Letters to Lovefraud and Spath Tales

Editor’s note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we’ll call Laura24. She was shocked by the lies her boyfriend told her over their years together, even though she lived them.I spent 12 years in a relationship with a sociopath. In the 10 years that we lived together, he had convinced me he owned his own business, had a bachelor’s degree, and that he was financially stable.Stunning revelationsSome of the revelations that still shock me today even though I lived it:As far as I'm aware, I'm the only person he had ever dated other than the 18-year-old girl he was sleeping with. I'm not sure how much she knows about him.Learn more: Maybe you're not codependent — you're traum …

Shocked by the lies, even though I lived themRead More

Editor’s note: Lovefraud received the following email from a reader whom we’ll call Charlotte24. She is so terrorized by the sociopath that she says she is “running for my life.”I am about to lose my freedom. He has destroyed my life and is still trying. I have received 4 CDVs (criminal domestic violence charges) in one year. He has so many other prior charges — assaults on females — and CDVs, including one assault charge with me, because he cut my clothes off me and left me on side of road 3 hours away from home and never came back to get me. He has come and hunt me down and he would be crying and begging for me to go back knowing that I have a no contact order with him. I would be dumb …

Running for my lifeRead More

Editor's note: This Lovefraud reader, whom we’ll all “Marily24,” describes the mental, physical and emotional abuse in her marriage to a sociopath.I experienced mental, physical, and emotional abuse in my marriage. I thought he was made in heaven for me but found out he was the devil all along. I did see a red flag right away in the beginning. But I dismissed it because I didn't know quite how to take it. He had called me one night in the middle of the night. All drunk and wanted to see me supposedly. I had to work the next morning— I managed a hotel. So I got out of bed and got dressed, and then tried to call him to find out where he was at. Some hotel with this family. This is wha …

Mental, physical, and emotional abuse in my marriageRead More

UPDATED FOR 2024. Editor's note: This story was submitted by the Lovefraud reader who we'll call “Margie.” She was still in love with the jerk she met — even after learning he was a criminal.One night I went to a bar by myself (but always knew someone there). I sat at the bar next to this lady I knew and started talking to her. Well Steve (my ex-sociopath—not his real name) was sitting next to her talking to her. I thought he was kind of cute so started flirting.  He actually said to me that night, "I think I like you better," like he had his sights on my friend first. He bought me a flower and all my drinks the rest of the night. Well that should have been my first and only red flag to …

LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: I was still in love with the jerkRead More

Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a woman who we'll call “Trista.” She tells her story of being dismissed with a shrug.I met the man who has been my husband for 30 years in a language school. He was serious, but could be funny, a bit shy, but also had a way with words. He had beautiful eyes and lots of girls were in love with him. I was no exception, but it was me he chose to go out with.The relationship soon took off and we were a pair. Those first days were good; I had no idea I was dealing with a sociopath. When I took him to meet my mother, however, when things were very serious between us, she said that she thought he needed some “help.” I dismissed it.I did real …

LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: I was dismissed with a shrugRead More

Editor's note: The following story was submitted by a reader who we'll call “Lia.” She shares her experience of how she got away from the sociopath.For years I felt like my life was thrown in a blender and chopped up in little pieces and those pieces included my heart, my career, my health, my sanity, my friends and my family.My first encounter with the sociopath was at NYU medical center's ER, while my 3-year-old son was being looked at for a bump in the head. This young intern doctor took a lot of interest in me and in my son's well being. After recently having ended my marriage, it felt good that a guy would become so enraptured by me. At the time I was legally separated from my husband, a …

LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: How I got away from the sociopathRead More

I've had two female sociopaths, narcissists, or psychopaths — whichever they are, coming after me for almost 18 months.  They are simply other tenants in my apartment building and I am their "chosen one." We were never friends, in fact other than the abuse, they don't know me and vice versa.  It's been absolute mental torture to endure. They have slandered me, have had me ostracized here, lied about me, made countless police calls about me, tell others that I hurt dogs, rumor that I once "tried to strangle" a dog, that I stalk, follow, entrap, corner, harass, grab, and even was alleged to have "caused" one of them to have a fall from which she needed emergency back s …

Terrorized by two sociopathic female neighborsRead More