Editor's note: This artice was written by the Lovefraud reader who posts as "One/joy_step_at_a_time." I have been thinking a lot about Donna's May 28 blog thread, If you feel an emotional void, the sociopath will step in, and the responses to it. Tonight I took a long walk and sat down by the lake and thought about what the spath drew out in me. She showed me ”˜the gap.' It's humourous to me to type the phrase ”˜the gap.' When I lived in Eastern Europe, I heard a phrase over the loud speakers at the train station, over and over again. I finally asked a friend the meaning of the phrase, and he told me it meant, ”˜mind the gap between the platform and the train.' I haven't minded the g …
If you feel an emotional void, the sociopath will step in
I recently received email from a woman whom we'll call Adriana: I am told I am a very beautiful, intelligent, fun, woman, but that is all subjective. I am 61 years old but pass for late 40's; good genes. I have been divorced for 10 years and engaged once during that time. I have dated so many men and feel that I have no purpose because I can't find “him.” I don't find most men attractive don't have chemistry with them and I don't want to settle. I have not been successful in love at all and have tried to look within myself to see my faults but the truth is I just want to love and be loved. Anyway, I am so tired of dating and getting my hopes up each time I meet someone I really am att …
If you feel an emotional void, the sociopath will step inRead More
Australian employers may refuse to hire school bullies
Social clubs in New South Wales, Australia, launched a new program last week that may mean serious consequences for school bullies. Under the BullyCheck program, which has government support, people aged 17 to 22 who apply for jobs at registered social clubs will be asked to submit to a character check. If they were bullies in high school, they will not be hired. Read: Job ban on school bullies, on MyFoxPhilly.com. School thugs risk job ban under BULLYCheck, on Fairfield-Advance.WhereILive.com.au. Story suggested by a Lovefraud reader. …
Australian employers may refuse to hire school bulliesRead More
An MRI scan cannot diagnose psychopathy or identify sociopaths
This past week I was talking on the telephone with my student and research assistant when he was mugged by a group of 5-7 thugs. One hit him from behind, knocking him down and another punched him in the abdomen. Ironically, among the items stolen was a copy of “Without Conscience” by Robert Hare. Yesterday, my student asked me, “Those guys in the group who do have empathy and guilt, how do they feel about doing this? What makes them do it?” To which I replied, “I don't think they feel a thing. They are likely all psychopathic (sociopaths). No one wants to admit just how many of them there are. So they draw an artificial line based on the PCL-R (a psychopathy test) and say these thugs are …
An MRI scan cannot diagnose psychopathy or identify sociopathsRead More
Life Happens
By Joyce Alexander, RNP (retired) It's recently been pretty trying around our little “hole in the woods.” A dog we loved dearly “disappeared” out of the yard, and we've been able to find neither “hide nor hair” of him, dead or alive. Not knowing what happened to him is sort of disturbing, but we are dealing with the thought that he got close to the road and someone picked him up, or that the plentiful packs of coyotes that circle our yard got him. He was brave enough (and dumb enough) to attack them if they came into his territory. Whatever happened to him, he is gone, and at this point not likely to return. His silly little ways are greatly missed, even by the other animals in the house. …
Are clinical “continuums” silly?
The narcissistic continuum? The psychopathic continuum? The sociopath explained as being someone located at the apex of the narcissistic continuum? Are clinical continuums silly? Maybe they are. How “nice” are you? Well, maybe you're somewhere on a continuum of “niceness.” At the apex, you are a super-nice individual; in the middle, sometimes very nice, sometimes less so; at the nadir, you are just an incredibly “un-nice” (or “mean”) person. Hmmm. Wow. Somehow this doesn't seem like a newsflash. How sloppy are you? Well, couldn't Robert Hare have developed clinically a “sloppiness” (versus a psychopathic) measure that places all of us somewhere on a “sloppiness” continuum. Wit …
12 steps of recovery from love fraud
Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following email from a reader called “Adelade.” Her previous posts are "When life ain't fair" and “This is the time for me to learn who I am.” Having grown up in a dysfunctional alcoholic environment, I spent just about 35 years involved in one “program” or another, and I was able to strongly identify with my “inner child” after one particularly grueling session with my counseling therapist. I could clearly see how my emotional development had been abruptly arrested during my childhood, and that I had developed into an adult whose every decision and action had been based upon the need for acceptance, validation, appreciation, and approval. Fear of “dys …
A Book Is Born
This week it's a change of subject and a shorter post, because this week I am absolutely delighted to announce that my book “I'm Still Standing” will be published by Mainstream/Random House on 5th July! These are incredibly exciting times, and I am bursting with pride and anticipation that my story is being told. It's a bit nerve-wracking as well, I must say, as I feel somewhat vulnerable putting my ”˜whole self' out there to the world. It's been a fascinating process getting to this stage, and I'm surprised by the number of times I've already been asked the question “How long did it take you to write?” Well, the simple response to that is over four decades. Yes, it's taken a lifetime for …
BOOK REVIEW: The Seducer
The Seducer, by Claudia Moscovici, is a novel about a psychopath. But it's not a Hollywood-style psychopath who stalks unsuspecting strangers to commit ritual murder. This story is much closer to reality—the reality that many of us were horrified to discover. The author, Moscovici, knows of what she writes, because she lived through her own nightmare with a psychopath. Because of her experience, she created the Psychopathy Awareness blog, to help people learn about these human predators. Her thorough understanding of this disordered personality is apparent in the book. The Seducer tells a compelling story of how the psychopaths who live among us pursue their agendas, and how their u …
Yet another military fake
Brian Khan of Harrisburg claimed to be a Marine who served in Afghanistan. He had everyone fooled, including a documentary filmmaker and his own kids. Read Harrisburg man who faked being a Marine even fooled his family, brother says, on PennLive.com. Link supplied by a Lovefraud reader. …