Explaining the sociopath

By Joanie Bentz, B.S., M.Ed., CCBP, BC Munchausen Syndrome by Proxy (MSBP) is a mental health problem in which caregivers make up or cause illness or injury in a person who is under their care, according to Michigan Medicine. The victims are usually children, the disabled, or the elderly. Some experts view MSBP as a type of sociopathic behavior, specifically as a subgroup of borderline personality disorder. What does this syndrome look like? Three different experiences of Munchausen Syndrome by Proxy Chloe is a grown woman who has childhood memories revolving around doctor visits, her mother's illnesses and her mother's concern about others  being sick. Her mother insisted on caring for …

The sociopathic behavior of Munchausen Syndrome by ProxyRead More

All across America, protests against the death of George Floyd while in police custody have devolved into riots, looting, arson and vandalism. I am willing to bet that many of the rioters are sociopaths, or followers of sociopaths. Atlantic City, New Jersey, where I live, was targeted. I went for a walk on the Boardwalk last Monday morning, as I do once or twice a week. I passed multiple stores that were boarded up — one of them after windows were smashed. The Boardwalk has been desolate since March, ever since the coronavirus closed all the casinos, restaurants and stores. Things have been eerily quite, but nothing was boarded up. That all changed when rioters came to Atlantic City — …

Yes, many rioters are sociopathsRead More

By Amber Ault, Ph.D., MSW The current global crisis has me thinking of you, and how folks in relationships with personality disordered people face special challenges during this pandemic emergency. Before we talk about that, let's think about how the novel coronavirus is similar to something less novel to you: the tricky, toxic patterns of folks with anti-social, narcissistic, and borderline personality problems. Listen to Amber Ault discuss Domestic Violence During Lockdown on the Insights with Dick Goldberg podcast Here's what comes to mind for me: 1. Novel coronavirus is parasitic --- exploiting the very life of a human being who was minding their own damned business when the virus …

Is the corona virus a psychopath?Read More

By Joanie Bentz, B.S., M.ED, CCBT, BC If you have had the misfortune of dealing with a sociopath in your life, you are well acquainted with many of their abuse strategies that left you feeling you are like a deer in the headlights, taken by surprise and knocked off your feet. However, there are times when sociopaths do not come straight at you on their own, but employ third parties to carry out their control tactics to ensure you are complying with their demands on a continual basis. This is called abuse by proxy. Why does the sociopath employ third parties? There may be several reasons why the sociopath doesn't use direct tactics with you. You may have inflicted narcissistic …

What is sociopathic abuse by proxy?Read More

Editor's note: Lovefraud recognizes that sociopaths are both male and female. This article, however, is about male sociopaths. Updated for 2019 Often, the stories told here on Lovefraud about abusive relationships have so much in common that readers jokingly ask each other if they were involved with the same man. Still, there can be profound differences in the stories. For example, quite a few people have said that the men who abused them sometimes exhibited great shame. I was always mystified by this, because I never saw an ounce of shame in my psychopathic ex-husband, James Montgomery. I assumed that those who were exhibiting shame were playacting. Maybe they weren't. A few …

BOOK REVIEW: ‘The Batterer’ describes three types of male abusersRead More

Two Lovefraud readers recently sent in articles explaining their views regarding their experiences with sociopaths. Their opinions are almost completely opposite from each other. In The importance of recognizing the complexities of sociopath relationships, the reader “Andrea19” suggests a nuanced way of looking at our experiences with sociopaths. Yes, her ex-husband is manipulative and deceptive, she writes, but she acknowledges that she has her own mental health issues that contributed to the dysfunctional relationship. The Lovefraud reader “Lanie19” takes a different view. In her article, I lived among sociopathic monsters all of my life, she comes out and says, “They are all monsters.” …

3 vital concepts about sociopaths that are key to our survivalRead More

At first, narcissists are charming and attentive, but eventually they turn cold and cruel. Many people are totally baffled by the behavior, and come to suspect they’re dealing with a narcissist. They turn to the Internet and ask variations of the question, what do narcissists want? Here are 20 of those questions — with the answers. 1 . What do narcissists want? Narcissists want what is called "narcissistic supply." In her Lovefraud webinar called, Understanding and Recognizing Narcissistic Abuse, Tiffany Kettermann, LPC, CADCI, explains that narcissistic supply is, "Anything or anyone that feeds the narcissistic person's ego and keeps the person artificially pumped up, protecting their …

What do narcissists want?Read More