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Donna Andersen

You are here: Home / Archives for Donna Andersen
Five Step Exit

The 5 Step Exit – How to leave your sociopathic partner

January 4, 2016 //  by Donna Andersen//  71 Comments

Book Review: The Five Step Exit The skills you need to leave a narcissist, psychopath or other toxic partner and recover your happiness now, by Amber Ault, Ph.D. It's the New Year. Did you make a New Year's resolution to really, finally, emphatically, get out of your toxic relationship, once and for all? If your answer is yes, or even if you're still just thinking about putting an end to the madness, you need this book: The Five Step Exit The skills you need to leave a narcissist, psychopath or other toxic partner and recover your happiness now, by Amber Ault, Ph.D. In this slim, wonderful book, Dr. Ault promises to take you, step by step, through the process of disengaging from an abusive …

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Category: Book reviews

7 Surprising Reasons Why Loving a Cheater Is Actually a Gift

December 28, 2015 //  by Donna Andersen//  7 Comments

This article, by Donna Andersen, was originally published on YourTango.com. Your partner is a heartless, unrepentant cheater. Here's why it could be good for you. My ex-husband cheated as a way of life. He carried on affairs with at least six women (that I know of) during our relationship—which was amazing, considering we were only together for two and a half years. He had a child with one of those women. And then, 10 days after I left him—not after we divorced, after I left him—he married the mother of the child. It was the second time he committed bigamy. Sorting through the file boxes full of papers he left behind—the guy was a packrat—I discovered evidence that during the seven or so …

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Category: Recovery from a sociopath

Spath Tales

I am legally not allowed to protect my child from his sociopathic father

December 26, 2015 //  by Donna Andersen//  7 Comments

Editor's note: Lovefraud recevied the following story from a reader whom we'll call "Clarissa." I met the sociopath when I was a 16-year-old Crown Ward on "Independent Living." He was older than me and in the Army. I was in high school. I became pregnant at 17. Children's Aid attempted to abandon me and have me instead rely on social services. The sociopath (father) wanted me to abort the child or keep it   not put it up for adoption. He would not have a child of his in the world where he could not control it. I had been considering adoption or having the child on my own and didn't want him involved. His mother, possibly also sociopathic, met me in secret urging me to make a family with her s …

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Category: Letters to Lovefraud and Spath Tales, Sociopaths and family

‘Red Flags of Love Fraud’ now in Spanish: ‘Alertas Rojas de Estafa Amorosa’

December 23, 2015 //  by Donna Andersen//  2 Comments

Editor's note: If you have Spanish-speaking friends, family or acquaintances, and you want to help protect them from sociopaths, here is the answer. "Red Flags of Love Fraud 10 signs you're dating a sociopath," is now available in Spanish! Forward this article to them. Alertas rojas de estafa amorosa 10 señales de que estás saliendo con un sociópata De Donna Andersen, autora de Lovefraud.com Tienes una relacin amorosa que comenzó como un torbellino de atención y afecto, pero ahora te atormenta el temor de que algo no va bien. O has tenido una relación que era verbal, emocional, financiera o incluso físicamente abusiva. Esa persona ya se ha ido, pero sigues sin comprender cómo te eng …

‘Red Flags of Love Fraud’ now in Spanish: ‘Alertas Rojas de Estafa Amorosa’Read More

Category: Explaining the sociopath

10 signs your addicted to a cheater

10 Signs You’re Addicted to Loving a Cheater

December 21, 2015 //  by Donna Andersen//  4 Comments

Editor's note: This article by Donna Andersen was originally published on YourTango.com. All of the following still applies if your partner is a woman. You know he's seeing another woman. Or perhaps you ARE the other woman. Why can't you let him go? You discover your man is cheating. You know he's bad for you. Your friends tell you to dump him, but the truth is, you still want him. If the pull is unbearably strong, maybe it's not love that you feel—but addiction. Do you do any of the following? (Be honest!) 1. You confront him about the calls in his phone from other women. He comes up excuses, you know they're lame—but you accept them anyway. 2. He says that it's your fault tha …

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Category: Seduced by a sociopath

