Donna Andersen, Author at Lovefraud | Escape sociopaths - narcissists in relationships

The Atlantic writes sparsely about psychopaths and rehabilitation

February 9, 2014 // by Donna Andersen// 6 Comments

The Atlantic Magazine was founded in 1857 by luminaries such as Ralph Waldo Emerson and Henry Wadsworth Longfellow. The publication was known for literary and cultural commentary. Today the magazine and its website, TheAtlantic.com, are primarily aimed at "thought leaders." So when I saw that TheAtlantic.com published a piece entitled, Can Psychopaths Be Rehabilitated?, I was pleased to see this topic be addressed by a well-respected publication. I anticipate it would present a thorough and thoughtful discussion of the issue. I was disappointed. What the author, Carla Norton, wrote was accurate, but she barely scratched the surface of this topic. She spends half of the short article …

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BOOK REVIEW: Carnal Abuse by Deceit

February 4, 2014 // by Donna Andersen// 10 Comments

Many, many Lovefraud readers, I am sure, will be able to relate to Joyce M. Short's new book, Carnal Abuse by Deceit How a Predator's Lies Became Rape. I wish this were not the case, but it is. Joyce lives in New York City, where she's a real estate broker, professional tennis instructor and a strong advocate for her community. Much of the book is her personal story, and this is what will feel so familiar to many readers. Joyce writes about her outwardly successful, well-off family of origin and what was really going on behind closed doors. Here's a hint: Her father wasn't necessarily the upstanding citizen that he presented himself to be. She writes about young, handsome and …

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Why sociopaths keep showing up

February 3, 2014 // by Donna Andersen// 19 Comments

A Lovefraud reader recently sent me the following question: I seem to only attract what I believe are sociopaths into my life even when I am not trying to find anyone. I feel as if they find me and try to befriend me. Is there some kind of an explanation for this? This reader posts as "Sam." Last year I published her story as a "Letter to Lovefraud." The explanation for her current experience is in her story. Please read it: I have no further use to him and I am being disposed of Sam's story is absolutely tragic. Here is what happened to her: She witnessed domestic violence from a very young age. She left home before she turned 15. She suffered from depression. Her …

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Young woman whose mother kidnapped her as a child speaks out

January 30, 2014 // by Donna Andersen// 6 Comments

Back in 1994, Dorothy Barnett lost custody of her still-nursing 9 1/2-month-old daughter to her ex-husband, Benjamin Harris Todd. According to news reports, when Barnett became pregnant, Todd originally wanted her to terminate it. Then, as they split up, Todd painted her as mentally deficient, and convinced the court in Charleston, South Carolina, to award him custody. Fearing for her daughter's safety, Barnett took her and disappeared for almost 20 years. In November, she was located in Australia and arrested for parental kidnapping. The child, now called Samantha Geldenhuys, 20, never knew of her history. For the first time, she tells her story on Australian TV. Woman kidnapped …

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BOOK REVIEW: Living and Loving After Betrayal

January 27, 2014 // by Donna Andersen// 25 Comments

I've been looking for a book to help you heal from the devastating betrayal of a sociopath. I finally found it. Living and Loving After Betrayal How to Heal from Emotional Abuse, Deceit, Infidelity, and Chronic Resentment, by Steven Stosny, Ph.D., is the best explanation I've ever read of how betrayal affects you emotionally and psychologically, and how to recover from it. In fact, I am so impressed with this book that we are now carrying it in the Lovefraud bookstore. Why it hurts Stosny starts the book by explaining why intimate betrayal hurts so much. Love bonds developed because they were crucial to the survival of the human race. Back in caveman days, we needed to look out for …

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Documents reveal Chicago Catholic Church sex abuse cover-up

