How to recognize and recover from everyday sociopaths - narcissists

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Domestic abuse victim predicted her death with restraining orders

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Amy Hargrove, a 28 year-old resident of Washington State was found strangled in her parent's home on January 6, 2014. Since 2012, Hargrove got two restraining orders against her abusive ex-boyfriend Michael Crowly because she feared for her life. 'A piece of paper isn't going to save my life when he finally gets me, but at least you will know who killed me,' said Hargrove in one of the petitions to King County Court. Crowly, who abused Hargrove for years is considered a person of interest  and is cooperating with authorities but has not yet been charged with her death. 'A bit of paper isn't going to save me, but at least you'll know who killed me': Woman's pleas months before ex …

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LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: Document. Document. Document.

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Editor's note: The following letter was received from a Lovefraud reader whom we'll call “Gianna.” When I left my ex he always promised me he would never let me have the kids. I have custody of our children, but he has not left me alone. Contempt motions Recently, we were back in court for a contempt motion he had filed against me. The magistrate stated I was not in contempt, but proceeded to set a date for a full day hearing anyway. My ex played the missing-the-kids-wanting-more-time-with-them card, so even though I didn't violate anything we are supposed to work out a better visitation schedule for him — one that gives him more time than Local Rules outline. Now, even though I am not …

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Man in Turkey sentenced to rape by fraud

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Editor's note: Here's more news from "Mavi" in Turkey. She has translated a news article for Lovefraud. Some more accurate English translations are suggested in italics. Women rights are miserable in my country. We have the so-called rights, but socially we don't have them. I should probably separate myself from the majority because I live in an intellectual circle, so I don't suffer from social pressure like the others do. Anyway, the rapists, pedophiles, murderers don't get what they deserve legally most of the time. But yesterday I read this news: A psychopath defrauded many women; many of them have been scared and avoided giving testimony but two women did and he has been condemned …

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Recovery From a Sociopath: The fake victim and the real victim

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by Quinn Pierce When I first met my ex-husband, I was moved by the amount of compassion and sympathy he showed for the traumatic experiences of my past.  To me, it was an endearing quality for someone to be so caring and supportive.  He kept telling me how honored he was that I trusted him enough to tell him things I hadn't talked to many people about before. Ulterior Motives I look back with cringe-inducing clarity, and I recognize several ulterior motives for his false compassion. For one, he was assessing me as a partner.  He learned that, at the time, I was a very secretive person.  I had a select few people I confided in, and I was not one to talk to others about my own painful exp …

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‘Divorce Corp’ documentary exposes corrupt and collusive divorce industry – even before the sociopaths show up

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Divorce Corp, a documentary playing in selected theaters through Jan. 16, 2014, takes direct aim at unscrupulous judges, lawyers and family court professionals, and the incestuous system that enables them to feed each other business and get rich. Some women's organizations consider the film to be dangerously one-sided. But I think it at least begins a discussion about what is really going on in family courts. Here's how the Divorce Corp documentary producers describe their movie: More money flows through the family courts, and into the hands of courthouse insiders, than in all other court systems in America combined — over $50 billion a year and growing. Through extensive r …

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And the most accurate psychopath in cinema award goes to …

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A paper recently published in the  Journal of Forensic Sciences investigates the relationship between cinema and psychopathy to describe and analyze the portrayal of fictional psychopathic characters in popular films over cinematic history. Rather than assessing their commercial success or “esthetic efficiency” and appeal, authors Samuel J. Leistedt, M.D., Ph.D.; and Paul Linkowski, M.D., Ph.D. assess the degree to which the fictional characters portrayal was realistic from the clinical and psychopathological viewpoint of psychiatrists, clinical psychologists, and mental health professionals. Four hundred films made between 1915 and 2010 were studied and yielded 126 psychopathic char …

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LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: With this man, I felt physically ‘poisoned’

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Editor's note: The following letter was received from a Lovefraud reader named Paula. Dear Donna, I read your story and the one about Lance Larabee. The man I was friends with was also a pilot, so that one caught my eye. I must say that I felt physically "sick" hearing all of the just disgusting ways in which Lance violated boundaries with his poor girlfriend despite her very obviously courageous attempts to "protect" herself with all those promissory notes. By the end of the story, it was predictable that expecting him to write his life insurance policy over to her in order to pay her back would never happen. I could almost see him laughing at that, which made me literally feel …

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LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: I loved him and supported him … all while he was lying, cheating and using me

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Editor's note: The following letter was received from a Lovefraud reader whom we'll call “Nicolette.” Names have been changed. I met “Jackson” online. I wasn't looking for a relationship exactly, just checking to see what was out there. He was the very first person to message me and he was exactly my type. We became Facebook friends and chatted for a couple days he seemed to have all the same interests — art, music, travel, etc. He seemed to have lived an interesting life as a touring musician in some well known bands. Now, he had just moved back to Florida, bought a house, and was building a recording studio in his home. That was his big new venture and he was confident with his connecti …

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Why is it so difficult to detach from a sociopath?

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by Quinn Pierce The other day, in one of my counseling sessions, I was recounting a story about some family members who still interact with my ex-husband, despite my requests that they respect me enough to not have any contact with him. I was no longer angry or annoyed by their behavior, I had since realized it is much easier if I lower my expectations for some people in my life and distance myself from others.  But, I was curious about their inability to stop contact with my ex-husband even after knowing everything he has done to my family. The Inexplicable Bond It led me to wonder: Why is it so difficult to detach from a sociopath? It seems as though it makes no difference if …

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New oxytocin study encouraging to parents of autistic children

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Oxytocin, sometimes referred to as “the love hormone,” has been found to affect the parts of the brain connected to emotional bonding, trust and many biological processes. Lovefraud has previously discussed the role of oxytocin in love relationships. A new study recently published in the the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences highlights how oxytocin may be helpful for another group of people who have difficulty establishing personal bonds those with autism spectrum disorder. Parents of autistic children are encouraged by the new study and are requesting doctors prescribe it for their children. Experts say parents should wait until more is known. Oxytocin Found to Stimulate …

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