How to recognize and recover from everyday sociopaths - narcissists

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Marriage to the narcissist was bad, but divorcing him was worse

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Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call “Mary-Louise.” I was married for 9 years to a man who is a malignant narcissist, very similar to a sociopath. I have 2 kids and we share legal custody. I thought being married to him was bad, but divorcing him is worse in a lot of ways. He had a sex and gambling addiction. He works as a fitness coach for adults and loved the automatic authority that gave him. He took full advantage of the women clients and had affairs with many of them. This was unknown to me until we separated. There were several women he had on-going affairs with over the course of 10 years. Regularly he would invite his fitness clients over to our house f …

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What makes a psychopath, and why they don’t change

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America's attention in recent weeks was focused on the Hollywood-worthy escape from prison by two convicted murderers Richard Matt and David Sweat. Matt is now dead. Sweat was shot, captured, and is now under guard at the Albany Medical Center in Albany, New York. The media have referred to both of these men a psychopaths. Looking at their crimes, I agree. Sweat was convicted of murdering Kevin Tarsia, Broome County Sheriff's Deputy, in 2002. But he didn't just shoot the sheriff. Sweat ambushed Tarsia in a town park, shot him multiple times and then ran him over with a car. Here's the story: David Sweat's brutal path to prison, on PressConnects.com. Richard Matt had a lifelong history …

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Alleged Charleston murderer Dylann Storm Roof: Perhaps a budding sociopath who never had a chance

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On the evening of June 17, 2015, Dylann Storm Roof sat in a Bible study group at the Emanuel African Methodist Episcopal Church, in Charleston, South Carolina, for 45 minutes. Then he pulled out a Glock .45 handgun and shot 10 people, killing nine of them. All of the victims were African-American. One was the pastor of the church and a state senator, Rev. Clementa Pinckney. Two others were also pastors. Six of the victims were women; three were men. Fourteen hours later, Roof, 21, of Eastover, South Carolina, was arrested and charged with the murders. Many people, from politicians to celebrities to men and women on the street, are decrying the mass killing as an indication of …

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LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: The Aftermath – The fight against the sociopath is 90% over

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The Lovefraud reader who posts as “Winifred” has written about dealing with her husband's sociopathic ex-wife. Read “The Other Prey loving someone previously married to a sociopath” and “Survival tips when the ex is a sociopath.” My husband's ex sociopath wife and their 2 (now adult) children have been the focus of many of my writings to you and this site. I title this article "The Aftermath" because his youngest of the 2 children with her has just been emancipated at 19 by the state of Indiana, Thank God! We are still facing 3 more years of college dealings with his ex, but the difficult, emotionally, mentally and physically tolling part is over ”¦ we hope! My husband and I are now finding …

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The chess game called divorce: Financials with a sociopath, Part 4 of 5

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Part of a Now 5 Week Series: Week 1:  Running a Business with a Sociopath Week 2:  The Downfall of a Business with a Sociopath Week 3: Preparing for Divorce Week 4: Divorce and Aftermath Part A Week 5:  Divorce and Aftermath Part B   Divorce and Aftermath Part A Writing this I feel like I am only writing general statements about what happened.  The amount of upheaval that came with each situation and the time and effort it took to even get to these occurrences was insane.  I remember spending 8 straight hours compiling evidence and documentation and recitals for my attorney about my role in the business on a regular basis.  It was a full time job, maybe about 30 hours a week when it was …

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‘Married at First Sight’ reality TV show apparently cast a sociopath as the groom

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[youtube_sc url="https://youtu.be/RD_S3UJIlL8"] Editor's note: The Lovefraud reader “amille2” wrote the following critique. I normally do not watch reality TV shows. The few that I have seen seem anything but real. With that said, I was intrigued when A&E and the DIY networks promoted a show called, "Married at First Sight." The premise is two people marry ....... without meeting in advance. The men and women are matched by a panel of experts: a psychologist, sexologist, spiritual advisor and a professor with a PhD in Sociology.  A modern twist on arranged marriages. They all claim the participants go through rigorous interviews evaluations, background checks, questionnaires, etc. One wou …

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New Jersey sex trafficking victim recovers her life

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To say that the 38-year-old woman, identified as "M.S." in Atlantic County court documents, had a hard life is a profound understatement. Her father was murdered by a serial killer. Her abusive mother abandoned her. A boyfriend got her hooked on heroin. Then another man promised to help her get her son back, but forced her into prostitution. M.S. eventually escaped, and helped put the trafficker in prison. Under a New Jersey law to help victims of sex trafficking, she just had her criminal record expunged. It's an unbelievable story, and evidence that no matter how bad things are, recovery is possible. Atlantic County sex charges expunged for human-trafficking victim, on …

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BOOK REVIEW: The Wise Lesbian’s Guide to Getting Free from Crazy-Making Relationships

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Exploiters are everywhere. Personality disordered individuals can be found in all demographic groups male, female, rich, poor, all races, all religions, all nationalities and all sexual orientations. Amber Ault, Ph.D. is s clinical sociologist and a psychotherapist, and also a member of the Lovefraud Continuing Education team. She's written a book called The Wise Lesbian's Guide to Getting Free from Crazy-Making Relationships and Getting On with Your Life. Reading the book, I was struck by how much exploitative behavior is the same, no matter what community is involved. There are some dimensions to the experience of becoming involved with a sociopath that are specific to the gay community, …

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Let’s Talk Financials with a Sociopath – Part 3 of 5

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Part of a Now 5 Week Series: Week 1:  Running a Business with a Sociopath Week 2:  The Downfall of a Business with a Sociopath Week 3: Preparing for Divorce Week 4: Divorce and Aftermath Part A Week 5:  Divorce and Aftermath Part B Preparing for a Divorce  Out of Denial Now this is where it really gets ugly.  I am going to try and attempt to only highlight the business details of the story, not sure if it's fortunate or not, but I think I will have enough juice to make a full short story of this. I went to the doctor on a Tuesday and had spath watch the little one.  On my way home, I decided it would be nice to stop by the office to bring some candy to my office manager, the new admin …

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Advice for Protecting Elderly Relatives from Sociopaths and Gold Diggers

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Editor's Note: Yesterday, Lovefraud posted a story from a reader whom we'll call "Maura." She describes how a female sociopath latched on to her recently widowed father, took over his life, and tried to hasten his demise. Read the story. Following are tips that Maura and her family learned the hard way. Our Advice On How to Protect An Elderly Relative This is our advice based on our experience to best protect an elderly relative should they marry a sociopath or a gold digger: 1. Immediately hire a private investigator to do a background check on  the new spouse. Verify marriage status, divorce and marriage history, career history, credit history, bankruptcy, ancestry, court records, pre …

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