In a recent article in the New York Times, Scott O. Lilienfeld (president of the Society for the Scientific Study of Psychopathy) and Ashley L. Watts discussed their research into presidential narcissism and success in office. They estimated the narcissism levels of all United States presidents, up to George W. Bush. The two highest scorers on "grandiose narcissism" were Theodore Roosevelt and Lyndon B. Johnson.They correlated presidential narcissism with surveys of presidential performance developed by historians. The result of the study: "Grandiose narcissism" was associated with overall presidential success, but also with unethical behaviors. The Narcissist in Chief, on NYTimes.com. Link …
Two Legged Snakes – explaining manipulative people with outrageous cartoons
They say picture is worth 1,000 words. The 91 cartoons in Dr. Ed Slack's slender book, Two-legged snakes understanding and handling manipulative people, communicate the essence of sociopaths, narcissists, and other exploiters. The pictures will plant an understanding of disordered people firmly in your brain: They are snakes. In fact, deceptive and manipulative people have been known as snakes for millennia. Dr. Slack points out that the original deceiver, according to Christian, Jewish and Islamic traditions, was the serpent in the Garden of Eden, who tempted Eve to eat the forbidden fruit. He says this Bible story "highlights one of our most important tasks as human beings: to choose well …
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Pathological Liars are Sociopaths, Sociopaths are Pathological Liars
Lies and Cheats I think to myself in retrospect of all the occurrences where the SP was telling a COMPLETE lie. Of course, at the time, I knew something wasn't right, but I wanted him to make it right. I wanted him to prove to me what he was really saying was true, which he never did. For a very long time I did not want to believe he was cheating...that much. I couldn't fathom it. But he was. Surprise Visit I went to teach dance every Thursday evening and he came home from our office early so I could beat the traffic. 9 times out of 10 he was late, so I eventually had to tell him the schedule at work had changed to earlier, so when he was late, I would still be on time. One day I decide …
Pathological Liars are Sociopaths, Sociopaths are Pathological LiarsRead More
LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: I lost my marriage, my children, my job and my home
Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following email from a woman who calls herself “Crazy Ex-Girlfriend.” My story began in high school where we started dating. We were both at the end of our junior year and began dating as summer was beginning. It started off fantastic; I mean that's why I stayed to get back those first few weeks of our relationship. Then the jealously started, the manipulations, the isolation: it was too much for me to take and begin my college years. So I told him we were done; of course this was after he "tried to commit suicide" in front of me by taking a handful of aspirin; he pinned me down in my car in the dorm parking lot and I screamed to the point that someone ca …
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History buff believes Philadelphia serial killer may have been Jack the Ripper
H. H. Holmes killed at least 27 people and possibly many more before he was hanged in a Philadelphia prison in 1896, according to a story in the Philadelphia Inquirer. Before coming to Philadelphia, Holmes built a hotel in Chicago now known as "The Murder Castle." It was equipped with secret tunnels and staircases, gas chambers and more devices for torture and death. Mark Potts, a history buff from Berks County, Pennsylvania, speculates that Holmes may have also been "Jack the Ripper," who murdered five prostitutes in London in 1888. Was Phila. killer Jack the Ripper? on Philly.com. …
History buff believes Philadelphia serial killer may have been Jack the RipperRead More
Pets and recovery from sociopaths
For the first time in 12 years, we've had a dog in the house. Terry and I have been watching our nephew's dog while he and his parents are on vacation. The dog, Cade, is a frisky 15-month-old mix. I don't know what breeds are in the mix, but Cade looks a lot like Beau, the dog I had while married to the sociopath and the dog who kept me company as I recovered from my ex-husband's destruction. I've been having flashbacks. Cade follows me around the house the way Beau did. He curls up in the same spots on the carpet that Beau liked. And he gets in the same kind of trouble that Beau did when he was young. I'm loving every minute of it (okay, I could do with a little less chewing). Cade …
How to protect yourself online
The Internet is now an integral part of our lives, so it's important to know how to protect ourselves online. The U.S.government has created a great website, OnGuardOnline.gov, with all kinds of information on exactly how to do that. Lovefraud strongly recommends that you take a look at it watch the videos and read some articles with great tips for staying safe. Here are a few good ones: Common online scams Computer security Using IP cameras safely Resource provided by a Lovefraud reader …
Maintaining No Contact with a Sociopath
Boundaries? I Don't Know What Those Are It's amazing how even after years and months go by of you making it perfectly clear what kind of contact you want with the sociopath, they don't reciprocate your boundaries. I think it's just mind boggling over and over again in my mind that this concept of boundaries is so foreign to them, and they have no means, let alone intentions, of adhering to them. I mean normal people who find out other people don't want them to contact them anymore, just...stop. But the sociopath does the exact opposite. They continue to push buttons, push boundaries, push limits. There is a constant alertness on the part of the person that set up the boundaries against t …
LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: The ride on the sociocrazytrain was painful, but I don’t regret it
Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following email from a reader whom we'll call Roseann. I just wanted to thank you for developing the Lovefraud site, sharing your experience and writing your books. I have read both. The books and your site have helped me tremendously, not only initially when I needed to understand what was happening, during the no contact time and even now, when he's long gone. It helps me to remember who I was back then and to see whom I am now and I'm pleased with my progress and the choices I made. Cutting contact All in all, I spent the better part of 10 years dealing with my on and off relationship/friendship with my spath and THE best thing I did was cut …
LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: The ride on the sociocrazytrain was painful, but I don’t regret itRead More
Machiavellian brains light up with the opportunity to exploit others
It's called the Dark Triad narcissism, psychopathy and Machiavellianism. You definitely want to avoid people who have these traits and personality disorders. Machiavellianism is a term used to describe those who manipulate and deceive to get their way. A recent study shows that these traits are hardwired into the brains of people who act this way. The study was conducted by researchers at the University of Pecs in Hungary. They tested the research subjects for Machiavellianism, and divided them into "high Mach" and "low Mach" groups. Then they used fMRI machines to observe the subjects' brains while they played a "trust game." The "high Machs" showed higher neural activity when their partner …
Machiavellian brains light up with the opportunity to exploit othersRead More
