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Lovefraud Blog

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Dating after the sociopath

April 16, 2012 //  by Donna Andersen//  98 Comments

A reader posted the following comment on Lovefraud's Facebook page: "This website helps me too, but now, as I venture into the world of dating again, I find that my past is terrible hindrance. So difficult. Any advice gratefully received. Just want to be happy." Many times I've been asked, "After what your con artist ex-husband did to you, can you ever trust again?" Yes I can. I do. I am remarried, and I am happier now than I've ever been, in fact, I'm much happier than I ever was before the sociopath. So how do you climb out of the abyss of profound betrayal? How do you recover? How do you move forward, to the point where you can actually love again? Here are some lessons I've …

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Category: Recovery from a sociopath

Psychopathy Awareness review of Red Flags of Love Fraud

April 15, 2012 //  by Donna Andersen//  Leave a Comment

Claudia Moscovici, author of the Psychopathy Awareness blog, recently posted a review of my new book, Red Flags of Love Fraud 10 signs you're dating a sociopath. She says: As a professional writer myself, I'd say that the most distinctive feature of Red Flags of Love Fraud is the quality of the writing, both in content and form. Donna's writing is well-documented and informed, engaging and psychologically insightful. Insight is when a writer manages to probe deep within, to explain analytically what may be only a vague intuition in the minds of readers. Good writing encourages readers to explore  their psyches, motivations and lives. Insight and introspection are especially important for vic …

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Category: Book reviews

Red Flags of Love Fraud goes beyond surface in explaining the danger of sociopaths

April 13, 2012 //  by Lovefraud Reader//  73 Comments

By Fannie LeFlore, MS,LPC Since she founded Lovefraud.com in 2005, Donna Andersen has heard heartbreaking and horrendous stories from people across the globe who've been victimized by sociopaths. Her new book does what we'd hope parents and schools do on a routine basis: Better prepare people for the complexities of real-life relationships and social interactions, whether business, romantic, family or friends. This requires, as uneasy as it may make us feel, acknowledging that some human beings simply are not interested in being decent, but actually seek to cause harm to others as a way of life. Red Flags of Love Fraud—10 Signs You're Dating a Sociopath, released in Spring 2012 by Ande …

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Category: Book reviews

BOOK REVIEW: Red Flags of Love Fraud by Donna Andersen

April 12, 2012 //  by Joyce Alexander//  31 Comments

By Joyce Alexander, RNP (retired) I was eagerly awaiting the release of this book, Red Flags of Love Fraud 10 signs you're dating a sociopath, and I was not disappointed at all. Donna Andersen, the owner of the LoveFraud.com website, received her “credentials” in dealing with sociopaths (psychopaths) when she married James Montgomery, a full-fledged con man. At the time Donna “enrolled” in this course in the University of Hard Knocks, she was totally unaware that this charming and charismatic man she had married was indeed a sociopath. He conned her out of more than $200,000 during the short course of their marriage, had numerous affairs, and actually fathered a child with another woman du …

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Category: Book reviews

Stress eats holes in your brain

April 10, 2012 //  by Donna Andersen//  39 Comments

Dealing with a sociopath means stress. Somehow, we have to find ways to reduce it. Here's why: Yet another reason to reduce stress: It shrinks your brain, on CommercialAppeal.com. …

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Category: Recovery from a sociopath

Why narcissists get the job

April 7, 2012 //  by Donna Andersen//  43 Comments

A study finds that because narcissists are so comfortable talking about themselves, they often impress people who are interviewing them for jobs. Read Narcissists often ace job interviews, study finds, on News.Yahoo.com. Link supplied by a Lovefraud reader. …

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Category: Explaining the sociopath

Psychopaths and the rules: to comply or not to comply, how do they decide?

April 5, 2012 //  by Linda Hartoonian Almas//  114 Comments

By:  Linda Hartoonian Almas, M.S. Ed When dealing with psychopaths, or individuals with psychopathic features, nothing is as it seems to the naked eye.  When in relationships with psychopathic individuals, the non-psychopaths bear the brunt of great responsibility, both real and perceived. After all, the "normals" really are left carrying the loads and picking up the pieces when the psychopaths are tired of playing the games that they initiated.  However, the blame or burden they attempt to place on us, while accepting none for themselves, is not legitimate and we should not internalize it. Our actions and behaviors have little or nothing to do with the outcomes of their choices, even if t …

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Category: Explaining the sociopath

Deliberate Cruelty From Someone Who Is Meant To Care

April 3, 2012 //  by Mel Carnegie//  48 Comments

  Last week I found myself in an intimidating situation that required me to put all my skills of resilience in to practice. I was in the hands of a professional person who should be there to care for others. I was in a hugely vulnerable position, yet instead of receiving care, I felt myself being belittled, bullied and threatened. The person dishing out this particularly cruel treatment was a senior doctor in a private clinic, where I am a patient. A few years ago I would probably have put up with his behaviour, or brushed it off as being just something I mis-read — but not this time. Not now. Not ever again. So I thought I'd share my story here on Lovefraud. As you already k …

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Category: Recovery from a sociopath

Red Flags of Love Fraud – 10 signs you’re dating a sociopath

April 2, 2012 //  by Donna Andersen//  5 Comments

I am so excited. I can finally start talking about my new book, Red Flags of Love Fraud—10 signs you're dating a sociopath. Who should read this book? Quite frankly, everyone. If you're wondering whether you're in a relationship with a sociopath, this book tells you. If you know you are, or were, involved with a sociopath, this book tells you how you got sucked into the situation and why it's so difficult to get out. If your friends and family can't understand why you got trapped, give them this book. It explains everything. If you want to protect yourself, or someone you care about, from becoming involved with a sociopath, this book tells you how to stay safe. Red Flags of Love F …

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Category: Book reviews, Explaining the sociopath, Recovery from a sociopath, Scientific research, Seduced by a sociopath, Sociopaths and family

Cover image "Evil Eyes"

BOOK REVIEW: Evil Eyes–A daughter’s memoir

March 31, 2012 //  by Liane Leedom, M.D.//  26 Comments

Some of you may have noticed that I haven't been writing for Lovefraud as regularly over the last year. The reason is I have been working to get a research program off the ground. Objective scientific research on psychopathy and the family will inform a better understanding of the disorder and educate professionals about the needs of victims and family members. In a very exciting and lucky turn of events, an expert in “mixed methods” research has an office down the hall from mine at the University of Bridgeport, and l have recently learned a great deal about how to conduct this kind of research. I have long appreciated that the usual mathematical approach to psychological research does not …

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Category: Book reviews, For children of sociopaths, Recovery from a sociopath, Sociopaths and family

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