New Lovefraud Continuing Education Webinar! Obtaining Injunctions Against a Sociopath Presented by Megan M. Lyons, Esq. Tuesday, Aug. 1 • 8 - 9 pm ET • $25 The sociopath won't leave you alone. He or she is harassing you, stalking you, perhaps threatening you. You want a court order to make the abuse stop. How do you get it? But even more importantly, should you get it? These are the issues that attorney Megan M. Lyons will address in her new Lovefraud CE webinar, Obtaining Injunctions Against a Sociopath. If you're thinking about pursuing a restraining order, you need this information. About the presenter Megan M. Lyons, Esq., is an attorney based in Florida, with offices in Orlando and …
If we want something different, we need to do something different
By Amber Ault, Ph.D., MSW I’m fond of this axiom: “If you want something different from what you’ve had, you need to do something different from what you’ve done.” Here’s an important corollary: Doing something different will, at first, feel strange. When we envision something different for ourselves and begin to practice creating it, it’s important to prepare to receive it. Otherwise, new possibilities will be assimilated by the powerful machinery of old patterns and we’ll continue to feel stuck. It’s not enough to want something different, or even to envision it. In order to create something different, we must release the barriers — often unconscious — that stand in its way. We need to l …
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If you are being stalked, here’s advice from a woman who’s lived it
January is National Stalking Awareness Month. Vicki Kuper of Iowa was stalked for years by her former romantic partner, Mike Bonert, and has successfully held him accountable so far. Vicki went to the authorities and got a No Contact order which wasn't easy. Bonert proceeded to violate it 24 times. Vicki then was able to have Bonert prosecuted, which also wasn't easy. He was convicted and sentenced to 11 years in prison, then an additional 10 years for his fifth stalking charge. He appealed his conviction, but still served four and a half years. The Iowa Court of Appeals recently affirmed Bonert's stalking conviction. Bonert is already out on parole, but he must wear a GPS ankle bracelet …
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Divorcing a Narcissist: Tina Swithin, author of OneMomsBattle.com, offers “Advice from the Battlefield”
[youtube_sc url="https://youtu.be/8y3K9ucP99s" title="Divorcing%20a%20Narcissist:%20Tina%20Swithin%20offers%20Advice%20from%20the%20Battlefield"] If you married someone whom you now believe is a narcissist, and you are divorcing, know this: You are headed for a really rough ride, especially if you have children with this person. Tina Swithin, founder of OneMomsBattle.com and author of the Divorcing a Narcissist series, has been there. She endured her ex-husband's smear campaign, court officials who didn't understand personality disorders, and two custody evaluations. It took years, but she finally succeeded protecting her children and is living in peace. Now, she coaches men and women who …
Q&A with attorney Megan Lyons, an expert in court battles with sociopaths
Megan Lyons, Esq., who is based in Sarasota, Florida, is the newest member of the Lovefraud Professional Resources Guide. What experience have you had dealing with sociopaths or other disordered personalities—personally, professionally, or both? I have dealt with pathological sociopaths for most of my life in my personal experience, romantically and in the professional arena. As a result of these life changing experiences and relationships, I committed years to studying sociopathy and the recovery from such insidious and sadistic abuse. How do you go about helping clients who have tangled with a sociopath? Because of my personal experience with sociopaths, I am able to provide genuine em …
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The ABC’s of choosing a non-toxic mate
By Amber Ault, Ph.D., MSW Partner choice is important to all of us. Toxic relationship survivors often avoid opening themselves to new relationships because of their fear of choosing a partner who will bring more devastation and drama into their lives. Many of us learn to watch for the warning signs that a person is a psychopath, narcissist, or other toxic type, but we aren't certain about the positive characteristics that indicate someone is good partner material. In addition to screening out difficult people, we need to learn how to screen in good matches. To help with this, I've come up with an easy-to-remember screening tool. It summarizes insights from years of academic research and …
Video: Dr. Karin Huffer on dealing with a coercive controller in court
[youtube_sc url="https://youtu.be/WaSFfosRoKo" title="Surviving%20Court%20When%20You%27re%20Traumatized"] You've been traumatized, and now you must face the person who traumatized you in court. Whether the case is divorce, child custody or some other litigation, you know that your opponent's objective isn't just to win the case. Your opponent will attempt to use legal procedures and the courts to crush you. How can you protect yourself? Surviving Court When You're Traumatized Part 1: How to protect yourself when you're facing a coercive controller Monday, October 17, 2016 • 8-9 pm EDT • $25 Part 2: How the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) can support you Tuesday, October 25, 2016 • 8-9 p …
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Invisible Intimate Partner Abuse and How to Manage Coercive Control in Court
By Dr. Karin Huffer — editor Wilene Gremain In recognition of Domestic Violence Awareness Month, here's a composite story drawn from my cases: I was a successful college educated thirty-something when I finally met my soul mate on a cruise ship to Alaska. Independent thinker, educated, ecology minded, career oriented, honest, he was almost the mirror image of myself as far as these qualities, two of a kind. We had it all. I was incredibly happy. Anything ”¦ we would do anything to show the love and respect we felt for each other. “Marry Me?” “You Bet!” After almost one year of marriage and closing in on our first Christmas together, I was at full throttle to make the best ever Christma …
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7 Social Science Insights that Will Help You Understand Why It’s Not So Easy to “Just Get the Hell Out”
By Amber Ault, Ph.D. One of the many difficult questions survivors of toxic relationships ask themselves is “why is it so hard to leave someone who treats me so badly?” As rational people, we recognize that a relationship is extremely problematic and believe that the rational course of action would be just to stop the drama. And yet. And yet, this is usually harder than it sounds. While there are practical and logistical barriers to people exiting, the emotional resistance to leaving is usually present even when there aren't kids or property or business deals or divorce laws slowing us down. What accounts for this? Why is it so common? Social science has some insights that hel …
Help for Overcoming the Trauma of Facing the Abuser in Court
After suffering the trauma of domestic violence, many victims are terrified to face their abusers in court. The federal Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) can offer support, so in recognition of Domestic Violence Awareness Month, Lovefraud Continuing Education presents the online course, "Surviving Court When You're Traumatized" on Oct. 17 and 25, 2016. Domestic violence victims often suffer from anxiety, depression and post-traumatic stress disorder, explains Dr. Karin Huffer, an adjunct professor at the John Jay College of Criminal Justice and author of the course. When victims must appear in court with the abuser for divorce, child custody or other legal matters, their symptoms may …
Help for Overcoming the Trauma of Facing the Abuser in CourtRead More