How to recognize and recover from everyday sociopaths - narcissists

You are here: Home / Archives for Donna Andersen

James Montgomery, aka Jim Montgomery, revives Major Fraud in Australia

//  by //  39 Comments

I can't believe it. Almost five years ago, in August 2005, I blew my sociopathic ex-husband, who was impersonating a war hero, out of the water in Australia. Recently, he tried to go swimming again in the same water. For those of you who don't know the story, I launched Lovefraud because my ex-husband, James Montgomery, took a quarter-million dollars from me, cheated with at least six women during our two-and-a-half year marriage, had a child with one of the women, and then, ten days after I left him, married the mother of the child. It was the second time he committed bigamy. One way that Montgomery was able to gain my confidence was by pretending to be a war hero. He told me that …

James Montgomery, aka Jim Montgomery, revives Major Fraud in AustraliaRead More

Treating sexually active priests

//  by //  46 Comments

A psychologist who treats priests was not  surprised by continuing revelations of sexual abuse in the Catholic Church. But there was something that surprised him: "It was a surprise for me to see how many psychopaths I met in the priesthood," Dr. Leslie Lothstein said. "Glib, callous, could say anything to you and be charming." Read A psychologist steeped in treatment of sexually active priests, on nytimes.com. Link suggested by a Lovefraud reader. …

Treating sexually active priestsRead More

What sociopaths want: power, control and sex

//  by //  481 Comments

The two most recent Letters to Lovefraud both had the same theme: Sociopathic men who relentlessly pursued women, proclaiming their love, making glowing promises of a committed relationship. The men pushed for sex, and although the women resisted, eventually, believing they were involved in real romances, the women succumbed to the men's physical desires. With that, both women were dumped. Read the letters here: I met him on Facebook, was used for sex and dumped the next day I felt bonded, even though this made me nauseated Both women were astounded at how they were unceremoniously booted. They had a hard time coming to grips with the idea that they'd been used and abused. How …

What sociopaths want: power, control and sexRead More

The Bluebird of Happiness

//  by //  68 Comments

By Ox Drover Today I had an epiphany: I am happy. Really happy. Joyously happy. Exuberantly happy. Why is today different that any other day? Two months ago I was unhappy. Why am I now happy? Nothing much has really changed from two months ago. I'm a few pounds lighter, but that isn't what makes me happy, though, I am working on losing some weight. My bank account is quite a bit lighter than it was two months ago, so that isn't what is making me happy. The psychopaths in my life don't like me one bit more than they did two months ago. I haven't found the love of my life riding on a white horse, or even a white donkey. What is making me happy? Well, today I saw the “Bluebird of H …

The Bluebird of HappinessRead More

The Lovefraud message, a step further

//  by //  2 Comments

Many readers have told me that Lovefraud is the most comprehensive website about sociopaths on the Internet. According to Google Analytics, Lovefraud gets more than 50,000 visits a month, and of them, almost half are returning visitors. People return, I'm sure, because of the Lovefraud Blog. As of May 1, 2010, a total of 716 articles, and more than 72,400 comments were posted on the blog. We have a vibrant, helpful conversation going.  We talk about why sociopaths do what they do, how we fell into the trap, how we can recover, and the huge problem that these predators represent in the world. Anything related to sociopaths is fair game for discussion on the Lovefraud Blog. So why am I …

The Lovefraud message, a step furtherRead More

Respite for adopted Russian children and their parents

//  by //  6 Comments

Many Russian children adopted by Americans suffer from the legacy of fetal alcohol syndrome, institutionalization, poverty and socially corrosive survival skills. A ranch in Montana gives them—and their parents—a break. Read Russian adoptees get a respite on the range, on NYTimes.com. Link submitted by a Lovefraud reader. …

Respite for adopted Russian children and their parentsRead More

The importance of teaching empathy to children

//  by //  27 Comments

Neuroscientists, psychologists and educators believe that bullying in schools and other kinds of violence can be reduced by encouraging empathy at an early age. Read How not to raise a bully: The early roots of empathy on Time.com. Link submitted by a reader via the Lovefraud Facebook fan page. …

The importance of teaching empathy to childrenRead More

Idealism and sociopaths

//  by //  188 Comments

Last year, Slate published an article called My mother married her prison pen pal. A synopsis of the story is this: After 22 years of marriage, the author's parents divorced. One day her mother receives a collect phone call from Joe, who was incarcerated. He dialed her phone number at random; thinking it was someone she knew who had the same name, the woman accepted the call. The prisoner asked the woman to write to him. She thought it was a good mentorship opportunity, so she did. Eventually, the woman married the guy. Please pause now and read the story: My mother married her prison pen pal By Anna Balkrishna The biggest myth Mom knew that Joe was in jail—she started w …

Idealism and sociopathsRead More

Lovefraud’s comment about sociopaths for the DSM-5

//  by //  175 Comments

Editor's note: The American Psychiatric Association is in the process of updating its Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fifth Edition, which is the main reference book used by mental health professionals. Back in February, Lovefraud invited you, our readers, to complete a survey on issues related to the new DSM-5. We will be preparing a full scientific paper on the results of the survey. In the meantime, following is Lovefraud's comment to the DSM-5 committee, which includes the basic survey results. To read the revised definition of antisocial personality disorder in the draft of the DSM-5, click the following link. (The working group has recommended …

Lovefraud’s comment about sociopaths for the DSM-5Read More

10 Signs that you’re dating a sociopath

//  by //  1,523 Comments

If your new romantic interest exhibits all or most of the following behaviors, be careful. He or she might be a sociopath. 1. Charisma and charm. They're smooth talkers, always have an answer, never miss a beat. They seem to be very exciting. 2. Enormous ego. They act like the smartest, richest or most successful people around. They may actually come out and tell you that. 3. Overly attentive. They call, text and e-mail constantly. They want to be with you every moment. They resent time you spend with your family and friends. 4. Jekyll and Hyde personality. One minute they love you; the next minute they hate you. Their personality changes like flipping a switch. 5. Blame …

10 Signs that you’re dating a sociopathRead More