How to recognize and recover from everyday sociopaths - narcissists

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Father allegedly kept teen stowaway from his mother for eight years

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Yahya Abdi, the teen who survived the 5 ½ hour flight in a jet  wheel well, despite extreme cold and low oxygen levels, has left Hawaii and returned to California. A relative said the boy's father was denied access. Abdi, a 15-year-old boy originally from Somalia, has not seen his mother in eight years. Abdilahi Yusuf, Abdi's father, allegedly took Abdi and his brother and sister to the United States without his mother's permission. The boy  had been told by his father that his mother was dead. Abdi recently found out that his mother was not dead; she was living in a remote refugee camp in eastern Ethiopia. With this news he hopped a fence at San Jose International Airport and climbed in …

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LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: The only hope I have is that Karma exists

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Editor's Note: This Letter to Lovefraud was submitted by Lovefaud reader whom we'll call “Bessy.” A "relationship" that spanned one year will take me a lifetime, no doubt, to even try to comprehend. From my readings, which have been countless, I know there will never be "closure." This person I didn't even "invite" into my life, effortlessly wormed his way in very quickly and drove me to lose 80 pounds and become suicidal. In the blink of an eye. I would not even normally associate with this type of person he would never be in my circle of friends. Right off the bat, I had glaring red flags and ignored or explained every single one of them away Be more adventurous, I told myself. Give t …

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LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: Reader needs advice to protect her kids

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Editor's Note: The Lovefraud reader who goes by the name of “NomorePTSD” has a request. Can  any Lovefraud readers  offer her any advice or suggestions?  This is “NomorePTSD.” My blog post, LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: Escaping my mother, the sociopath, appeared on Lovefraud in June of 2013. I talked about my healing from flashbacks that were a result of my childhood and beginning adulthood relationship with my mother, a sociopath who stalked me for 18 years, motivated largely by envy. We are doing total No Contact, and have essentially erased ourselves from the map of her world. Now I have a bit of a dilemma with privacy. My husband and I moved to a new place, bought our home in a LLC and our ca …

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Beyond The Grave – Haunted By A Sociopathic Parent

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After being physically, mentally, and emotionally abused by sociopathic parents, I often wondered when the trauma would stop. Would it get better as they aged? Or would I be relentlessly tormented until they passed away? The answer:  neither.  After their passing, their legacy continued to haunt me. My father was the violent, malevolent sociopath.  Yet, my mother caused by far more pain.  You see, my mother was a master of deceit.   If you offended her (or worse, threatened to expose her), she would effortlessly spin webs of lies around you.  Incite her anger, and suddenly you are Alice in Wonderland - sucked into her rabbit hole where nothing is at it seems, wondering what just happe …

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Sociopaths, Assessments, and Court–What’s the Point?

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Last week in Hard to See a Psychopath, I dedicated my post to seeing psychopaths/sociopaths more clearly. I talked about the need for assessments—meaning more training for more clinicians—as a place to start in our quest to "make things better." But what's next? Let's say you're in the family court system. Does an assessment make a difference? Why start there? I thought hard about this all week. Because for the past decade or two, I've lived in a space where I know that my ex is hurting people, but I've been silenced or belittled or ignored in most arenas when I try to talk about it. And I've imagined, many times, that if people just knew the truth, it would make a difference. This wee …

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Why I wrote ‘The Devil’s Opus’

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By Margaux Mannion Brown  Editor's note: Margaux Mannion Brown is the pen name for a Lovefraud reader. Ideas for The Devil's Opus began to emerge when I became fascinated with sociopathic personalities. This occurred when I discovered that one of my close friends had married one. Everyone liked Joe. He was charming, flattering, and helpful. So helpful, that through his career as an investment broker, he was able to scam hundreds of thousands of dollars out of his clients, friends and family. Most of the money was lost on gambling. The rest of it went on big houses, fancy cars, and expensive vacations he pretended to afford. Things fell apart for Joe when people began to demand their i …

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From one university sex scandal to another

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In December of 2012, a female Florida State freshman reported that she was sexually assaulted by James Winston, Heisman-Trophy winning quarterback of the Seminoles. Winston was never charged. The police claim it was due to lack of evidence, although a New York Times report says there was plenty, including DNA, witnesses, and a secretly recorded video of a portion of the incident. The incident did not become public until almost a full year later, in November of 2013. Florida State did not say whether administration officials, including President Eric Barron, were aware of the accusations against Winston. Penn State University, which endured the Jerry Sandusky scandal, in which the …

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Craigslist: Avoiding Scams and Crooks

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In 2013, a Pittsburgh man bilked 194 people out of $53,000 by advertising fake concert tickets on Craigslist. In 2012, a Las Vegas Craigslist seller was nearly robbed of his luxury RV when he was contacted by a  buyer wanting to pay in full using Paypal.  It sounded good, until she said she was in a hurry and needed the RV ASAP.  Luckily the man hesitated, narrowly missing becoming the woman's next victim. In January 2014, a Georgia man sold his Ipad on Craigslist, only to find out the cash he received was counterfeit.  During January alone, he became the 3rd victim of Craiglist scams in the city of Augusta. Craigslist, for the most part, is a convenient and inexpensive way to sell goo …

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Hard to See a Psychopath

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I'll start with one man who has dedicated his life to teaching others how to assess and clearly identify psychopaths. Here's part of the bio from his website. “Robert Hare is Emeritus Professor of Psychology, University of British Columbia, where he has taught and conducted research for more than four decades, and President of Darkstone Research Group Ltd., a forensic research and consulting firm. He has devoted most of his academic career to the investigation of psychopathy, its nature, assessment, and implications for mental health and criminal justice. He is the developer of the Psychopathy Checklist-Revised (PCL-R) and a co-author of its derivatives, the Psychopathy Checklist: Screen …

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Lovefraud con man William Allen Jordan – AKA Liam Allen – busted by his latest victim in New Jersey

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William Allen Jordan is one of the most dangerous psychopaths I've ever come across. I've spoken to at least four of his victims, and he takes mental manipulation and gaslighting to a level far beyond what most garden-variety psychopaths can accomplish. Jordan convinced multiple women in the UK that he was a CIA agent. In fact, he was married to two women simultaneously, and had both of them believing that the other was nothing but an agent working under cover. Mary Turner Thomson wrote a book about her experience called, The Bigamist. Dr. Liane Leedom studied William Jordan for her scientific paper, "Did He Ever Love Me?": A qualitative study of life with a psychopathic husband. Jordan …

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