How to recognize and recover from everyday sociopaths - narcissists

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I am already a better person having the narcissist out of my life

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following email from a reader whom we'll call, Laura20. Names are changed. Last year I opened a piece of mail that would change my life. I opened a credit card bill thinking it was mine, as my husband had all his bills sent to him electronically. As it turned out, his card had been compromised and before he could intercept it the bill came to our home address. On this bill there was a charge from Tiffany after Christmas. I did not receive anything from there, so I asked him about it. He told me a story to cover himself and said he returned it. I then waited a to see if the next bill came to the house to show the return. By then he had his bill back …

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Video: Mandy Friedman, LPCC, on Self-Care for Survivors

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https://youtu.be/qRH9C6E2w4g   If you feel confused, shocked and devastated during, or after, a relationship with a sociopath — according to Mandy Friedman, LPCC, you feel exactly like most victims. You may also feel angry, heartbroken, and like your entire self-concept has been shattered. Now what? How do you rebuild yourself? A critical step, Mandy says, is self-care. That's exactly what she will teach you in her upcoming webinar. For more information, and to sign up, go to the link below. Mandy will give her presentation, and then answer your questions. Self-Care for Survivors Presented by Mandy Friedman, LPCC, CCDVC Thursday, January 23, 8 - 9 pm ET • $25 More info …

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Sociopathic seduction: As long as it takes

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UPDATED FOR 2019 I confess. I am one of those people who fell for the sociopathic seduction. I was swept up in the excitement, sex and love bombing by the sociopath and committed to the relationship far too quickly. James Montgomery proposed to me four days after we met in person. I said yes. I sometimes excuse myself by explaining that we'd been corresponding via e-mail for about a month after meeting online, so it wasn't like I only knew him for four days. But then, of course, a month isn't very long either. I take some comfort in the fact that I am certainly not alone. Many, many people describe the beginning of their relationship with a sociopath as a "whirlwind romance." In …

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How childhood pain leads to involvements with sociopaths

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  Updated for 2019 Lovefraud recently received this letter from a woman whom we'll call "Nina." I'm posting Nina's story because many Lovefraud readers have told me of similar patterns in their lives. I love this man like I've never loved before. He seemed to be my soul mate.  I have had two failed marriages (no sex in them). I was touched by a neighbour starting when I was 10 and it continued for eight years. My father was totally controlling and I was not allowed friends or to go anywhere except to this neighbour. Both were depressed parents and did not show affection, only criticism. I have always felt alone but now am — parents dead, sister dead within last four years. I …

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Despite my education, I knew nothing about sociopaths, says ob/gyn doctor

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following email from a reader whom we'll call, "drsusan." I am a 60 year old retired OB/Gyn MD. I was married for 20 years to a man who turned out to be a narcissist. Despite my education I knew nothing about these types of people or the co-dependency phenomenon in which I was enmeshed. We share 3 sons. I became aware that he was a narcissist in 2000, when one of my patients who knew him casually mentioned it to me. He had recently shocked me by telling me he wanted a divorce, and once I began researching things, saw that his controlling and bullying behavior were signs of narcissism. As the divorce progressed I became aware of all the …

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On Thanksgiving 2019, the energy of gratitude

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  One of the most healing energies of the universe is gratitude. No matter what your situation, finding something to be grateful for can help you move forward. This may seem difficult, especially if you've recently discovered that you've been betrayed by a sociopath. But even under these circumstances, you can be grateful that you have finally learned the truth. My own experience with a sociopath was shattering. But one thing that was demolished was the wall I had built around myself. With that gone, I was able to move forward and find true love and companionship, and for that I am grateful. To all Lovefraud readers, thank you for your contributions to our collective …

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I was almost too brainwashed to believe his sociopathic behavior

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader who posts as "refresh1." It was a random comment I made to a mutual friend that started the whole nightmare. I made a passing comment that this individual would be my 'end up with' guy... eventually one day we'd probably end up together - it was an off-the-cuff overly romanticised comment about a 'charmer' that had always tried to pursue me. I hadn't seen him for years and I was in a long term relationship of seven years with a nice guy at the time. She told him! Almost immediately the sociopath came into my life, turning up to where I worked, making excuses to come into the shop where I would serve him and he …

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Narcissistic Personality Disorder – Domestic Violence in Same Sex Relationships

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from an Australian women whom we'll call Sheila19. Speaking Up about the mental and physical abuse I endured from my last relationship in South Australia is not easy and has taken me some time to finally put into words. For several months during 2019 I lived in fear for my safety from a female Narcissist who was also a perpetrator of Domestic Violence towards me and, while I knew her, was a regular methamphetamine drug user. I had unfortunately been an acquaintance of hers spanning over 3 years. Due to fears that I would be physically targeted or my home attacked if I spoke up was a scary reality and this is exactly the …

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Video: To parents who must send their kids to spend time with a disordered ex

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  You left your partner because he or she is disordered. Unfortunately, you have kids together. So now, you must co-parent and send the kids to spend time with your ex — alone. Knowing the sociopath's abusive personality, you worry. And you wonder — what can you do to help them? Claudia Paradise, LCSW-R, a psychotherapist in New York City, helps parents like you all the time. So now, she is sharing her knowledge and experience with all Lovefraud parents who are in this situation in her upcoming webinar: Empowering the child who must spend time alone with a disordered parent Wednesday, November 20, 2019 • 7 to 9 pm ET • $50 Instructor: Claudia Paradise, LCSW-R This course wi …

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Sociopathic Abuse and Impaired Executive Functioning Skills  

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By Joanie Bentz, B.S., M.Ed., BSC/MT What are executive functioning skills? As a behavioral therapist, I work with many clients who have impaired executive functioning skills. The term sounds pretty fancy and quite technical, but there is a simple explanation. The term executive functioning skills refer to a set of management skills that assist children and adults in achieving their goals through: prioritizing organizing remaining focused regulating emotions As children grow and become critical thinkers, it is necessary to be able to adapt to change and have the ability to revise strategies to reach personal, social and academic goals. What happens when executive …

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