How to recognize and recover from everyday sociopaths - narcissists

You are here: Home / Lovefraud Blog

Lessons from Sandy Hook: Disturbed people live among us

//  by //  11 Comments

On Friday, the Connecticut State Police released documents related to the investigation into last year's terrible school shooting at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Connecticut. We know the broad strokes of what happened on Dec. 14, 2012: Adam Lanza, age 20, shot and killed his mother, Nancy Lanza, in the home that they shared. Then he went to the nearby Sandy Hook Elementary School and killed 20 first-graders and six adults. Released were thousands of documents, photos, audio recordings and videos. I downloaded one section of the report and opened some of the documents. One that was particularly chilling was the report of Newtown Police Lieutenant Christopher Vanghele, who was …

Lessons from Sandy Hook: Disturbed people live among usRead More

LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: Advice for relatives of elder abuse victims hooked by sociopaths

//  by //  3 Comments

Editor's note: The following letter was received from a Lovefraud reader. Many years ago my wealthy (and elderly) widower father entered into a relationship with a sociopathic woman. She is very charming and beautiful. This was marriage number four for her. Her last marriage had been completely predatory. My father's health is good, his mind is sharp but his memory is failing. The more his memory fails, the more his wife isolates him. She does this in brazen and cruel ways too numerous to write about here in this short note. She also encouraged him to drink alcohol and take potent sleeping pills. He was hospitalized several times for overdose. My father has a substantial estate and it …

LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: Advice for relatives of elder abuse victims hooked by sociopathsRead More

LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: An intense relationship, until he threw me back

//  by //  65 Comments

Editor's note: This letter was sent in by Lovefraud reader whom we'll call "Renata." I know, as far as abuse stories go, this isn't a doozy. I'm sure other women and men have gone through far worse. And that is precisely why I want to share my story, because, even though this guy isn't a major abuser, he's a manipulative, conniving and voracious predator. He will believe he is using his charm and "kindness" to befriend women who are vulnerable and heartbroken, giving them something to feel good about, over and over. He will lead them down the rosy garden path, all the while knowing that he has NO intention of reciprocating a safe and loving relationship. He only uses his "victims" for …

LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: An intense relationship, until he threw me backRead More

Recover from the sociopath by experiencing beauty

//  by //  38 Comments

Donna Andersen at Longwood Gardens What, you're probably wondering, is that pattern behind me? The gigantic, voluptuous red curves on a field of green? They're apples. Thousands of red and green apples. The apples are floating in a few inches of water on the floor of the indoor conservatory of Longwood Gardens. The display is breathtaking. It is beauty for the sake of beauty. And it is incredibly healing. Terry and I recently treated ourselves to a couple of days off.  We took a trip not far and one of the places we visited was Longwood Gardens. Longwood Gardens, in Kennett Square, Pennsylvania, was founded by Pierre DuPont of DuPont company fame in 1906. The conservatory in …

Recover from the sociopath by experiencing beautyRead More

Could oxytocin – the brain’s love chemical – be the real ‘love potion #9’?

//  by //  42 Comments

Editor's note: Joyce M. Short is the author of a just released book, “Carnal Abuse by Deceit.” The book chronicles her life with a predator, the subsequent aftermath and her road to recovery. It also provides advice for victims and their supporters, and discusses the issues surrounding criminalization of rape-by-fraud. Joyce lives in New York City, where she's a real estate broker, professional tennis instructor and a strong advocate for her community. By Joyce M. Short Does Love Potion #9 Really Exist? The hit record written by Leiber & Stoller back in 1959, Love Potion #9, was originally recorded by The Clovers and published by the Aberbach brothers who owned Hill & Range Songs Inc …

Could oxytocin – the brain’s love chemical – be the real ‘love potion #9’?Read More

Reports of U.S. child abuse are down, but fatalities are up

//  by //  3 Comments

Reports of child abuse and neglect totaled 686,000 during fiscal 2012, according to the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. That terrible number is actually an improvement, down from 688,000 in 2011. A total of 1,640 deaths were attributed to child abuse and neglect. About 70% of the children who died were under 3 years old. Parents were the perpetrators in 80% of the cases. New federal data: Child abuse reports dip slightly, but child fatalities rise, on StarTribune.com.   …

Reports of U.S. child abuse are down, but fatalities are upRead More

Narcissistic men and hostility towards women

//  by //  11 Comments

Psychologist Dr Scott Keiller from Kent State University at Tuscarawas conducted a study with 104 men to measure attitudes regarding traditional roles of men and women. He found that narcissistic heterosexual men are more likely to have hostility toward heterosexual women than toward gay women or men.  The narcissists perceive heterosexual women as having more control over whether their sexual desires are fulfilled. A man with attitude, from Science Centric Story suggested by a Lovefraud reader.   …

Narcissistic men and hostility towards womenRead More

Married to A Sociopath: A False Sense of Control

//  by //  36 Comments

By Quinn Pierce   Learning Avoidance When you are in a relationship with a sociopath, you quickly learn the act of avoidance.  Without saying a word, a sociopath can let you know exactly when he or she is angry or disappointed with your behavior.   That leads you to begin reacting to subtle clues and hints that may never be stated, but are clearly understood. For me, I began avoiding all situations that would create that indescribable tension in the house.  The feeling of walking on egg shells while holding my breath. Hollow Choices Sometimes, it would mean turning down a shopping trip with friends, or a trip to the store without the children.  It just became easier to avoid …

Married to A Sociopath: A False Sense of ControlRead More

Bruce Lipton explains why genes are not destiny

//  by //  18 Comments

I use "sociopathy" as an umbrella term to cover several disorders in which people exploit others antisocial personality disorder, psychopathy, narcissism, borderline personality disorder. One of the truly scary aspects of sociopathy is that it is highly genetic. If a child has a sociopathic parent, or sociopaths somewhere on the family tree, the child could inherit a predisposition to become a sociopath as well. So how do you prevent this from happening? By using experience to modify biology. Bruce Lipton, Ph.D., is author of a book called The Biology of Belief: Unleashing the Power of Consciousness, Matter and Miracles. In this video presentation, Lipton lays out the basic science of …

Bruce Lipton explains why genes are not destinyRead More

True recovery from the sociopath through tapping and energy psychology

//  by //  23 Comments

I believe true recovery from sociopathic betrayal is literally in our own hands. Many people have quietly become aware of a healing technique known by several names: tapping, energy psychology, emotional freedom technique (EFT).  Using this approach, many people have recovered from emotional pain, physical pain, illness, anxiety, depression and PTSD. So what is it? With your fingers, you tap certain points on your body mostly on your face while bringing to mind specific aspects of the condition that you want to heal. The tapping creates an electrical charge that breaks the connection between your memory of your experience and how you feel today. It doesn't matter when the past experience …

True recovery from the sociopath through tapping and energy psychologyRead More