How to recognize and recover from everyday sociopaths - narcissists

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EFT tapping can cure the emotional pain of your involvement with the sociopath

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[youtube_sc url=http://youtu.be/pAclBdj20ZU] Today begins the 7th Annual Tapping World Summit. It's a free online event, and if you are still suffering, in any way, from your encounter with the sociopath, I strongly recommend that you check it out. Tapping, also called Emotional Freedom Technique, is a form of energy psychology. I believe this is the new frontier of psychology, although it is rooted in 5,000 years of Chinese acupressure practice. The therapy looks funny using your fingers, you tap precise points on your head, hands and torso while verbally making a statement about a stressful situation or a disturbing memory. After going through the tapping sequence a few times, the …

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LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: Successful No Contact against the sociopath

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following email from a reader whom we'll call "Claudette." My problem is the same as many other whose lives have been sucked into that of a sociopath. I met mine about this time last year. My long-term relationship has broken down and I was feeling unhappy, lonely and vulnerable. He seemed like everything I could ever have wanted charming, funny, affectionate then loving and very sexy. He would send me loads of texts telling me how much he wanted me and then how much he loved me and that we were perfect together and amazing in bed and out. I left my home and got a flat so that I could be with him crazy I know but it seemed so right. My former …

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Why do some people take pleasure in cruelty?

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Delroy Paulhus, a professor of psychology at the University of British Columbia in Canada studies the dark side of human beings to define the different flavors of everyday evil. Paulhus has created a series of tests to identify people who have a "dark personality." He works to answer the question: Why do some people take pleasure in cruelty? Not just psychopaths and murderers — but school bullies, internet trolls and even apparently upstanding members of society such as politicians and policemen. Paulhus tends to focus on everyday evil rather than criminal or psychiatric cases. Others have called narcissism, Machiavellianism and psychopathy the "Dark Triad," which is a triple whammy of na …

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I thought I was the 3rd wife, but I was more like No. 8

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call "Gale." I was a widow for 5 years. After being married for 43 years, my husband died of cancer. I did not like being alone and therefore I was vulnerable, to say the least. I enjoyed being a wife & mother, and sharing, loving & caring for my family. I met my psycho on the internet, thru a dating web site. Had I trusted my intuition, I would have run. There were many red flags. I did not ignore, but was charmingly convinced I was not being fair, but judgmental. I considered myself to be the 3rd wife, but after several years of marriage, one of his daughters convinced me I was more like number …

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Sociopaths and Parental Alienation

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He trained our children with Skittles. Sometimes he used little wads of paper. Any time we were in public places together, like watching a game or something, my ex would take a napkin or a popcorn bag and tear it up and throw little pieces of it at them if they were sitting with me. Or he'd buy a bag of Skittles and throw them, one at a time, giggling and smiling as he bounced them off the backs of their heads until they got up from their place beside me and moved over to sit with him. Then he would let them relax. It sounds miniscule. But that's where parental alienation lives—in every miniscule detail. It's not just in court—it's also in the granular. In the point where a child fin …

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For Valentine’s Day: The difference between sociopathic “love” and real love

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Yes, there is love after the sociopath. I divorced my sociopathic ex-husband, James Montgomery, in 2000. A little more than a year later, I met Terry Kelly. We dated for a few years, got to know each other, and then married. Terry and I just celebrated our 10th anniversary. I can honestly say that I am as happy and in love as I was on our wedding day. What's different about love with a normal, caring person, and "love" with a sociopath? Just about everything. Real love is peaceful I don't have the stress, drama and doubt that I felt while married to the sociopath. Instead, with Terry, I feel calm and content. Real love is supportive My sociopathic ex-husband was demanding and …

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LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: I will not let another person control my heart and my brain

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Editor's note: The following email was received from a reader whom we'll call "Clara." I am so glad that I decided to look into narcissism and psychological problems. I have found my answers and feel better already. I now have an answer to what happened to my whirlwind romance. Thankfully I was a lot luckier than the other women that have posted. My guy was perfect for 4 months. Then it went into hyperdrive and he told me he was in love with me. I was feeling it also. He emotionally got me into that position for the 4 months. He was beautiful and loving and thoughtful. I couldn't believe my luck! Exactly 9 days after he told me he was in love with me, our relationship was over. He said …

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Brain Science Part 3: Psychopathic brains and punishment

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Editor's note: Third in a series of three articles appearing in other publications on what scientists are learning about the brain and behavior through MRI imaging. A new study finds that psychopaths have abnormalities in the parts of their brains related to learning from punishment. MRI studies were conducted on violent offenders 12 with psychopathy and 20 with antisocial personality disorder but not psychopathy along with 18 healthy non-offenders. Those with psychopathy showed differences in the brain regions associated with empathy, processing of pro-social emotions such as guilt and embarrassment, and moral reasoning. The research showed that the psychopathic offenders failed to l …

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Brain Science Part 2: Brains of homicidal juveniles appear to be different

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Editor's note: Second in a series of three articles appearing in other publications on what scientists are learning about the brain and behavior through MRI imaging. Brain scans of 12-18 year old juvenile offenders who have committed homicides look different than the scans of juvenile offenders who have not committed homicides, according to a study published in the journal NeuroImage: Clinical. Dr. Kent Kiehl, of the Mind Research Network in Albuquerque, New Mexico, says the differences have serious implications for understanding some of the root brain problems that could lead youths to cross a line and commit violent crime. Dr. Kiehl hopes that through neuroscience, at-risk kids may be …

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Brain Science Part 1: Teenage brains vulnerable to poor judgment

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Editor's note: First in a series of three articles appearing in other publications on what scientists are learning about the brain and behavior through MRI imaging. Teenage brains are still under construction. MRI imaging has found that while the areas of the brain associated with motor control and hand/eye coordination are fully developed, the parts associated with rational thinking and evaluating future consequences are half-baked. The result: Even smart, well-behaved teenagers are motivated by emotion and pleasure, which can lead them to take dangerous risks. Teens' immature brains pose all sorts of dangers, on Philly.com. Tomorrow: Brains of homicidal juveniles appear to be …

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