Letters to Lovefraud and Spath Tales Archives | Page 47 of 56 | Lovefraud | Escape sociopaths

LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: Still lying after all these years

February 2, 2013 // by Lovefraud Reader// 16 Comments

Editor's note: The following essay was written by the Lovefraud reader whom we'll call “Ella Mae.” I wish I would have read the signs early on and went with my gut 6 years ago. My story is this. We have been in a relationship for six years. Two of those six years we were married. We decided we would get married because I got pregnant. I thought that he would change and we would live happily ever after-- but that wasn't the case. When we were dating there were many red flags but I chose to ignore them. Every time he was caught in a lie, he would have an explanation. Me being naive, I thought how can someone possibly make a lie for everything. I gave him the benefit of the doubt and bel …

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LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: Marriage, betrayal, and no guilt whatsoever

January 23, 2013 // by Donna Andersen// 151 Comments

Editor's note: The following was written by a Lovefraud reader whom we'll call "Ruby." She wants to share her story because she is finding it hard to move on with her life. She lives in Europe and English is not her first language. When we got engage he come across really nice and kind person. Before i decided to get engage I have told him that I want this relationship based on honesty and truth and he said yeh I want the same. He come across as mummy little baby boy, which was not a problem for me, since I believe that person who love and respect his mother will do respect and care for me as well. He used to often say to me that after I get married to him, I will be the happiest woman on …

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LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: Solutions to our pain

January 16, 2013 // by Lovefraud Reader// 14 Comments

Editor's note: The following article is by the Lovefraud reader NewLife43. RE: The Love Fraud article Back in Control of the Panic Buttons by “Adelade,” posted January 13, 2013. This article rang so true for me. In fact, this one triggered the most physical reaction that I've had in a long time. Not just crying, I was literally feeling panic and upset in my gut, my chest, my shoulders. I was such a mess I felt myself losing my grip on reality! So much of what she wrote about the money situations and the birthday/holiday things in her life rang like the loud bongs of church bells inside my head. The noise was deafening! It brought back all those feelings of "being pushed and rushed in …

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LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: Are cats sociopaths?

December 22, 2012 // by Lovefraud Reader// 102 Comments

Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following from the Lovefraud reader who posts as NewLife43. I not only read Lovefraud to help me with the backlash from my 8-year relationship with my spath. I also read an interesting blog written by and for sociopaths, answering some of their questions, presenting criteria about what makes a sociopath what s/he is. It's very enlightening, particularly when I am sorely missing my ex-spath and need to remind myself why we are no longer together. Since it's on the Internet, the spaths are surprisingly honest. Sometimes, the posts can be very chilling, when they are honestly posting about the way they think, causing a shiver to run down my spine that I e …

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LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: I guess something good came out of this story

December 6, 2012 // by Lovefraud Reader// 27 Comments

Editor's note: The following essay was written by the Lovefraud reader who posts as "Ms_Snowhite." I want to share with the readers at Lovefraud something that happened to me tonight, when I woke up in the middle of the night and I couldn't fall back to sleep. You know, it was one of those moments when you suddenly wake up, your mind is clear of everything and you start thinking. So I was lying on the bed thinking about the spath again and how there would probably never be justice for the things he has done to me, and then, I had started to think about other people that had hurt me a lot by intention in the past too. You know, friends that had betrayed me, co-workers that were …

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LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: Whole relationships documented in phones is not proof of authenticity

December 5, 2012 // by Lovefraud Reader// 82 Comments

Editor's note: The following article was written by a Lovefraud reader who uses the name "Transcendence." I had not received so much confirmation or documentation of being in a “relationship” before. The biggest problem was that he managed to rarely see me in person and he had a habit of cancelling and sometimes even “FORGETTING” dates. My first intoxicating Romantic Narcissist occurred 4 years ago and I had never experienced a suitor so sexy, seductive, intelligent, well written with poetic prose and boyishly handsome with seeming innocence. I remember waiting desperately for a return txt ”¦ or phone call ”¦ obsessively ”¦ this man could send me to heaven or throw me into the black abyss. …

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LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: Cognitive Dissonance and the Psychopath

November 25, 2012 // by Lovefraud Reader// 86 Comments

Editor's note: The following article was submitted by the Lovefraud reader who posts as "Betsybugs." The term cognitive dissonance is used to describe the feeling of discomfort and confusion that results from holding two conflicting beliefs. When there is a discrepancy between beliefs or beliefs and behaviors, something must change in order to eliminate or reduce the mental conflict. Psychopaths use cognitive dissonance to entangle victims, to keep victims confused and docile and to create pain. My story is a story of cognitive dissonance. My cognitive dissonance began in childhood when my father would go into rages, chase one of his daughters into a corner and beat the living daylights …

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LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: I lost myself in the relationship with a sociopath

November 14, 2012 // by Lovefraud Reader// 83 Comments

Editor's note: The following article was submitted by a reader who writes as "Buffalo Girl." The boy across the street. I remember him back in the late 70's. My family had moved into the new neighborhood. I was 12. He was the popular 13-year-old who always hung out with the cool boys who were years older than him. And they seemed to idolize him. I remember the second day in my new catholic grammar school ”¦”¦ me, the new girl, and him already there for years. But the teachers were fed up with him. Second day of school. The head nun and a few teachers surrounded him in the hall. They were already frustrated and ganged up on him. Saying they've had enough and were not going to take anoth …

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LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: The sociopath didn’t take it all from us

November 9, 2012 // by Lovefraud Reader// 14 Comments

Editor's note: The following article was submitted by the Lovefraud reader who posts as "Adelade." I've experienced so much personal loss as a result of my second marriage that I don't know if I'll ever recover. I lost my belongings, all of my inheritance, and I nearly lost my will to live. When I returned home and the hot water wasn't coming out of the spigot, I took my little flashlight down to the basement - dirt and gravel floor, unheated, and housing a dead furnace. I opened the door to the basement and was met with a wall of warm, moist air and the sound of running water. It was 27 degrees, outside, and 37 degrees inside the shell of the dwelling where I'm currently liv …

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LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: Lured and caught by a sociopath

November 4, 2012 // by Donna Andersen// 92 Comments

Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following article from a reader called "Makemenew2012." The Lure I met my second husband, an African immigrant, on a social media site in early January of this year. Mr. C (as I'll refer to him) connected with me through a mutual acquaintance and began sending me e-mails every day. At first, his messages seemed rather innocent— Mr. C asked how my day was going, what the weather was like, etc. But after a few days, he began fishing for information, inquiring about my husband and children. The first time, I ignored his question and responded on my own behalf. The next time, I replied that I didn't have a husband or children. And that was his cue to st …

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