Letters to Lovefraud and Spath Tales

Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader who posts as Gigi2020, who says her whole marriage was a lie. Donna Andersen responds at the end of her story. Letter from Gigi20 I just recently learned that my ex husband lied to me about what I'm guessing is everything, our whole marriage was a lie. I am having a hard time comprehending that he would be able to live his charade for 8 years. I caught him in small lies our whole marriage but I would brush them off. When he drank, which was most of our relationship, but the last year and a half, the red flags were all over the place. However he had told me that he was in an explosion in Iraq, which caused a brain injury …

Her husband was a sociopath, and her whole marriage was a lieRead More

Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story about military love fraud from a reader whom we'll call Sally20. I am a Navy spouse and my active duty husband was the first man I ever met online. He convinced me my 3 kids and I deserved better than their abusive father and the life we were living. He convinced me to marry him and fight to move myself and my 3 kids to Guam for his overseas tour. I did. I won and we all moved to the other side of the world where things began not seeming normal. He became very critical of everything we did from washing to dishes to sitting correctly on a couch. I was not only finding evidence of other women but was also contacted by other women, …

Military love fraud: Navy husband moves her to Guam, then abandons herRead More

Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following letter about a cheating sociopathic fiancé from a reader whom we'll call, "Mandy20." I met my ex-fiancé in 2017 at work. He was attractive and charming. I found out he was engaged and although a co-worker thought he was flirting (he asked me if I had ever been to the Melting Pot) I didn’t pursue anything at that time. I ran into him at work after Christmas and when I asked about his holiday he said his fiancé gave him his ring back. We then connected on Facebook and started “talking” via Messenger (first red flag!) I told him I had recently broken up with someone too and suggested we go to the Melting Pot to commiserate. He then said he th …

My cheating sociopathic fiancéRead More

Editor's note: A Lovefraud reader, whom we'll call "Abigail20," describes how she met a man, had a child with him, and now the sociopath ignores his child. I met the sociopath at a birthday party in 2004, after exchanging numbers and a few dates I realised I only liked him as a friend, he tried to get tactile very early on but I rejected his advances, truth is my feelings lay elsewhere and regrettably I let the sociopath know this yet still he persisted, he still wanted to be around me, he knew exactly what he was doing and what his motives were. During the initial stages we were hanging out together as friends, so I thought, I learned that he was living as a tenant with a former …

Sociopath ignores his child, the ‘dirty little secret’Read More

Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader, whom we'll call Barb20, about the price of not listening to intuition. I was in a relationship with a sociopath for 10 years on and off. Two of those married to him. I am currently separated from him and living in another state. I originally met him online and we started dating. I remember the first few dates I had a little person inside telling me I was too good for him but quickly squashed that because it seemed so conceited. He came from a low income family, didn’t graduate high school and drove a truck for a living. I come from a middle class family, I’m a college graduate and had a good career. Knowing what I k …

Not listening to intuition costs her 10 yearsRead More

Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story about a vacation love that became a con from a reader whom we'll call Elsa20. Names are changed. I met Aslan when I was staying at a hotel in Istanbul. He worked at the front desk. We established a friendship. I left to travel around Turkey and came back to Istanbul and it was the beginning of a long distance relationship. He moved to another city in Turkey to work as a hotel manager. I visited him 3 times. He said he loved me; he wanted to marry me. On one of my visits he asked me for $5,000 to pay his military exemption. After back and forth I wired him the money using Western Union. He promised he would pay me back in May …

Her vacation love became a conRead More

Editor's note: Last week Lovefraud published an article written by a reader who posts as "Natalia20" called, "The sociopathic singer and his many women." Today, I'll address another of her questions, "Are there harmless sociopaths?" Of course, sociopaths usually have some agenda ... exploiting, want a control, etc. But are there people who have no empathy and conscience but live their lives “normally” without having any victims – just not having emotions? I give you an example: My friend Kat. She earns a lot of money but she is super stingy, and always a freeloader but I don´t think she would use someone in order to gain (but she doesn´t feel embarrassed about asking for guest lists and …

Question: Are there harmless sociopaths?Read More