Editors Note: This SPATH Tale was submitted by the Lovefraud reader whom we'll call "Sawyer" 1. Started talking in October, she met me through my sister's Facebook. She saw a pic of me that my sister posted with my niece. She winked in the comments and added me on Facebook on October 2nd. 2. Month of October, started talking a little on Facebook, we did not talk a lot. Setup a date for her and I to go eat at Zukies asked if she liked Japanese food she said yes. She did not show up, said that she got into a fight with her mom and could not come. I talked to her told her I could come pick her up, she said she was embarrassed about where she lived and did not want me to see it. So I just said …
The psychopath wormed his way into my life
Editors Note: This SPATH Tale was submitted by the Lovefraud reader who goes by the name of"Thinking Girl". The names in this story have been changed. The sociopath was a man 18 years my junior. He targeted me while I lectured at the university where he did a degree. He was not my student. He would follow me around, stalk me practically until after a year he wore me down with his attentions. He was always helpful, but wanted my help as a mentor. I was going through a separation from my husband. The psychopath wormed his way into my life. He was charming and had an elaborate story about being the son of a billionaire from Texas. His name is Alan. He said he belonged to the Haliburton Oil f …
Back and forth, from the abusive husband to the sociopathic boyfriend
Editor's Note: This SPATH Tale was submitted by the Lovefraud reader who goes by the name "simpleme56." I came from an abusive childhood, an abusive marriage, and worked hard for over thirty years to heal, to educate myself to be able to understand the dynamics of my abuser and move forward in my life. I'm not 100% healed. But I came to terms with my life and began to move forward with education and professional jobs. And at 48 I met who I thought was the most incredible man I had ever met. I thought I was smart and was very careful waiting a year to see if the other shoe would drop and it didn't. I made a huge decision to finally walk away from a loveless, emotionally abusive marriage, te …
Back and forth, from the abusive husband to the sociopathic boyfriendRead More
The sociopath threw her sobbing into the front yard, but now she’s recovered and performing on stage
Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following letter from a reader whom we'll call "Avril." Names are changed. It's not possible for me to tell my entire story in a short blog, it'd need a whole book, but let me give you a bite-sized round up. This year marks 20 years since the blight entered our lives. I was a 32-year-old divorced mother of two small children, I was on holiday with my mother, my terminally ill father and my little sons. He was a brown-eyed handsome man who was running the bar at the resort. He was utterly charming and his eyes twinkled when he smiled. I had no chance. When I met him, though I was vulnerable I did have my own home, a secure part-time job and a reasonable …
Five Ways To Know He’s Not Here To Stay
By Nava Renek I should have suspected something was wrong last year during March Madness when we'd gone to a neighborhood bar to watch the Final Four. At half-time, a lively woman with short gray hair in a pixie cut wandered over and struck up a conversation with us. She seemed a little tipsy but was friendly enough, and as we continued talking, we agreed to meet her next door at another bar where she claimed a good band was playing. She said she was planning her 60th birthday, and after a few more shots of tequila, I had the feeling she was trying to pick us up. When she finally leaned into me and asked if we were monogamous, I answered “yes.” My partner said: “no.” We didn't take her up on …
If you’re a domestic abuse survivor, a researcher wants to know about your experience
Hello. My name is Courtney Humeny and I am a PhD candidate in Cognitive Science at Carleton University in Ottawa, Canada. I am carrying out an online study on survivors of romantic relationships with psychopathic partners. If you are interested in learning more please see the details below: Who we are recruiting The “Emotion, resilience, and post-traumatic growth in domestic abuse survivors” study investigates the outcome of being in an abusive romantic relationship. We are looking for participants (aged over 18) who identify as being in a prior heterosexual abusive romantic relationship. Abusive experiences may include verbal/ emotional abuse (i.e., bullying, manipulation), coercion (i.e., …
If you’re a domestic abuse survivor, a researcher wants to know about your experienceRead More
After a superficial two-year courtship, calling it quits
Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call "Annalise." Experts say date 2 years before you can fully know someone, so here's my story: Despite pouring over these websites and reading blog after blog to educate myself and heal myself, I've let another unsuspected sociopath into my life, or maybe I've know all along. So the first sociopath was an 8 month roller coaster with red flags everywhere, despite his coming off a 20 year marriage with a 15 year management job. He was on the higher end of the scale. And despite the stability with his first marriage and job: he truly was the Devil's child and it haunts me to this day. This other guy that I dated …
After a superficial two-year courtship, calling it quitsRead More
He was either the most incredible person I ever met, or a deplorable monster
Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call "Adelaide." Names are changed. I met Joe at a bar. It was the first time I ever went out alone. I was forcing myself to do new things on my own. Trying to prove to myself I did not need a man beside me to do the things I wanted to do. After I ordered my drink I started to feel uncomfortable. I noticed a jukebox and thought it would give me some comfort to hear some music I enjoy. So, I went to put in my selections. When I turned back around I noticed someone sitting in my chair. All my belongings had been pushed to the side. But my drink remained right where I left it. I immediately got angry ... wrinkled my …
He was either the most incredible person I ever met, or a deplorable monsterRead More
It’s like the authorities are all assisting my sociopathic ex in the fraud
Editor's note: The following was written by the Lovefraud reader who posts as "Mother.Love." Married him and had 2 children. After the second child we decided I could stay home as his construction business was doing well. During that time, we remodeled a home, I was diagnosed with Breast Cancer and survived twice and raised 2 children with learning disabilities. He wanted to build a new home and he became involved with a "spec" house. Unbeknownst to me he took out all the equity in the first house, lied to me about paying our taxes for 5 years, refused to set me up with a retirement account but he had one, didn't pay bills for 3 years, emptied all his accounts, was cheating on me while I was …
It’s like the authorities are all assisting my sociopathic ex in the fraudRead More
How do you explain why you stayed with a sociopath?
Editor's note: The following was written by the Lovefraud reader who posts as "Seekeroflight." How do you explain why you stayed To someone who saw how badly she treated you How exhausted you were Stressed How do you admit that you saw the monster early on And yet you stayed Because the monster was willing to lie To save face To threaten, intimidate How do you explain that you chose to stay With a monster who shouted, as she kicked your friend out, Shouted to the cops and half the neighborhood That he was a "faggot and has AIDS" He doesn't...but it doesn't matter You aren't that kind of person How do you admit that you stayed With a monster who said At the dining room table That she had …
How do you explain why you stayed with a sociopath?Read More