January 22, 2014 // by Donna Andersen// Leave a Comment

The Chicago Diocese of the Roman Catholic Church moved priests accused of child molestation from parish to parish, hiding their histories from the community, according to lawyers for the victims. The Diocese says allegations against 65 priests were substantiated. Documents related to 30 of them were posted on the Internet yesterday. Archdiocese of Chicago fought to conceal abuse claims: report, on NYDailyNews.com. Website with the actual documents: Archdiocese of Chicago Documents, on AndersonAdvocates.com More on the crisis: U.N. committee criticizes Vatican for allegedly enabling child sex abuse, on NYDailyNews.com. …

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‘Divorce Corp’ documentary exposes corrupt and collusive divorce industry – even before the sociopaths show up

January 13, 2014 // by Donna Andersen// 5 Comments

Divorce Corp, a documentary playing in selected theaters through Jan. 16, 2014, takes direct aim at unscrupulous judges, lawyers and family court professionals, and the incestuous system that enables them to feed each other business and get rich. Some women's organizations consider the film to be dangerously one-sided. But I think it at least begins a discussion about what is really going on in family courts. Here's how the Divorce Corp documentary producers describe their movie: More money flows through the family courts, and into the hands of courthouse insiders, than in all other court systems in America combined — over $50 billion a year and growing. Through extensive r …

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New oxytocin study encouraging to parents of autistic children

January 7, 2014 // by Donna Andersen// Leave a Comment

Oxytocin, sometimes referred to as “the love hormone,” has been found to affect the parts of the brain connected to emotional bonding, trust and many biological processes. Lovefraud has previously discussed the role of oxytocin in love relationships. A new study recently published in the the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences highlights how oxytocin may be helpful for another group of people who have difficulty establishing personal bonds those with autism spectrum disorder. Parents of autistic children are encouraged by the new study and are requesting doctors prescribe it for their children. Experts say parents should wait until more is known. Oxytocin Found to Stimulate …

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Issues to consider before taking a sociopath to court

January 6, 2014 // by Donna Andersen// 34 Comments

Lovefraud recently received the following email: I was previously married to a sociopath, and we have a 4-year old son together. I have sole legal and physical custody of our son, but have been fighting to reduce the amount of visitation for quite some time. I recently read that having a forensic psychological analysis done on the entire family would reveal that my ex is a sociopath and possibly prevent him from having ANY visitation going forward. Is this true, in your experience? Do you have any advice for me as I embark on this process? Many, many Lovefraud readers have realized to their horror that they've had a child or children with a sociopath. Once you realize that your fo …

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Connecticut parents say court-ordered expenses bankrupt them

January 5, 2014 // by Donna Andersen// 3 Comments

In an article for Washington Times Communities, Lovefraud reader Anne Stevenson writes that Connecticut parents allege they are being forced to hire court appointed vendors such as psychologists and guardians. In 2013, a group of parents complained to the Legislature that these vendors were bankrupting them through their questionable billing practices. One guardian ad litem allegedly charged $40,000, but billing records indicated she spent very little time with the child she represented. A task force established to assess Connecticut's family courts disagreed with the parents and determined that an audit of the court's books and contracts would be unnecessary. Anne invites Lovefraud …

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Donna Andersen on Here’s the absolutely best way to protect yourself from sociopaths: “Truthmatters – excellent, excellent points. Even when we notice our instincts warning us, the sociopaths often try to convince us…”
truthmatters on Here’s the absolutely best way to protect yourself from sociopaths: “I would like to add a caution to all that ample disordered personalities know that your intuition will kick off…”
Donna Andersen on After the sociopath, proud of my healing: “Eleanor – Congratulations to you and all survivors. And thank you so much for your kind words. You, too, have…”
sept4 on Am I a sociopath magnet?: “Not me, I am one and done! My sociopath ex husband wrecked my life and I have never wanted to…”
sept4 on My psychopathic ex-husband is dead, and his pedophile brother is in prison: “Thank you Donna for sharing. My sociopath ex husband is a convicted criminal and continued his criminal activity after a…”