How to recognize and recover from everyday sociopaths - narcissists

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The sociopath left me to go back to his wife 5 times over the past 14 years

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Editor's Note:  This SPATH Tale was submitted by the Lovefraud reader whom we'll call "Tilly Marie." I've been involved with a sociopath for over 14 years. We met at work and fell in love. At least I did. We were both married to other people at the time, and there has been a merry dance led between myself and his wife ever since -- he leaves her, sets up home with me, kicks me out, there's a dramatic showdown, then he ignores me for weeks or months. This has happened five times in 14 years -- that last time being a few weeks ago. I could never fully understand the reasons why he did this, to me or to her. He's painted me as crazy to her and her as crazy to me. Wash. Rinse. …

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UK broadens definition of domestic abuse to include controlling, coercive and threatening behavior

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British Home Secretary Theresa May wants men and women who trap their partners in a cycle of emotional cruelty to be prosecuted and jailed under tough new laws proposed by ministers. Police and prosecutors would be expected to take action against those who trap their partners in a "living hell" through a campaign of psychological and financial control. Last year, the British government broadened the definition of domestic abuse to encompass "any incident or pattern of incidents of controlling, coercive or threatening behaviour, violence or abuse, between those aged 16 or over who are, or have been, intimate partners or family members regardless of gender or sexuality." New law to …

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After the Will Jordan case, New Jersey may make rape by fraud a crime

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William Allen Jordan, a serial con artist, told multiple women that he was a secret agent to seduce them. When he spun the story for Mischele Lewis, of Florence Township, New Jersey, Jordan didn't break any laws. It was not illegal to create a fake identity in order to convince her to have relations with him. That may change. The New Jersey assemblyman representing Mischele's district, Troy Singleton, has introduced a bill that would make rape by fraud illegal. Lovefraud hopes this measure becomes law. Rape by fraud? N.J. lawmaker introduces bill to make it a crime, on NJ.com. Of course, Lovefraud broke the Will Jordan story with the Daily Mail: EXCLUSIVE: Moment heartbroken woman …

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I still can’t believe he convinced me to stay

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Editor's Note: This Spath Tale was submitted by the Lovefraud reader whom we'll call "Peggy-Elizabeth." I met him in 1997 and eloped in 1998. Even though that little voice inside told me not to, I still married him. I found that I took my vows more seriously than he EVER did. He's cheated on me since day one. He's lied, cheated, stolen money, forged checks, pawned all of MY belongings, used my credit cards, gave my clothes to girlfriends and only he knows what else. Obviously, I didn't know all this then but I had my suspicions, yet when I began distancing myself again, the story of him being a victim of child molestation emerged. This caused a major rift in his family, and now being …

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‘Sociopath’ – A Poem

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Editor's Note: This poem was written by a Lovefraud reader. Sociopath By J. Boehm Aren't we taught there is good in every person? But some are so evil you couldn't imagine Living with us in greater numbers than you can fathom With no conscience to hinder their action Their charm and wit gets us every time Along with abundant compliments sublime They will make you feel sorry for them too With sad stories they never even went through Every word they say is a lie They are experts at feigning a cry You may have reached out to a human shell Believing all the lies they tell If they hook you because of your trusting nature You are not to blame for your kind gesture They are …

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Why relationships with sociopaths are so addictive

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Time and time again, when I do personal consultations, people tell me how they struggle to break away from a relationship with a sociopath. You know the involvement is bad for you. But even when you're not forced to interact with the sociopath you're not married, don't have kids with the person and don't work together you can't cut the cord. Why? Because relationships with sociopaths are highly addictive. There are psychological and biological reasons for this, which I'll explain. Psychological bond Any time two human beings enter into a relationship, a psychological love bond forms. This bond begins early in the relationship because of pleasure. In the beginning, both people are doing …

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Never send money to Nigerians or others you meet online

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Lovefraud received the following email from a reader Just want to know if I am right on this. I am communicating with 4 guys on the Internet and all have asked for money. They have all sent me pictures of them and the kids, to prove they are "real." Also have cell phone numbers. They are all in Nigeria "working" and seem to have one problem or another. One has finished his job and has been paid, but cannot cash the check. He wants me to send him money to come home on; I have refused. One is still working in Nigeria and needs me to repay a loan for him because he cannot send money out of the country...I refused. One cannot use his credit cards in Nigeria and needs me to send him …

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Woman accused of murdering her husband and dragging his remains around for seven years

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It is the stuff of horror movies. Loretta Doyle Burroughs, a 63-year-old grandmother, is accused of killing her husband and packing his remains into two plastic containers, which she brought with her when she moved at least twice over seven years. Donna Andersen got an exclusive interview with the victim's brother, Ray Wantorcik, which was published by Mail Online. EXCLUSIVE: 'She stabbed him to death and kept his chopped up remains in plastic containers for 7 years, enjoying her life.' Brother of victim whose wife is charged with murder reveals she dragged the remains along each time she moved, on Dailymail.co.uk.   …

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LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: Hindsight is 20/20; his love was all a fraud (Part 3 – Escape, Freedom and Love)

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Editor's Note: This letter to Lovefraud was submitted by the Lovefraud reader who goes by the name "Lil' Bit." This is a three-part letter. Read Part 1 — The Imbalance. Part 2 — Absolute Power. This is Part 3.   We get married and my son goes to trade school Now, it was decided when we left for our honeymoon July of 2010 that the $600 a month X had been collecting since the previous April (and keeping) in rent from my property would become only $300 beginning that August -- allowing my son to then keep $75 weekly for his needs. It was also at this time that my son, following through with his part in our plans for him, began Trade school. He graduated that following May and …

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LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: Hindsight is 20/20; his love was a fraud (Part 2 – Absolute power)

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Editor's Note: This letter to Lovefraud was submitted by the Lovefraud reader who goes by the name "Lil' Bit." This is a three-part letter. Read Part 1 — The Imbalance. This is Part 2 — Absolute Power. Kindhearted people too often are preyed upon by Narcissists  I have known many Narcissists in my lifetime. I had not yet been schooled on the psychology of narcissism though, but looking back now, obviously my education had begun, I just had not realized yet what it was that I was seeing. I chuckle still as I recall X exclaim that he could relate well with all my exes, evil men, drug addicts, pedophiles, violent men and thieves, who like him, once they realized they could not be who …

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