How to recognize and recover from everyday sociopaths - narcissists

You are here: Home / Archives for 2008

Judges allow psychopathic father visitation and children are murdered

//  by //  20 Comments

Here we go again, another three children murdered after the family courts allowed a psychopathic parent unfettered access them. This is the story of doctor Amy Castillo (a pediatrician) as was told last night on Larry King Live. Dr. Castillo's problems with her husband began in full force about two years ago when he began “staying out all night.” The couple had decided that he would stay home with the children and that she would practice. However, she was unable to go to work because he could not function in the caretaker role. Due to his behavior, she left him. After threatening to kill himself he was hospitalized. According Larry King “court documents say that Mark was diagnosed with a m …

Judges allow psychopathic father visitation and children are murderedRead More

Heeding the exploiter’s earliest warnings

//  by //  200 Comments

Editor's note: This article was submitted by Steve Becker, LCSW, CH.T, who has a private psychotherapy, hypnotherapy, and clinical consulting practice in New Jersey, USA. For more information, visit his website, powercommunicating.com. In my work with clients involved with exploitative personalities, it's not unusual to learn, together, that detectable, early warning signals went unrecognized, minimized, or both. This isn't to blame the subsequent victims of abusive partners; there are many instances where such clues were lacking (and even when not, blame is inappropriate). But it's to appreciate, undefensively, that the honeymoon phase of a relationship is almost, by definition, one …

Heeding the exploiter’s earliest warningsRead More

Josef Fritzl – psychopath

//  by //  69 Comments

By now everyone knows about the astounding case of incest, etc. in Austria. No doubt some are going to excuse Josef Fritzl by suggesting that he must be a mad man. Others (for instance here) will find fault with society. These rationalisations are because for regular people the immensity of the crimes are blinding. But there are enough clues already that what Fritzl is is a psychopath and as such is responsible for his actions. Take one small detail - the alleged role of drugs in the case. Franz Polzer, the Austrian police chief leading the investigation, said Fritzl had given the impression, during protracted interrogations, that after 24 years he now actually believed the web of …

Josef Fritzl – psychopathRead More

Victim loses to a con artist, and then to the courts

//  by 

"A victim of crime shall be treated with fairness, compassion and respect by the criminal justice system." So states the Crime Victims Constitutional Amendment, added to the state of New Jersey constitution in 1991. New Jersey also has a 14-point Crime Victims Bill of Rights (NJS 52:4B-36), which expands upon the constitutional amendment. Among its provisions, crime victims and witnesses are entitled to: Be treated with dignity and compassion by the criminal justice system. Be informed about the criminal justice process. Have inconveniences associated with participation in the criminal justice process minimized to the fullest extent possible. The Bill of Rights sounds good, …

Victim loses to a con artist, and then to the courtsRead More

ASK DR. LEEDOM: How can I move on?

//  by //  126 Comments

This week we received the following email. I am sharing it with you because what she reports is very common on a number of levels that I will discuss. I was married to a sociopath for 25 years. They were horrible years because most of that time I had no idea I was married to a sociopath. I was deeply in love when we met. He told me everything I wanted to hear. Knowing all my weaknesses and fears he fed them, made me totally emotionally dependent on him. He helped me get great jobs, pumped me up so I would keep making more money, while of course he lived off me. But at the same time kept telling me I was ugly, fat, sickly. He had affairs. All of this and I still kept hoping he would change …

ASK DR. LEEDOM: How can I move on?Read More

The opposite of love is … what?

//  by //  52 Comments

Nobel laureate Elie Wiesel is just one person who has said the following: "The opposite of love is not hate, it's indifference". In other words, the opposite of love is not hate, as might have been expected. We've all heard this contention and been struck by it. Yes, we've thought, it is terrible to be ignored. (Pretty awful being hated too, of course.) But I'm grateful to Dawn Eden for mentioning another powerful proposition. Eden, promoting her book 'The Thrill of the Chaste', is currently visiting Canadian high schools. The students seemed interested when I told them what Pope John Paul II called "the opposite of love." It's not hate, as some of them guessed when I asked them what …

The opposite of love is … what?Read More

The sociopath leaves, and her OCD symptoms disappear

//  by //  34 Comments

Editor's note: The following story was submitted by the Lovefraud reader who comments as "Free." I was in an emotionally abusive relationship for 13 years. Two years after we started living together, I slowly developed Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. It first started off with a safety issue, where I was going around the house checking to see if everything was locked and turned off, until it escalated that I couldn't have knives anywhere near me because I was too afraid that I might lash out and hurt someone. I lived in absolute terror because of this. Some instinct told me to hide all of this as much as I could from my husband. But he did find out and he didn't offer any help, or seek help …

The sociopath leaves, and her OCD symptoms disappearRead More

The miracle of freedom after the sociopath is gone

//  by //  88 Comments

I believe in miracles. Not the rock your world, holy saints and rising apparitions kind of miracles. But rather, the light shifting, change your life, in this moment kind of miracle that takes you by the hand and guides you home. The kind of miracle that awakens you to the truth that this moment is all you've got. The kind of miracle that says, grab me and run with me or lose the miracle of your life forever. I know about miracles like that. I got one on a sunny May morning five years ago when I had given myself up for dead. Well, not dead-dead, but rather, the walking breathing dead kind of living that leeches all energy from your body and leaves you without hope of ever finding a …

The miracle of freedom after the sociopath is goneRead More

ASK DR. LEEDOM: How can I make my friends understand?

//  by //  51 Comments

Recently a man wrote me saying that his best friend has been more hurtful than helpful when it comes to helping him recover from his relationship with a sociopathic woman. He had the following comment and question. I am sure many of you will relate to this one, especially you guys out there. I have a best friend who I talked to (of course I desperately needed to get my self-identity back). He instantly tried to help me by seeing my own flaws in the relationship and what I could do better, and stated that I overreacted. Of course, his "help" only contributed to her brainwashing and manipulation because it further fueled my questioning about myself, and further made me believe that I was at …

ASK DR. LEEDOM: How can I make my friends understand?Read More

Dad’s troubles with a sociopathic ex-wife

//  by //  17 Comments

A Lovefraud reader, whom we'll call Joe, recently sent the following e-mail. Joe's ex-wife has custody of their daughter, whom we'll call Suzie. The ex-wife is clearly using the child to sponge off of Joe. My daughter's mother always wants to control me and our daughter. I'm sure you've heard of these types of cases before. My daughter's mother is constantly trying to use my daughter against me to control me like a puppet. I was with my ex for a period of years before our daughter was born, so I blame myself for seeing some of the signs, but not leaving. I see some change in my daughter's behavior as of late, so I'm a bit concerned. When I have her, she doesn't want to go home and every …

Dad’s troubles with a sociopathic ex-wifeRead More