Well where do I start? I guess right from the beginning. 1999 I was 31 when I met the most handsome charming man in the world, I had travelled well, I used to be a holiday rep abroad, so I thought I was a pretty good judge of character…….. I met him on a night out with friends, on a Saturday Night, we talked all night long, I even went back to his place (no funny business) and we talked all night there too!! We arranged out 1st date the following Mon, what a great night we had, he even told people that we were on our honeymoon, such a laugh as is was our very 1st date!! Things progressed very very quickly we met in June, engaged by Sept and living together by October, and it wa …
After the sociopath: Courage is fear that said its prayers
Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following letter from a reader whom we'll call "Carol18." I’m a 62-year-old woman who left a sociopath husband three years ago. I went online to meet who I thought was my dream man. He was charming; the second date he said I will treat you like no other man has ever treated you before. That was the only true thing he ever said to me. He was romantic my Prince Charming, bought flowers, cards. Then after I fell in love, he tells me he had cancer, had a job as a cook (profile said chef) and financially secure. His car broke. He was sobbing, babe how will I get to work? Well now my savings is drained $3,200, helping him paid off title loans to help h …
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10 years of hope and heartbreak with a sociopathic woman, Part 3
Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call "Trevor." Read Part 1 and Part 2. About two months into this and things seemed great with her. We went on a date and when we got back to my place she asked if I had noticed this old shipping crate that they used for decoration in the bar we had been to. I told her yes, and she asked if I seen one in my travels to get one for her as she had been looking for one for her home. I told her I happened to have a few in my flea market items and went to my shop to get her one. When I returned with the crate she loved it, was just what she had been looking for so I gave it to her, We went inside my place and out of …
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10 years of hope and heartbreak with a sociopathic woman, Part 2
Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call "Trevor." Read Part 1. Part 3 will be published tomorrow. Needless to say, contact between us stopped for a long time. A year went by and one day I opened my e-mail and there was a letter from her. My father had passed away the week before and she had read it in the paper and was saying sorry for my loss and for all she had done. She added she hoped I didn't hate her and that she missed us talking the way we once did. I fell for it. I replied and told her I didn't hate her, that I missed her too and before long it was on again. This time her struggle was with the wedding that was coming up. She had agreed …
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10 years of hope and heartbreak with a sociopathic woman, Part 1
Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call "Trevor." This is Part 1 of 3. Part 2 will be published tomorrow. I became involved over 10 years ago. We met while on a wine tour, she was with another man and he was with her on this tour. She approached me at the bar, asked me where my girlfriend was. I told her I didn't have one at the time and asked her where the boyfriend was. She replied, I sent him to the bus so I could talk to you. I made an excuse to leave and did my best to ignore it the rest of the night. A few weeks later at a wedding reception I see her again. She's a very beautiful woman and was dressed to kill. Again she's with the same …
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Language habits to help me remember that my ex was abnormal
Editor's note: Three years ago, Lovefraud posted a story that we received from a reader whom we called, "Maura." Read it here: "After 30 years with a sociopath, she's now having the time of her life." Maura is now about 70 years old and just sent Lovefraud an update. She included one of her recovery strategies, which she was graciously willing to share with Lovefraud readers. I wanted you to know that I gave up on "being friends" with the ex, and on trying to rescue the other victim (the main one; I'm sure there were others I did not know about). There have been many happy experiences in my new, free life. I am in a positive relationship, but I set strong boundaries and I resist any d …
Language habits to help me remember that my ex was abnormalRead More
He got everything he could from me, and then discarded me
Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following letter from a reader whom we'll call "Emilie18." I met him in October on a dating site. He was 4 years younger than me – 59. His profile picture showed a rugged, good-looking middle aged man. His profile said he said he was ex military, ex truck driver, had a stroke and was losing his sight but wanting to travel. We chatted on the site for a week - he claimed he moved to my state to live with his brother after a nasty divorce 6 months before and had two married, adult kids living in Kentucky. He lived in a town 100 miles away. He wrote every day, then after a week, I gave him my number. He had a charming southern accent. I met him at a r …
He got everything he could from me, and then discarded meRead More
While I was at work, my fiancé was coming in my home, packing up his stuff, preparing to ghost me
Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call "Marjorie18." I was engaged for three years to a very handsome retired master sergeant in the Air Force. He had two boys the same age as my two boys. We lived together in my home until this Good Friday, March 30, 2018. He had been moving things out of my house into a storage unit because after his divorce, naturally, he had a lot of stuff that he needed to store and most of that came to my house. He had several vehicles, including a car trailer full of stuff, and then my garage was full of his stuff. So when he started moving things into storage, it was under the guise of wanting to put a collectible …
Her daughter’s wedding should be a time of joy, but her ex is causing havoc
Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following letter from the reader who posts as "Elle." In 2014, my youngest daughter and I got a restraining order against my husband at the time due to violent rages and terrifying behavior he was exhibiting. Of course he would profess to our older 2 daughters he did nothing and we were lying … this is a man who NEVER took any responsibility for his behavior and was then and still is a pathological liar. At a divorce proceeding in April 2017, in spite of the restraining order in effect, he violated the order and I went to the police. He came after my daughter and I in the parking lot in a terrifying, arms flailing, cocky and belligerent manner sa …
Her daughter’s wedding should be a time of joy, but her ex is causing havocRead More
LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: Since this experience, I’ve been afraid to love again
Editor's note: The following letter was sent by a Lovefraud reader whom we'll call "Shania." Names have been changed. My comments are at the end of the letter. I'm a 20-year-old girl and I had an experience with a sociopath, or so I think he was one. This traumatic experience actually gave me post-traumatic stress disorder. A few years ago, in my senior year of high school, I started to talk to this boy in my class named Mark. Everyone loved him; he was the most popular guy in my school. He was really good at talking to people, had the charm, very funny, always knew what to say. I first noticed a red flag before we started dating. Out of nowhere, Mark came over to me and cut off a …
LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: Since this experience, I’ve been afraid to love againRead More