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Sociopaths and family

You are here: Home / Archives for Sociopaths and family

LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: Vigorous campaign to portray me as angry and hostile

October 29, 2009 //  by Lovefraud Reader//  103 Comments

Editor's note: On April 15, 2009, we posted “Bob's” story—Leaning on his family while battling his wife. Well, the battle continues. Bob is asking the Lovefraud community for suggestions. I recently received the email below from my P ex-wife and wanted to share it with your readers. I would like someone to analyze this to get some insight and commentary on this situation. It is so reminiscent of what I have read on Lovefraud.com and in books and comes really without surprise; it just surprises me of the lengths she will go to try to falsely trash me in an effort to obtain custody of our kids. The allegations are either fabricated or extremely exaggerated. She has a knack for manipulating p …

LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: Vigorous campaign to portray me as angry and hostileRead More

Category: Female sociopaths, Letters to Lovefraud and Spath Tales, Sociopaths and family

ASK DR. LEEDOM: Why has my husband cut our daughters out of his life?

October 25, 2009 //  by Liane Leedom, M.D.//  92 Comments

This week we received the following letter from a reader of the blog. I wanted to share both the letter and my reaction to it with you: After 30 yrs of marriage and abuse, I have finally left my passive aggressive sociopathic narcissist husband. I have managed the No Contact fairly well, of course he is the KING of the silent treatment so it doesn't seem to bother him. What I simply do not understand is this: We have two daughters, ages 22 and 24. We USED to have a close family, the girls were close to their dad. However after they have witnessed him abusing me, they have had a few 'spats' with him lately. What completely baffles me, is that when I started the No Contact …

ASK DR. LEEDOM: Why has my husband cut our daughters out of his life?Read More

Category: Sociopaths and family

It Wasn’t You

September 10, 2009 //  by Steve Becker, LCSW//  187 Comments

(This post is meant for her, who knows who she is, and the rest of you, who know who you are. My use of “he” is for purposes of convenience; women, too, are capable of the behaviors and attitudes described. Copyright © 2009 by Steve Becker, LCSW) It wasn't you. It was him. I know you're not a black and white person (like he was). But sometimes it is black and white. And so this is the deal: It wasn't you. He wanted you to think it was you, when all along it was him. And you didn't fully want to believe it was him, either. Even now, perhaps in a corner of your heart, although it may conflict with your rational healing self, you may still not be entirely ready to believe that it wasn't you. …

It Wasn’t YouRead More

Category: Explaining the sociopath, Recovery from a sociopath, Sociopaths and family

LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: I am losing control as a parent

August 12, 2009 //  by Lovefraud Reader//  100 Comments

Editor's note: A Lovefraud reader, who uses the name Samantha, has sent the following letter. She's looking for suggestions and feedback. I was married for 12 years to a sociopath who was a minister and had 3 affairs ”¦ it took me that many to finally "get it." We had 2 children who were 6 and 8 when I finally filed for divorce 4 years ago. It's been an ugly 4 years. During that time, I have worked as a teacher part-time making $22,000 a year with no benefits. I have been putting myself through school to get licensed in special ed so I can get into the public schools. I am almost there and got a new job this year. It's not public school and still not any more money, but it's special ed and …

LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: I am losing control as a parentRead More

Category: Laws and courts, Letters to Lovefraud and Spath Tales, Sociopaths and family

Dr. Donald G. Dutton explains that personality disorder is the cause of domestic violence

July 26, 2009 //  by Liane Leedom, M.D.//  104 Comments

For the past several years Donna and I have attended the Battered Mothers Custody Conference and so we have been able to interact with domestic violence experts. Both of us were surprised to discover that although most of the worst spousal assault perpetrators have personality profiles indicative of sociopathy/psychopathy this fact is not recognized by many experts. I have worked to become well acquainted with the scientific literature regarding intimate partner violence because I teach psychology of gender and because I very much want to understand why people who should know better often fail to diagnose sociopathy in perpetrators. This failure to diagnose has lead to intimate partner …

Dr. Donald G. Dutton explains that personality disorder is the cause of domestic violenceRead More

Category: Explaining the sociopath, Sociopaths and family

Enabling a sociopath is unpatriotic

July 4, 2009 //  by Liane Leedom, M.D.//  53 Comments

Sociopaths/psychopaths commit a disproportionate amount of both violent and non-violent crime in all Western countries. Today is July 4th or American Independence Day, so I am going to take this opportunity to ask that friends and family members of sociopaths stop enabling them. According to Webster's Online Dictionary the word enable means: 1 a: to provide with the means or opportunity b: to make possible, practical, or easy c: to cause to operate In her book A Dance With the Devil, (which I highly recommend) Barbara Bentley gives many poignant examples of enabling as she describes how her psychopathic husband accomplished his antisocial goals. The most shocking of many examples is …

