By Mary Ann Glynn, LCSW, CHT After being in a relationship with a sociopath, clients are often conflicted by the idea of forgiveness as recommended by their faith system (I checked and all the world’s major religions admonish to forgive) as opposed to the perpetual anger they feel. As therapists, we never pressure someone who has been abused to forgive their perpetrator, because we don’t want to minimize the impact of that abuse. While someone is moving through the emotions of healing from abuse and trauma, they are going to experience quite a bit of anger, even rage, which can hang around for a long time. Is there such a thing as having too much anger? So when and how do we know how to get …
The Swinging Female Psychopath And The Partner Left Behind: When The Fog Lifts
Well it has been 7 months since our two an a half year "relationship" ended and I am still picking up the pieces. I never ever could have imagined the rabbit hole I'd fallen into. The things I now know have shocked and altered me to the core of my very being. It has been like unraveling the giant web of a black widow, one silky strand at a time. When I met her I thought I had found love at first sight. The connection seemed electric, she was in my estimation perfect. My patchwork princess. We were engaged within six months and three months before we broke up we actually took a marriage covenant together. Well I took the covenant, she used it to gain more dominance and control o …
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Will the sociopath treat the next wife better?
Lovefraud received the following email from a reader: I always knew there was something wrong with my ex-husband, and friends and family did as well. There were lies, gambling, cheating, drug use, rehab 3 times, head games. He would drive erratically with our son and I in the car (even when our son was very little). He would speed up if there was a cat or other animal in the road. I would always completely freak out so he never ran one over when I was in the car, but I wouldn't be surprised if he did when I wasn't. (I could tell his counselor in rehab #3 knew there was more to his problems than just drug addiction.) He was clean for a long time and that's when I realized it wasn't the drugs …
Ironically, a sociopath’s previous weak relationship with a child gives the sociopath great power over that child–I’ll love you now if . . .
Every week, a chapter of my book, "Husband, Liar, Sociopath: How He Lied, Why I Fell For It & The Painful Lessons Learned" (available via Amazon.com, just click on the title or book cover) will be published here on Lovefraud. To read prior chapters, please see the links at the bottom of the post. Chapter 51D: The Earthquake Strikes Daniel was crushed by his father’s choices—his betrayal of our family, his instant girlfriend, the disrespectful way Daniel had learned that Linda even existed and was moving in, the kidnapping of Ella, the mounting lies, and his father’s attempt to keep him from participating in karate. Although I needed every bit of money I had, I promised Daniel that he c …
My sociopathic husband and mind control manipulation
A fresh pail of red barbecue sauce sat on the chef’s counter, ready to marinate overnight. The gluey liquid was lathered on dozens of orders of baby back ribs before they were grilled over flaming logs. I recall thinking, as I brushed on my rouge and applied creamy lipstick for the night shift, that the difference between the calves and myself was measurable. The instant the thought occurred, though, I dismissed it. I wondered at myself. Where did these bizarre thoughts come from? It was the day Stan told me he wanted to take a psychology course at the university. Here I was waitressing nights to keep us afloat and my husband wanted to take a pricey university psychology course about ‘s …
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Yes it looks silly, but scientific research shows EFT Tapping relieves anxiety, depression and PTSD
[youtube_sc url="https://youtu.be/0ErVkIcgOns"] After the sociopath, how to feel better quickly — that was the subject line of an email that I recently sent out about Lovefraud's new webinar on Emotional Freedom Techniques, or "Tapping." "This is the most ridiculous thing I've ever seen," responded one of our readers. I agree — tapping does look ridiculous. My email included the above video of the instructor, Stacey Vornbrock, and me tapping on our faces with our fingertips. But guess what — EFT Tapping works, as numerous scientific studies have found. The EFT Universe website includes a bibliography of more than 100 articles published in peer-reviewed professional journals. Studi …
If you feel an emotional void, the sociopath will step right in
I received email from a woman whom we'll call Adriana: I am told I am a very beautiful, intelligent, fun, woman, but that is all subjective. I am 61 years old but pass for late 40's; good genes. I have been divorced for 10 years and engaged once during that time. I have dated so many men and feel that I have no purpose because I can't find “him.” I don't find most men attractive don't have chemistry with them and I don't want to settle. I have not been successful in love at all and have tried to look within myself to see my faults but the truth is I just want to love and be loved. Anyway, I am so tired of dating and getting my hopes up each time I meet someone I really am attracted t …
If you feel an emotional void, the sociopath will step right inRead More
Escaping the sociopath and battling B.O.B.
Editor’s note: Lovefraud received the following letter from a reader who posts as “stopbuggingme.” After 25 years, she realized that her husband was a sociopath. When my life fell apart a feeling arose that I really hadn’t felt before. Bitterness. I was becoming bitter. A bitter old b*tch. I called her Bob. It was like every time I opened my mouth Bob took over, spewing her bitterness everywhere! Even if I was just talking to myself, Bob would interrupt. She had to be stopped! Here are three things I used to keep Bob from living my life. Laughter Yoga My wonderful sense of humor? Bob stole it. I just couldn’t laugh anymore. It seemed too dire and felt almost fatal. Laughter Yoga (Hasya yoga) …
If the truth is inconvenient, sociopaths lie (with great calm and conviction)
Every week, a chapter of my book, "Husband, Liar, Sociopath: How He Lied, Why I Fell For It & The Painful Lessons Learned" (available via Amazon.com, just click on the title or book cover) will be published here on Lovefraud. To read prior chapters, please see the links at the bottom of the post. Chapter 51C: The Earthquake Strikes I tried to fight the wave of despair cresting above me. I could not. Gravity won—it always does. Anguish and hopelessness pounded down, expelling the air from my lungs and the tone from my body. Yet, driven by the instincts of a mother bear protecting her cub, I pushed through the emotional train wreck and crafted a response to Paul’s email. As before, the i …
If the truth is inconvenient, sociopaths lie (with great calm and conviction)Read More
When women ‘of a certain age’ meet sociopaths
Editor’s note: Lovefraud received the following email from a woman whom we’ll call “Annamaria17.” Donna Andersen responds below. I met the SP in 2006 and he was a supervisor for electric utility company where I live. Due to a power outage he was the Environmental Rep and came to my home. He had just moved here from out of state and I immediately fell for him. We had lunch the next day and that was when I found out he was married. Unhappily of course. Over the next few months, it was agonizing as he would disappear and I had already become addicted to him, the sex and everything else about him. Long story made short, he moved in with me and a month later a friend of mine disclosed tha …