How to recognize and recover from everyday sociopaths - narcissists

You are here: Home / Lovefraud Blog

Save on ‘The Wise Lesbian Guide to Getting Free From Crazy-Making Relationships’

//  by //  Leave a Comment

By Amber Ault, Ph.D., MSW In the wake of the Gay Pride Month massacre of 49 people gathered at the Pulse nightclub in Orlando, the world has taken notice of the violence and threats of violence lesbian gay, bisexual, and transgender people face on a regular basis.   What's less visible is that the patterns of oppression we face in the broader society sometimes trickle down into our most intimate relationships.   Lesbian and gay people need to be able to turn to partners for safety, support, care, and kindness. This is especially important as we face discrimination and invalidation in the broader culture. Unfortunately, for many people in same-sex relationships, home is not a haven but, i …

Save on ‘The Wise Lesbian Guide to Getting Free From Crazy-Making Relationships’Read More

Sociopaths … Manipulation And Gaslighting And Control, Oh My!

//  by //  10 Comments

By O.N. Ward Every week, a chapter of my book, "Husband, Liar, Sociopath: How He Lied, Why I Fell For It & The Painful Lessons Learned" (available via Amazon.com, just click on the title or book cover) will be published here on Lovefraud. To read prior chapters, please see the links at the bottom of the post. Chapter 10: The Secret Wedding By the time Paul and I got engaged, we had been living together and working in Minneapolis for six months. Still, virtually everything I knew about Paul was from our time at Yale. He was that busy at his new job. Chronically absent or exhausted from his grueling schedule, he rarely talked to me about his clients or assignments. He had no time to hear a …

Sociopaths … Manipulation And Gaslighting And Control, Oh My!Read More

Orlando shooter Omar Mateen – he’s a sociopath, not a jihadist

//  by //  24 Comments

  Like all of America and civilized people around the world, I am heartbroken and sickened by the 49 people slaughtered and 53 injured in an Orlando nightclub early Sunday morning. The shooter was Omar Mateen, an American born in New York of Afghan parents. In a 911 call to police as the dead lay around him, Mateen swore allegiance to ISIS. But as authorities try to figure out how Mateen became radicalized, I'm not so sure that he shot up a gay nightclub for Allah. To me, it looks like Mateen was simply an evil sociopath, and pursuing Islamic jihad was a convenient excuse to get a gun. Ex-wife Sitora Yusufiy The first clue comes from how Mateen's ex-wife, Sitora Yusufiy, described him. …

Orlando shooter Omar Mateen – he’s a sociopath, not a jihadistRead More

How to recover from a sociopathic partner

//  by //  Leave a Comment

  [youtube_sc url="https://youtu.be/ivfmgtYTLWo" title="How%20to%20recover%20from%20a%20sociopathic%20partner"] If you've discovered that your partner is an exploiter, and you don't know what to think and what to do well, I totally understand. I've been there. That's why I developed the Lovefraud Recovery Series. These three webinars, each one hour long, will help you comprehend what you are dealing with and figure out how to move forward: June 16 - Sociopathic Seduction: How you got hooked and why you stayed (If you missed it, watch the recording) More info June 23 - What Did They Want? Psychopaths, antisocials and other exploiters in romantic relationships More info June 30 - E …

How to recover from a sociopathic partnerRead More

Recovery from a sociopath through poetry

//  by //  Leave a Comment

Editors note: A Lovefraud reader whom we'll call "arpinsandie" says that writing poetry helped her recover from an involvement with a sociopath. She shares some of what she wrote, in the hope that it will help others as well. Poem for the Heart Emotion Conscience Less Do you know what hate is No Do you know what it is to be hated No Do you know where hate fits No Where warm humans love Hate is in you Where softness and kindness live You cultivate destruction Why do people cry They are hurt broken bt you Your charm superficial Boredom reigns where love should be A wonderful man to all outside see The real you ? - Only I see Cos you cant You don't hurt Cos you cant You don't love Cos you …

Recovery from a sociopath through poetryRead More

Therapists: Here’s how to help clients leave a toxic relationship

//  by //  Leave a Comment

  Clients may know that they are unhappy, anxious and depressed because of their relationships, but they can't seem to leave. In fact, they become confused just by thinking about leaving. How can you best serve them? The Five Step Exit model will help. This program, developed by Dr. Amber Ault, is specifically designed to help you help clients in a structured fashion. You guide them to evaluate their circumstances, create an exit strategy, put together a support team, move forward with the plan, and then reclaim their lives. Dr. Ault will teach you exactly how to do it in an online webinar on Wednesday, June 15, 2016, from 2 -4 p.m. Eastern time. You will be able to ask questions of …

Therapists: Here’s how to help clients leave a toxic relationshipRead More

I was dying inside, trying to keep her happy

//  by //  14 Comments

  Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a man whom we'll call, "Timothy." I knew her from over a decade ago. I guess you can say we started as friends with benefits. Back in those days I should've remembered the times we fooled around, even while she was with someone when he went out of town. Over the years she married this person, and I went on into other relationships myself. In 2013 we had an encounter at a motel in her hometown, I happened to be working in. In 2014 the person I was in a relationship with left the state. The woman from a decade ago then contacted me and invited me to a casino/hotel she was staying in. I went and spent a couple of nights with …

I was dying inside, trying to keep her happyRead More

Sociopaths Seem Like Prince Charming…At First

//  by //  1 Comment

By O.N. Ward Every week, a chapter of my book, "Husband, Liar, Sociopath: How He Lied, Why I Fell For It & The Painful Lessons Learned" (available via Amazon.com, just click on the title or book cover) will be published here on Lovefraud. To read prior chapters, please see the links at the bottom of the post. Chapter 9: Prince Charming Picks Me I poured myself into my new job, but I was a lightweight compared to Paul. He lived and breathed for his firm, often staying at the office until well past midnight and even spending entire weekends at work. Consulting companies are known to demand insane hours from their new associates. Still, the amount of effort Paul invested in his job was b …

Sociopaths Seem Like Prince Charming…At FirstRead More

Online webinar series: How to recover from a relationship with a sociopath

//  by //  Leave a Comment

If you're like most people who find Lovefraud, you've already tangled with a sociopath and want to know how to escape and recover. That's exactly what I explain in my upcoming Lovefraud CE program. I'll be teaching three one-hour webinars: June 16 - Sociopathic Seduction: How you got hooked and why you stayed June 23 - What Did They Want? Psychopaths, antisocials and other exploiters in romantic relationships June 30 - Escaping the Sociopath and Rebuilding Your Life All the programs are at 8 pm Eastern time. If you can't attend at the specific date and time, no worries the programs will be recorded, and you can watch them whenever you want. However, if you participate in the initial …

Online webinar series: How to recover from a relationship with a sociopathRead More

After a year of No Contact, she saw the sociopath and felt – nothing

//  by //  7 Comments

  A year ago, Lovefraud posted an email exchange that I had with a reader, whom we called "Alana." Alana dated a man who at first love bombed her, was obsessed with her and then turned ugly. She tried to leave him many times, and he threatened to kill himself. She finally managed to break it off. Then six months later, he sent her an email from a new email address, begging for her to return. Alana wrote back out of guilt and shame and then felt sick about it. She asked for reassurance that No Contact was the right approach. Read the story here: After 6 months of No Contact, the sociopath wants to begin again I just heard from Alana again. Here's her latest email: It has been a …

After a year of No Contact, she saw the sociopath and felt – nothingRead More