How to recognize and recover from everyday sociopaths - narcissists

LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: Deception from the first encounter, and every single day thereafter

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following letter from a reader who posts as "amille2." When my boyfriend..........or should I say the man I thought was my boyfriend...........walked out the door a couple of days ago, I told him I felt like I had been sucker punched. He replied, "No, you haven't" and shut the door. Just two days before that, I read his wife/girlfriend?'s grandmother's obituary whereby he was listed as the husband/significant other. The physical jolt that went through my body was immense ........... followed by the sound of every lie I had been told for the past 5 years clicking open in front of me to see ........... really see this time. Then they all came crashing down …

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After 30 years with a sociopath, she’s now having the time of her life

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a 67-year-old woman whom we'll call "Maura." Lied, cheated, used me and others. Serial adultery, pornography, probable bisexual behaviors, never used condoms. I didn't know about the adultery until much later. He suffered a head injury, and I mistakenly attributed his bad behaviors to that. Violent and aggressive. Marital fraud; some possessions, like a boat and trailer, "disappeared." Claimed money and objects were stolen, but never reported thefts to the police. Nagged and pestered me constantly to buy large items, mostly vehicles, that we couldn't afford. Developed "hobbies" that kept him away from home on a regular …

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Do you speak psychopath? navigating and exposing disordered communication

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Anyone who has ever been on the receiving end of disordered communication knows that it can produce an array of madness and negativity. That's the point, after all. But, the more experience we have with it, the more we learn that it is all the same. The players may change, but the messages remain identical. Identifying the fact that the correspondence is, in fact, disordered is the first step to handling it positively. The next is to learn to read between the lines of the written word vomit to understand the actual meaning. When we can, it's liberating. Individuals high in psychopathic traits want no one to be happy. They are easily set off by the most minor of circumstances. They torture …

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Fake Marine accused of rape and theft by deception

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Michael J. McNearney Jr. met women on the Plenty of Fish dating site and in bars, then convinced them to spend money on him, used their credit cards for unauthorized transactions and raped them, according to recent testimony in a Kootenai County, Idaho, courtroom. As he was doing this, he falsely claimed to be a Marine. McNearney will stand trial in Idaho District Court. A trial date has not yet been set. Women say they were duped, on CDApress.com Stolen valor: Fake Marine accused of rape, on CDApress.com. Similar charges were filed last year in Spokane, Washington: Man accused of assaulting, stealing from women, on Spokesman.com. Story suggested by a Lovefraud reader.   …

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6 really bad reasons for staying with the sociopath

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If you're reading Lovefraud, it's probably because you suspect that someone in your life is a sociopath. This person's behavior has baffled you how can he lie so prolifically? How can she be so cold? How can anyone behave so horribly and then act as if nothing happened? So you went looking on the Internet for answers. You've plugged this person's upsetting behavior into your favorite search engine and come across a list of traits such as Lovefraud's Key Symptoms of a Sociopath. Check, check, check the person exhibits all or most of them. So what do you do now? The correct answer is to get the person out of your life as quickly as possible. But some people don't do that. Some people stay …

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Man kills his girlfriend, her kids, then sends photos to the kids’ father

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A woman and her three young children were found murdered in Tisdale, Saskatchewan, Canada last week. The victim was Latasha Gosling, and the suspected killer was her boyfriend, Steve O'Shaughnessy. According to Gosling's cousin, O'Shaughnessy took photos of the children's bodies and sent them to their father. O'Shaughnessy's body was later found, an apparent suicide. Tisdale killer O'Shaughnessy sent photos of bodies to children's biological father 'as a birthday gift': cousin, on TheStarPhoenix.com. Link supplied by a Lovefraud reader.   …

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Married to a sociopathic pastor for 55 years

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following email from a reader whom we'll call "Caroltta." I am 72 ”¦ was married 12/60 ”¦ found out in 1/14 my husband, a pastor for 45 yrs., committed adultery @ every pastorate. In fact, he says he has no idea how many x's & does not remember all the women. There was incest involved in his promiscuous life. He considered divorce for many of his women, but knew he could not preach after that, so his last girlfriend convinced him to murder me & they had a plan which did not work out because I told him I was retiring & he could come with me or not. He has been afraid to do anything, because it would mean no further contact with his …

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Recording artist loses his exciting career over sociopathic woman

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call "Cory." It started in 2013. I was a semi-successful, growing recording artist and singer. I just got full custody of my first daughter I was touring. Doing radio interviews. Life was exciting and full of enchantment. I became involved with a young woman I had been talking to since high school on and off. She had always seemed sweet. And a great mother as she had 2 boys of her own. We finally got to meet face to face and had sex. I'm not going to lie. It was amazing. She had it all in my eyes looks, charm, amazing in bed. Willing to do things in bed that most women wouldn't dream of. The third time …

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Con artist Bobbi Ann Finley now on her 15th husband

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She's baaaack!!! Lovefraud first wrote about Bobbi Ann Finley almost five years ago, in September 2010. Finley had a habit of hanging around military bases, meeting servicemen, marrying them, and wiping out their bank accounts. When we first wrote about Finley, she'd married 14 men and had at least nine children with almost as many fathers. She was so infamous that she was profiled on ABC's 20/20. In 2011 Finely was convicted of fraud. She was sentenced to three years in an Alabama prison. Well, she's out, and up to her old tricks. She's married again, although Husband #15 is not military. But they're wanted for passing bad checks all over Oregon, unauthorized use of a motor vehicle …

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Florida doctor arrested again for beating his girlfriend

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Dr. Rafael Azulay, a practicing internist in Pembroke Pines, Florida, was arrested last week for domestic violence. He allegedly punched his girlfriend in the face, and kicked her in the face and stomach, in the home they shared. According to Local10.com, the woman was bleeding when deputies arrived, but Azulay claimed he didn't touch her. A longtime friend of the victim said Azulay humiliated the woman by rubbing cat food and dirt into her face. But the woman was afraid to leave. Pembroke Pines doctor accused of beating girlfriend for second time, on Local10.com. Story suggested by a Lovefraud reader.   …

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