Recovery from a sociopath

  A year ago, Lovefraud posted an email exchange that I had with a reader, whom we called "Alana." Alana dated a man who at first love bombed her, was obsessed with her and then turned ugly. She tried to leave him many times, and he threatened to kill himself. She finally managed to break it off. Then six months later, he sent her an email from a new email address, begging for her to return. Alana wrote back out of guilt and shame and then felt sick about it. She asked for reassurance that No Contact was the right approach. Read the story here: After 6 months of No Contact, the sociopath wants to begin again I just heard from Alana again. Here's her latest email: It has been a …

After a year of No Contact, she saw the sociopath and felt – nothingRead More

By Amber Ault, Ph.D., MSW Toxic relationships cause damage to partners' self-esteem and self-confidence, to partners' connections with their support systems, and to their confidence in their own judgment and the goodness of other people. As a coach and therapist specializing in supporting partners and exes of psychopaths, narcissists, and people with Borderline Personality Disorder, I have come to believe that a valuable healing resource for survivors comes in the form of sympathetic connections with others sometimes as one-on-one therapeutic relationships, sometimes as communities of people who have had similar experiences, and sometimes as new relationships with supportive partners. These …

Two teleseminars: ‘Rollercoaster Relationship Recovery’ and ‘Dating After a Difficult Relationship’Read More

Recently I received an email about a free online program being presented by Donna Eden, the pioneer of energy medicine, on Wednesday, March 30, 2016. Energy medicine is a combination of Eastern healing disciplines and Western science. The basic premise is that life energy flows through our bodies called qi in Chinese medicine and prana in Sanskrit. All illness reflects a block or disturbance in the life force. Opening the block and restoring the proper energy flow can lead to healing. Simple daily practices can keep your life force flowing the way it should, to build your vitality and prevent illness. Although it is not well known in our society, energy medicine is one of five alternative …

March 30: Free online introduction to Donna Eden’s Energy MedicineRead More

H.G. Beverly will be back next Friday to continue posting the rest of her book, My Ex is a Psychopath. She took a short break from posting to tend to family matters, but you can look for her next post on Friday, March 11, 2016. Many thanks! …

My Ex is a PsychopathRead More

  I've written quite a few times about the wonderful relationship that I have with my husband, Terry Kelly. Yes, there is love after a sociopath. Terry is my business partner in Lovefraud. He funded building the website and the printing of my books. When business decisions about Lovefraud need to be made, he's my consultant. He even handles shipping when we receive book orders. I'm writing this as I sit in the ICU waiting room of our local hospital. Terry suffered a heart attack on Tuesday. It's been a long week. This came totally out of the blue. Terry does not have any of the typical risk factors of heart disease. No family history. No smoking. He's not overweight, he eats well, he …

Please keep Lovefraud co-founder in your thoughts and prayersRead More

If you sought professional counseling because of an involvement with someone who may be disordered, Lovefraud wants to know about your experience. Working with Dr. Liane Leedom and the University of Bridgeport, we are gathering data for scientific research about the therapeutic experience of those who sought therapy in the context of an abusive relationship. The survey is completely anonymous no personal information is collected at all. What did you experience? Did the therapist understand what you were talking about? Did he or she help you realize what you were dealing with? Or was the counselor completely clueless about personality disorders? Did the person make you feel worse instead of …

Been to counseling because of abuse? Fill out the Therapy Satisfaction Survey – closing soon!Read More

Are Things Really What We Think They Are? Things aren't always what they seem, that's for sure. And sometimes things aren't always what they seem when they are right in your face. People can't really be persuaded, even if something is right in their face. For whatever their reasons are, people have to come to their own conclusions about things. And most of the time it's difficult for family and friends to watch someone they love continue in a path that is harmful to them. Living In Secret Those of us who fall into the victim category, well, we live in secret. We live in secret about what is really going on for a lot of reasons. We are in denial of our own circumstances even though we know …

Living in Secret with the SociopathRead More

Chapter Six I Wouldn't Let That Happen It's your fault for letting yourself get hurt. Just reading that sentence probably makes you agitated. But people say that about each other all the time. We blame victims for letting themselves get hurt. Now maybe you want to say, “NO I DON'T.” It's offensive, right? We all want to be the kind of person who shows up with band-aids and soup and enough time to really listen and care about what happened. That's because we're decent people, and we do care. But think for a moment about how we respond differently to the kind of hurt that takes a band-aid and that we can see maybe happening to us and the kind of hurt that we never, ever want to touch our liv …

Is It Really My Fault? A Victim Fights Back Against Victim-BlameRead More