Letters to Lovefraud and Spath Tales

Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following email from a reader who posts as “Eclipse.” She wrote about her experience with a sociopathic con man.  I met the P at the end of 2004. We both worked out at a local gym close to my home. I had been going through a divorce for about a year. I confided to him about my 19-year marriage, of abuse. We became friends for about six months. We then became involved and were falling for each other. He told me he was in a bad relationship, and that he was married, eight months into our relationship. He told me he was trapped and was trying to get a divorce. He told me how his wife was controlling and mentally abusive to him; he was denied any a …

LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: Looking into the eyes of a con manRead More

Editor's note: Lovefraud received this letter from a reader named “Krzyluv” who found herself in a sociopath's twisted web. I would like to start by saying that a concerned friend referred me to this website, and I must say that I never in a million years would think that there was anyone out there who was like me, or would ever believe what has happened to me and my children. The stories and blogs I have read have inspired so much strength and courage inside of this empty shell of a woman that I have become! Thank you from the bottom of my heart for having such an inspiring website as this. It makes me think that if all these women can be that brave and do it, so can I. My story sta …

LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: Tangled in his twisted webRead More

Editor's note: The following story was received from a reader whom we'll call “Violet” about her experience with a long grift, not of money, but of intimacy. I knew L when we worked together at a call centre as customer service representatives. He seemed nice, and he had lovely, expressive brown eyes and a gentle nature. I was losing weight at the time, and he asked for my help, so of course I gave him advice and tips. He began to lose weight, and he invited me over to his and his girlfriend, M's, apartment for dinner and to show him some 'exercise moves' (now I think it was mostly an excuse to ogle me). He looked at me very intently, it wasn't menacing, but I definitely felt like he wan …

LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: The long griftRead More

Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following e-mail from a reader who posts as BentNotBroken. She is having difficulty breaking off an involvement with a sociopath and really needs help. My head is so full that I don't really know where to start. I dated a man (off and on) for 2-1/2 years, and recently found out that he was having several long-term relationships at the same time. I had never been in an abusive relationship, so I didn't know what the gut-wrenching feeling meant. I didn't know to trust it. My mind is playing tricks on me at this point. Is he or isn't he? The signs are so obvious, but then I think of his face, his touch, his words, and I melt. How can this man — t …

LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: Lost and really need helpRead More

Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader who we'll call “Kay.” She discovered that her magic relationship was all about him. Kay and the Loser in Aluminum Foil He was prince charming, at least to me he was. We liked the same music, the same food, we spoke about the same topics, liked frequenting the same places, everything was so right. My friends, however, had a complete aversion to his instant overbearing interest in all things Kay. He completely immersed himself in my life and was constantly "making sure" I was okay. He made sure he monopolized all my time. He would call me approximately 20-25 times a day. During working hours he made sure he& …

LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: This was all about him and all about what he neededRead More

Editor's note: Lovefraud received this letter from a reader who we'll call “Abigail.” She relates how she felt bonded to a man, even after he brutally assaulted her. I grew up very sheltered in an ultra-religious family; I had no knowledge whatsoever about deceitful liars. I should have because my also very innocent and trusting mother was misled by one man like that, who deceived her, promising her marriage, just to end up getting her pregnant (with me) and then leave her and us for good. My family, however, preferred to deal with this issue by keeping it as much secret as possible, so unfortunately I couldn't learn from my mother's mistakes. I have been sheltered in a "glass box" all …

LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: I felt bonded, even though this made me nauseatedRead More