also get some perspective on the situation. To recap, my fiance borrowed a lot of money for me and told me stories which I now know to be false. We were living together in the United States, but when I returned to my native country to nurse my terminally ill mother he told me he needed to leave America and wanted to join me. He borrowed more money, told me he was falsely arrested and needed me to pay the bail bond but suddenly went quiet, leading me to believe something awful had …

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The Recovery Poem – ‘I could not care less’

July 30, 2016 // by Lovefraud Reader// 1 Comment

Editor's note: This poem of recovery was written by Lovefraud reader, Arpinsandie. (To clarify the first line, a "6th form pupil" is a British term roughly equivalent to a high school student.) By Arpinsandie You cheated on your first wife with a 6th form pupil and groomed pupils You lost your family because of your behaviour You blamed your wife Your second wife found real love through your abhorrent lies anger rage and dominance You blamed her The 3rd - long term partner - Me You tried to control destroy by lying cheating verbally assaulting bullying a classic case of narcissistic behaviour I dumped you You will blame me But then be proud you are an A1 sociopathic robot Who has lost …

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My life Living with a Sociopath (5 Years Wasted)

July 22, 2016 // by Lovefraud Reader// 12 Comments

My husband on the outside — the man everyone else sees: - The nicest person you could ever meet - Positive, Non-Confrontational, High Energy, Bubbly Personality - Will bend over backwards to do anything to help anyone - He is everyone's best friend - He will cook for you or will clean dishes if you cook for him ”¦ and always offers a helping hand - Very attentive - Very loving - Will serve you coffee in bed every morning and maybe breakfast too! - The kindest and biggest gentleman you think you have ever met - Will always tell you how beautiful you are everyday - He will take very good care of you financially - He is always concerned for everyone's well being - He is an e …

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I wish I would have known sooner that people like this existed

July 16, 2016 // by Lovefraud Reader// 3 Comments

Editor's note: A Lovefraud reader who posts as "Zenagirl10" sent the following story. I have had 5 years experience with a sociopath. It started out my ex was dating a friend of mine and they were engaged to be married. They broke up and she moved away. Then he set his sights on me. Initially I was not interested in him at all. But I thought he wants to buy all these things for me and at the time I could only afford the necessities. So I continued with the relationship. Everything moved so quickly, he was constantly texting, phoning and wanting to be by my side 24-7. I was like wow, he must really be in love with me. There were several red flags that I did not notice and I wish I …

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My ex has custody of our daughter, even though he pleaded guilty to domestic violence

July 6, 2016 // by Lovefraud Reader// 17 Comments

Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call "Cassidy." I was married for 2 years. The problems emerged after my daughter was born. Jumping to the end of the story, we separated and divorced. We had final court orders for parenting and property in 2010. Since then I have been back to court at least 20 times, we have 3 final orders. My ex now has custody of my daughter, even though he was accused of domestic violence and pleaded guilty to the charges. In Australia the presumption for shared care is set aside if you can prove this. I was given custody of my little girl the first and second court cases. He was given sole parenting on the third. Needless to …

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Recovery from a sociopath through poetry

June 11, 2016 // by Lovefraud Reader// Leave a Comment

Editors note: A Lovefraud reader whom we'll call "arpinsandie" says that writing poetry helped her recover from an involvement with a sociopath. She shares some of what she wrote, in the hope that it will help others as well. Poem for the Heart Emotion Conscience Less Do you know what hate is No Do you know what it is to be hated No Do you know where hate fits No Where warm humans love Hate is in you Where softness and kindness live You cultivate destruction Why do people cry They are hurt broken bt you Your charm superficial Boredom reigns where love should be A wonderful man to all outside see The real you ? - Only I see Cos you cant You don't hurt Cos you cant You don't love Cos you …

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After enduring his cruelty and exploitation, finally finding the truth

May 18, 2016 // by Lovefraud Reader// 10 Comments

Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call "Laurette." In 2014, I met a man while visiting Calgary, Canada. He was loving, sweet, charming and said everything I wanted to hear. Everything but the truth. He was an alcoholic and determined to change his life. I admired him for that. He told me he had a child to a woman who he met at a party/bar and purposely got him drunk so she could get pregnant. It was a one-night stand. Six months after his daughter was born, she ran off without any notice and not telling him where she'd taken their daughter. I fell pregnant to him almost straight away, which was a miracle because I had fertility issues which I'd …

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After the discard, I discovered everything I thought I knew about him was a lie

May 11, 2016 // by Lovefraud Reader// 16 Comments

Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a man whom we'll call "Evan." We were together for four years. He discarded me out of the blue one day for someone he had known 2 weeks. It wasn't until after the discard I discovered that everything I had thought I knew about him was a lie. I also found out he had been cheating on me, with God knows how many people, our entire relationship. At last count, I could confirm 10. I cannot confirm that any of the individuals he cheated on me with were female, but I heard stories and have my suspicions. I do know for certain he attempted a sexual encounter with our good friend and neighbor, who is a married female, but aside from that, I …

After the discard, I discovered everything I thought I knew about him was a lieRead More

jhmb6 on Narcissists and hoarding disorder: “This article suggests that all narcissists are not simply narcissists. There always seems to be a co-occurring disorder. All evidence…”
Joanie Bentz, B.S., M.ED, LBS, CCBP on Narcissists and hoarding disorder: “Happy Sunday Donna, and I am not surprised based on the story of your ex that he may have been…”
Donna Andersen on Narcissists and hoarding disorder: “Hi Joanie — thanks for this article! My ex was a complete pack rat. I converted my basement into an…”
Donna Andersen on When bad behavior shows symptoms, not flaws : “Emilie 18 posted the following comment in the Forum. Eleanor Cowen posted a beautifully said piece in the Blog about…”
Donna Andersen on More evidence that psychopaths do not ‘burn out’: “Hi Samson75 – My paper was peer-reviewed and published in the International Journal of Offender Therapy and Comparative Criminology. There’s…”