How to recognize and recover from everyday sociopaths - narcissists

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LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: The ride on the sociocrazytrain was painful, but I don’t regret it

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following email from a reader whom we'll call Roseann. I just wanted to thank you for developing the Lovefraud site, sharing your experience and writing your books. I have read both. The books and your site have helped me tremendously, not only initially when I needed to understand what was happening, during the no contact time and even now, when he's long gone. It helps me to remember who I was back then and to see whom I am now and I'm pleased with my progress and the choices I made. Cutting contact All in all, I spent the better part of 10 years dealing with my on and off relationship/friendship with my spath and THE best thing I did was cut …

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Machiavellian brains light up with the opportunity to exploit others

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It's called the Dark Triad narcissism, psychopathy and Machiavellianism. You definitely want to avoid people who have these traits and personality disorders. Machiavellianism is a term used to describe those who manipulate and deceive to get their way. A recent study shows that these traits are hardwired into the brains of people who act this way. The study was conducted by researchers at the University of Pecs in Hungary. They tested the research subjects for Machiavellianism, and divided them into "high Mach" and "low Mach" groups. Then they used fMRI machines to observe the subjects' brains while they played a "trust game." The "high Machs" showed higher neural activity when their partner …

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Suffering PTSD from a Sociopath and asking God for help

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Editor's note: The following article refers to spiritual concepts. Please read Lovefraud's statement on Spiritual Recovery. The Downward Spiral to the Bottom A year and a half after the downward spiral of a 10 year relationship came to the ground, I started noticing new behaviors of mine surface.  New thoughts, new spikes in anger, outward and physical expressions of fear, anxiety, being paranoid, scared. I'm not sure why in my case it took longer to surface.  It could be because I was dealing internally with so many other facets of breaking free like the divorce, custody battles, financial wars and deep betrayal and confusion over the last year. Episodes I started to have these "episodes" t …

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LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: Breaking free of the controlling, sociopathic girlfriend

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following email from a woman who posts as “seekeroflight.” I feel this overwhelming urge to reach out to your website, and I am not quite sure exactly why. I'm working my way through reading pretty much your whole website, or at least the articles which strike my eye as I go through it. It is one of very few things in my life right now that helps me to feel a little less alone. I told my life partner (of almost 7 1/2 years) that I was done with the relationship in January of this year. I gave her pretty much no warning just sat down one evening and told her I thought we should break up. She claims she saw it coming, but I think that's a lie. Judging by ho …

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26 abusive behaviors from a female narcissistic sociopath

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Editor's note: A Lovefraud reader who calls himself “Fly” posted the following comment on August 7, 2015. It is a great description of dysfunctional behavior in a woman, so it is reproduced here in order to help others. Fly received responses responses to his email from the woman, which are reproduced below. He read the emails but did not respond I am a 60 year old male who was living with a 50 year old female for three years. I had known her for two years before. I wrote a letter to my Ex-girlfriend a few days after I left. I had said to myself enough is enough after one of her quick insulting outbursts. I packed my belongings, threw them in the car and just walked out of the house never to …

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My Niece in My Bed…with My Sociopath Husband

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Dinner in Bed The spath convinced me to have his 17 year old niece come from his country and have us house her to try and give her a chance to live here.  I agreed.  Seemed noble, right?  In November she came.  I conceived my daughter in January; she was still in our home. I wanted her to have a good chance at life so I got her plugged into school here to learn English, taught her how to drive, took her to get her hair done, you know all those things.  There was a language barrier because she did not speak English, but I spent a lot of time and effort helping her. One night I had one of my girlfriends over and we were cooking dinner.  I hadn't seen my niece nor the spath around for a while; i …

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Sociopathic husband isolates her in the wilderness and lives with two wives at once

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call “Esther.” Names have been changed. Thirteen years ago I met Frank on Match.com. After just a few dates he said we were soul mates. He moved in quickly and insisted that I move away from my identical twin and he rented an apartment for us to share. I never saw my twin again. He purposely kept me from her, my family and moved me to a secluded home up in a one road only access to a national forest. I lived with no running water. No Internet. No long distance phone. No cable. To heat my home I had to chop wood or save money to buy trees that were wet and had to wait for them to dry out before I could burn them. I …

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The sociopath cheated me out of a million dollar retirement plan

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Editor's note: The following story was sent to Lovefraud by a reader whom we'll call “Sherri-Lynn.” I was married to a sociopath for fifteen years. I was with this man for nearly eighteen years. We have two children together. This man lied to me for fifteen years about "our retirement plan." The money that funded this so-called retirement plan was gifted to my ex and I every year at Christmas from his mother and stepfather. The money was in the form of stocks that were electronically put into our stock portfolio. Statements arrived in the mail every month or so addressed to both he and I. My name was on every account, statement, summary etc. I had my own retirement plan (a small one ) that my …

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Signs of a sociopath in Houston murder of 2 adults, 6 kids

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On Saturday, David Conley of Houston broke into the home of his former partner, Valerie Jackson, with whom he shared a child. He handcuffed and shot Jackson, Dewayne Jackson, identified as her husband, and six children, including his own son. Conley told investigators that he broke in and killed eight people because Valerie Jackson had changed the locks on the doors. In my opinion, this tragic story is an example of a romantic involvement with a violent sociopath. Earl Yanske, Valerie Jackson's brother, said that Conley struggled with bipolar disorder. "He'd be in a very happy mood one moment, then the next moment go off," Yanske said, according to Chron.com. "He was always very …

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My mother was bent on turning us kids against our father

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader who posts as “Lobelle55.” My mother was a sociopath. She was the sweetest, most beautiful and doting mother on earth. Very talented. But she had a dark side. She was bent on turning us kids (5) all against our father - especially me. I was her favorite hand picked target. As a child she indulged me a lot and I was very dependent upon her. She manipulated aggressively, always telling graphic stories to me about my dad's unfaithfulness and anger (she could really push his buttons), even at a very young age around 6 - 8 years old. Of course I did not have any idea that she was also telling awful lies about me to my dad! I had be …

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