How to recognize and recover from everyday sociopaths - narcissists

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LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: My ex-wife, the sociopath (Part 4)

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Editor's note: The following story was sent to Lovefraud by a man whom we'll call "Anthony." He believes his ex-wife is a sociopath. This is part 4 of 4. The story refers to spiritual concepts. Please read Lovefraud's statement on Spiritual Recovery. Read: Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 Trying to make sense of the insanity: How could someone behave this way? At this point I was totally bewildered and completely devastated. Nothing at all made sense to me. I remembered all of the strange events that happened throughout our “relationship,” and I knew that they all tied together somehow, but even the events themselves were so bizarre, that my mind just could not make sense of them. I knew that she was …

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LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: My ex-wife, the sociopath (Part 3)

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Editor's note: The following story was sent to Lovefraud by a man whom we'll call "Anthony." He believes his ex-wife is a sociopath. This is part 3 of 4. The story refers to spiritual concepts. Please read Lovefraud's statement on Spiritual Recovery. Read: Part 1 - Part 2 The Incompetent Therapist After several years of scratching my head and trying to deal with my wife's odd behavior, and trying to deal with an obvious dysfunctional relationship with her highly manipulative teenage daughter, I finally sought the help of a therapist. At this point in the “relationship,” I had put many of the pieces together. I still did not know about sociopaths\psychopaths, or how these people behave and wha …

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LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: My ex-wife, the sociopath (Part 2)

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Editor's note: The following story was sent to Lovefraud by a man whom we'll call "Anthony." He believes his ex-wife is a sociopath. This is part 2 of 4. The story refers to spiritual concepts. Please read Lovefraud's statement on Spiritual Recovery. Read: Part 1 Early Bird Gets “The Worm” When we met, in late January of 2008, Jezabel's morning schedule was to report to the office at 6am, She said that she liked getting her work done while it was quiet. Her alarm would go off at 5am, and she would leave for the office by 5:45, to arrive by 6:00. From 6am until probably about 8:00am, there were no co-workers in the state government building at all. Most of the other workers started to report t …

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LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: My ex-wife, the sociopath (Part 1)

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Editor's note: The following story was sent to Lovefraud by a man whom we'll call "Anthony." He believes his ex-wife is a sociopath. He tells his story in great detail, so it will be  serialized, appearing today and over the next three days. The story refers to spiritual concepts. Please read Lovefraud's statement on Spiritual Recovery. Meeting the Perfect Woman I met her through a mutual friend one evening at a local restaurant. I found her strikingly attractive, and we made a plan to have dinner the following week, which we did. I was “hooked” fairly quickly, and I remember thinking many times how I must have been the luckiest man alive to have this gorgeous and intelligent woman want to …

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LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: The sociopath has zero power over how I think

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following email from a reader who posts as "Angela." I am in the beginning stages of divorcing my sociopath husband. Today, I went to the house to move out, since my children and I left with nothing 6 weeks ago. He was allowed to be there, though I don't understand why as I have a restraining order against him. That was a ”¦ well, it was a sociopathic experience. He laughed and joked with the police officers who were mediating the whole circus and as soon as I left, he took to social media to talk about his "feelings." He rambled on about how cold and heartless I am, and how I will realize what I've lost when it's too late. Are you joking?????? One of th …

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LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: I’m setting boundaries and he HATES it

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following e-mail from a reader whom we'll call Wendy. I have read your blog so much over the last 3 years that it has become a very valuable tool in the fight against my sociopath ex. Forgive me for how I say this, but it is my weapon of mass destruction against him in my fight for my son's mental and emotional well-being. (Baby is 2& 1/2.) My story started early 2009 when I met my sociopath. It was a whirlwind courtship and of course he said all the right things to a single Mom whose husband had died 6 years before. I became pregnant later that year and that's when my oldest child's and my world flipped upside down. He began by accusing me of …

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LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: The Other Prey – loving someone previously married to a sociopath

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Editor's note: The following was written by a Lovefraud reader whom we'll call "Winifred." This is titled "The Other Prey," and is for all of us who have chosen to love our current partners who were married to, or close to, sociopaths in the past. When I met my husband over 15 years ago, he had filed for divorce. Even though he was an extremely quiet and private man, after years of friendship, he shared with me that his soon-to-be ex wife was a "sociopath"! I was in my late 30s and had heard of this term before, but one never really can begin to absorb what it means until you experience a sociopath first hand as I am. Growing up as a child of an alcoholic mother, I had been in two failed …

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LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: I wanted him to ‘fix’ me

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following from a reader whom we'll call "Eugenie." My sociopath got in touch through a mutual friend on Facebook. We had been at college together, although I didn't remember him. He was quirky, charismatic, attentive, open, romantic and respectful. We didn't even kiss until I'd been seeing him for six weeks. Over the next few months, we went on several weekends away to European cities and to places in England —where I'm from. We saw each other about twice a week and I was happy with that. I have a busy and independent life and he appeared to have the same. He had a history of serial adultery, a failed marriage, several failed relationships and m …

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LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: I lived in denial

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Editor's note: The following story was written by a Lovefraud reader whom we'll call "Alyce." When is it possible to forgive myself? I met a very charismatic man who was lecturing at a local dog boarding kennel. Over the course of a year I attended training, and I watched him help many people. He quoted science books and talked about papers he had written at university. We became friends, me asking for advice and he was always obliging beyond anyone else I met. I was quite attracted to him, but happy to keep that attraction to myself. Then he declared one day he was attracted to me. I suppose I was flattered. A romance began and we moved far too quickly. Before I knew it we were …

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LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: I need to have my experience to count for something

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Editor's note: The following was written by Noelle R. Andrews, author of "Aftermath of Rock 'n' Roll." Read about her book in the article posted earlier today. Some people are born selfless. Mother Teresa, who worked with Calcutta's poor for decades, is a classic example. The caring people who worked with lepers on Hawaii's island of Molokai are another. Other people, like me, take up a cause because some experience has affected our lives in a profound way. Susan G. Koman's sister died of breast cancer. The foundation she created in her sister's honor is one of the best-known fundraisers for this disease. Jennie McCarthy has fought to raise awareness for autism, after her son was given …

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