One Mom's Battle

Overcoming the insanity of co-parenting with an exploiter

December 14, 2015 //  by Donna Andersen//  8 Comments

Book Review: Divorcing a Narcissist One Mom's Battle, by Tina Swithin "The only thing more difficult than being married to a narcissist is divorcing a narcissist." This is one of the first sentences that Tina Swithin writes in her book, Divorcing a Narcissist One Mom's Battle. It's a sentiment I've heard time and time again from Lovefraud readers who have faced the same battle. When Tina met Seth, she didn't know he was a narcissist. In fact, like most of us, she didn't know what a narcissist was. But she was 25 years old and felt like she was ready to find a real relationship. Before Seth, Tina had been in relationships in which the man required "fixing." She realized that she didn't want …

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Category: Book reviews

James Montgomery and Donna Andersen at Christmas 1996.

30 signs that you should dump your partner before Christmas

December 9, 2015 //  by Donna Andersen//  20 Comments

The holidays are quickly approaching. It's the season when we decorate our homes, spend time with family and friends, and buy thoughtful gifts for the ones we love. Everyone wants someone to hug over the holidays. So even if things have been strained or rocky with our romantic partners, we may still want the holidays will be pleasant, even romantic. We may go out of our way to make them special, hoping our partner will reciprocate, or at least acknowledge our efforts. Sometimes we hope but fear that our partners will disappoint us. If you're apprehensive about how enjoyable the holidays with your partner will be, read on. Christmas with my ex I spent three holiday seasons with my …

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Category: Seduced by a sociopath

How to spot terrorists and sociopaths

December 7, 2015 //  by Donna Andersen//  35 Comments

[youtube_sc url="https://youtu.be/ZTksPl2jnfk"]Last Wednesday, Dec. 2, in San Bernardino, California, 14 people were killed and 21 wounded when two terrorists, Tashfeen Malik and Syed Rizwan Farook, shot up a holiday party. Yes, I said they were terrorists, although it took American officials several days to come to the conclusion that two Muslims with roots in the Middle East, wearing tactical clothing and killing innocent people with assault rifles, were, in fact, terrorists. Even after the FBI stated it was treating the bloodbath as an "act of terrorism," U.S. Attorney General Loretta Lynch "urged the public not to jump to conclusions about the motive for the attack or the couple's ties …

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Category: Explaining the sociopath

How can a run-in with a sociopath be a spiritual journey?

November 30, 2015 //  by Donna Andersen//  19 Comments

This post refers to spiritual concepts. Please read Lovefraud's statement on Spiritual Recovery. My first book is entitled, Love Fraud how marriage to a sociopath fulfilled my spiritual plan.  I imagine that for many of you, your reaction to this title is, "Huh?" God is good, right? The Universe is supposed to support us, right? So how can there possibly be anything spiritual about having your life trampled by a sociopath? Believe me, as I was in the midst of the struggle, I asked those questions. Except in my pleadings with my Higher Power, I wasn't so polite. As you can see from my wedding video, I was well and truly duped into marrying James Montgomery. He presented …

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Category: Book reviews, Spiritual and energetic recovery

‘Hitting Home with Sarah Ferguson,’ a two-part documentary on domestic violence in Australia, airs Nov. 24 and 25

November 24, 2015 //  by Donna Andersen//  Leave a Comment

Isabella Cullen's husband, Ben, hit her in the face as he held their child in his arms. Wendy fled her ex-partner with her children. They had only the clothes they were wearing. "Rachel's" injuries are documented by a doctor who runs a forensic domestic violence service. These are some of the stories included in "Hitting Home with Sarah Ferguson," a documentary about the "epidemic" of domestic violence in Australia. It airs Tuesday, Nov. 24, and Wednesday, Nov. 25, on ABC in Australia. As the women tell their stories, they describe the same behaviors we discuss here on Lovefraud every day. The stories are chilling. Woman whose husband punched her until she was bleeding in the face as he held …

‘Hitting Home with Sarah Ferguson,’ a two-part documentary on domestic violence in Australia, airs Nov. 24 and 25Read More

Category: Explaining the sociopath

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