Enabling a sociopath is unpatrioticRead More

Category: Explaining the sociopath, Sociopaths and family

Feeling guilty about a sociopathic stepson

June 29, 2009 //  by Donna Andersen//  41 Comments

Lovefraud recently received the following e-mail from a reader who we'll call Martha. I have a 33-year old adult stepson who I believe is sociopathic — he fits all the criteria. He has been a problem to the family ever since his mother threw him out to our house at the age of 13. By that time he was so oppositional there was no dealing with him in any reasonable way. We went through all the “standard” teenage issues with him — petty crime, running away, repeating years in school, counseling, adolescent psych facility, military school till we ran out of money, etc. What is different about our situation from everything I read is that my husband has stood by him for so many years, giving him …

Feeling guilty about a sociopathic stepsonRead More

Category: For parents of sociopaths, Sociopaths and family

Co-parenting with a sociopath

June 15, 2009 //  by Donna Andersen//  291 Comments

Lovefraud recently received the following e-mail from a reader who we'll call Carla: Can you help me with co-parenting with a sociopath? Divorced three months ago, after a two-year fight for my rights. He is not complying as you know. I am going crazy with the way he only shows his wonderful, smooth qualities to the children. I have three boys. I can't stand sending them on weekends to a man who never calls them for two weeks and then lavishes them with charm and gifts. It makes me sick that I am struggling because he has not released even one of 26 accounts to me as decreed in the divorce settlement. He pays my bills and deducts them from the alimony. He follows the agreement under his …

Co-parenting with a sociopathRead More

Category: Media sociopaths, Sociopaths and family

Lovefraud extra: Let’s support Sandra Boss

June 2, 2009 //  by Liane Leedom, M.D.//  38 Comments

The kidnapping trial of "Clark Rockefeller" the psychopathic con artist who is charged with parental kidnapping is happening at the time of this writing. The defense is claiming "insanity" and attacking Sandra Boss for having fallen for his lies. A survey of internet blogs reveals public abuse of Sandra. Please add your comments in support of Sandra to the blogs, particularly this one http://www.boston.com/news/local/breaking_news/2009/06/rockefellers_2.html. To watch the trial live visit:http://www.boston.com/news/local/massachusetts/specials/05_28_09_Rockefeller_live_video/ This is outrageous,Sandra was worked over by the defense. Someone (perhaps an attorney who reads this blog) …

Lovefraud extra: Let’s support Sandra BossRead More

Category: Media sociopaths, Seduced by a sociopath, Sociopaths and family

LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: How can I help my children not suffer?

May 13, 2009 //  by Donna Andersen//  136 Comments

Editor's note: Lovefraud has received another question from Andrea, who wrote in a month ago. If you have any suggestions for her, please share them. I am looking for some strong advice on how to help my children deal with their father ”¦ my ex ”¦ who is a sociopath. We have been divorced for 4 years and I have been terrified of this man. Not so much physically, but more just afraid of his bullying and threats. Even though people have told me that his threats are just words and he cannot follow through on them, it is still hard when he is so confident that he is so right and I am so wrong. I have tried very hard to take the high road through all of this and he falls in this gray area bet …

LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: How can I help my children not suffer?Read More

Category: For children of sociopaths, Sociopaths and family

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Lovefraud Blog Recent Comments

  • Donna Andersen on More evidence that psychopaths do not ‘burn out’: “Hi Samson75 – My paper was peer-reviewed and published in the International Journal of Offender Therapy and Comparative Criminology. There’s…”
  • Joanie Bentz, B.S., M.ED, LBS, CCBP on More evidence that psychopaths do not ‘burn out’: “HI Samson, from what I read of Donna’s article, she had more than 2,000 Lovferaud readers as a valid sample.…”
  • samson75 on More evidence that psychopaths do not ‘burn out’: “love fraud subscribers are not really a valid sample as they represent people who either have had trouble dealing with…”
  • Donna Andersen on The relationship between sociopathy/psychopathy and bipolar disorder: “Thank you for your thoughtful comment.”
  • samson75 on The relationship between sociopathy/psychopathy and bipolar disorder: “The majority of studies show that bipolar and psychopathy can be comorbid, though it is rare. What people likely see…”

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