Are you starting to think that you should get out of your relationship — but you have no idea how to begin extricating yourself? If so, this course, presented by Dr. Amber Ault, takes you, step-by-step, through the process of gathering support for your escape to making your move — and dealing with the chaos that may follow. About this course You're not happy with your intimate relationship — you're feeling misunderstood, exploited, manipulated and devalued. But it's complicated — finances, kids, social pressures, not to mention your own confusion. How do you sort out what to do? The Five Step Exit course offers you a structured model to help you decide whether to hang in or get out. …
After getting rid of one sociopath, another sociopath shows up
I've heard from multiple Lovefraud readers over the years who were annoyed, angry, horrified. These readers had finally realized what they were dealing with—a sociopath. They extricated themselves from the relationships and had no further contact with the disordered individuals. And what happened? Another sociopath came into their lives. The readers asked: What is going on? Why can't they leave me alone? Am I a sociopath magnet? The answer is, not necessarily. Following are some observations to add perspective to the situation. Millions of sociopaths These disordered individuals are everywhere. As long as we're living on this planet, we face the possibility of running into t …
After getting rid of one sociopath, another sociopath shows upRead More
Sociopaths enjoy the game of destroying others–enabled by the courts, they find ways to keep the game alive
Every week, a chapter of my book,"Husband, Liar, Sociopath: How He Lied, Why I Fell For It & The Painful Lessons Learned" (available via Amazon.com, just click on the title or book cover) will be published here on Lovefraud. To read prior chapters, use the links at the bottom of the post. I’ve also just released a new ebook titled Narcissists, SOCIOPATHS & Wolves: Lessons From Little Red Riding Hood. (Just click here to find it on Amazon.com Narcissists SOCIOPATHS & Wolves.) Chapter 55: Paul’s Way Between his father’s ongoing behavior, the loss of Ella when Daniel needed her most, his sister leaving to live with Paul and Linda, and my work to get our house staged and so …
My uncle is a sociopath — how do I protect our family?
Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following letter from a reader whom we'll call, "Trisha17." My uncle (mother’s side) is a sociopath. I’ve known since my first memory of him as a child, I just saw it in his mannerisms, heard it in his voice, saw it in his lack of genuine care for others. I just instinctually knew. I have always found him to be totally fake. My father is a highly intelligent and relatively benign grandiose narcissist. I have narcissistic traits but am definitely an empath. I have clued in to sociopaths and have been taken aback that no one else sees it. I remember when my grandma was having a serious surgery he went to get a haircut while she was under the kni …
My uncle is a sociopath — how do I protect our family?Read More
Devin Kelley, Texas church shooter, exhibited a pattern of psychopathic behavior, but no one saw the whole picture
The stories coming out of the massacre in the First Baptist Church in Sutherland Springs, Texas, are horrific and heartbreaking. The shooter, Devin Patrick Kelley, 26, walked into the church dressed in combat gear and killed congregants in the pews. One survivor reported that Kelley became enraged that children were scared, and shot them multiple times. Kelley executed 26 people that day, including nine children. Eight members of one extended family were killed. Twenty more churchgoers were injured. Authorities release IDs of Texas church victims, on ABCnews.go.com Afterwards, of course, everyone is asking, “How did this happen?” “Were there any warning signs?” The answer is YES! There …
Mandy Friedman, MS LPC NCC: The True Sources of Trauma
Editor's note: Lovefraud is pleased to introduce a new therapist in the Lovefraud Professional Resources Guide, Mandy Friedman, MS, LPC, NCC. Mandy is located in Cincinnati, Ohio, and specializes in helping survivors of toxic and exploitative personalities. By Mandy Friedman, MS, LPC, NCC My interest in learning about exploitative personalities began as I was trying to make sense of experiences I was having in my personal life. Then, as a mental health counselor, I began connecting dots in therapy sessions as clients worked to overcome painful experiences from their past. A large percentage of clients come to therapy to address anxiety, depression, unhealthy behaviors, difficulty with …
Mandy Friedman, MS LPC NCC: The True Sources of TraumaRead More
Grooming: How the religious and cultural ideas of my childhood conditioned me to accept pain and abuse
When I said that “god was my first abuser,” at our regular meeting of Parents of Sexually Abused Children, no one sucked in their breath or exhibited shock. A tough group, no one even blinked an eye. That week’s topic, “Grooming” was assigned by Aidan, our lead Social Worker who, while she listened to us, liked to re-shape lifeless paper clips into unconventional characters that she’d stand up on an enormous art canvas she’d been creating for years and years. I shared with my group that, in Grade 1, when I learned that god ordered his own kid, a boy, to save the world, I instantly thought of Gordie, my teenaged brother. As Sister Brebeuf pointed to a bleeding figure nailed to a crucifix …
12 Reasons to forgive yourself for falling for the sociopath
Once I figured out that my entire relationship was a scam, the person I was most angry with was myself. I really beat myself up. Why did I fall for the lies? Why was I such a chump? Sound familiar? Since my disastrous experience with my sociopathic ex-husband, James Montgomery, one of the most important things that I've learned about tangling with sociopaths is that we shouldn't be so hard on ourselves for believing them. We are not stupid. We are normal, empathetic people who didn't stand a chance against skilled predators, and here's a dozen reasons why: 1 . No one told us about sociopaths. In school, church, college or even magazine articles, we never learned that there are …
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‘I Love You’ from the perspective of a narcissist
Editor's note: The following article was contributed by the Lovefraud reader "macus1529," who has written in the Lovefraud Forum about her experience with a disordered relationship. ‘I love you’ are some of the most powerful words one person can say to another, and while their meaning is universal, sometimes the person saying them can’t grasp this meaning. This letter is to the unfortunate many who have fallen in love with someone who will always love themselves more than they can love another. Written from the view of the narcissist hell bent on keeping that person under their thumb. Dear Codependent Partner, What I’m about to say is not something I’d ever say or admit (to you), …
Sociopaths are evil, dark, and soulless
Every week, a chapter of my book, "Husband, Liar, Sociopath: How He Lied, Why I Fell For It & The Painful Lessons Learned" (available via Amazon.com, just click on the title or book cover) will be published here on Lovefraud. To read prior chapters, please see the links at the bottom of the post. I’ve also just released a new ebook titled Narcissists, SOCIOPATHS & Wolves: Lessons From Little Red Riding Hood. (Just click here to find it on Amazon.com Narcissists SOCIOPATHS & Wolves.) Chapter 54: Just Plain Mean I flew back East to be with my family. My mother survived her heart attack but was altered permanently by the event—physically, emotionally, and cognitively. Due t …