How to recognize and recover from everyday sociopaths - narcissists

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Why am I not trusting the love of my life? Part 2 of 4

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Editor's note: Part 2 of a series submitted by a Lovefraud reader whom we'll call "Laura-Marie." Read Part 1. Names have been changed.  Hewas calling and texting a lot all day long. He said he was dealing with brokers to close these deals and some of them were overseas, so he had to be available, especially when the Asian markets opened. He did a lot of the work in front of me with his laptop open as we sat on the couch and watched TV. He used Skype to speak to people. The email. It changed my life. “Hi Sexy. I miss you gorgeous. I love you!” Her name was the same as his name. Charlie Lipton. I asked who she was and he said she was some girl he dated three or four times. I asked w …

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Why am I not trusting the love of my life? Part 1 of 4

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 Editor's note: A Lovefraud reader whom we'll call "Laura-Marie" submitted the following story. Names have been changed. Smooth, smart, sexy. Everything a woman could want. Or so I thought. Why? Why did this happen? What did I do to deserve it? I wish I could wake up from this nightmare. It won't go away. The flashbacks, the words, the feelings. Over and over and over and over in my head. Make it go away. I can't. I try. I pray. And I cry. Each night when I lay my head down, I wish I could fall asleep and not wake up. There had to be someone out there for me. I wasn't meeting any quality men in person, so reluctantly, I placed a dating profile online on Plenty of Fish. And he …

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Watching the Sociopath Self-Destruct

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by Quinn Pierce  The Perpetual Victim I don't know how he does it.  It's a skill he continues to practice and perfect, I suppose. What's astonishing is his ability to twist any situation- no matter how absurd- into something where he can paint himself as the victim. Anyone who was even remotely involved in our lives last year would know that my ex-husband reached a new level of vindictive, hurtful behavior.  He manipulated every resource he could access including doctors, courts, school systems, and child services in two states.  It was such a forceful and constant barrage of attacks that I didn't even have time to collect my thoughts before responding. And that was his goal all alo …

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Sociopaths and Christmas

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In your dreams and desires, Christmas is a wonderful time of the year. You spend time with family and friends. You give and receive thoughtful gifts. If you are religious, you renew your faith. Christmas is supposed to be special. Of course, it doesn't always work out that way, but at least that's your goal. So how do sociopaths view Christmas? In my opinion, sociopaths view Christmas simply as another tool in their manipulation toolbox. They know that Christmas is important to their targets that would be you so they figure out how to use Christmas to advance their agendas. So, if sociopaths are in the love bombing stage, they may shower you with gifts and create unbelievably …

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I knew immediately something was wrong, but I felt trapped

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Editor's Note:  This SPATH Tale was submitted by the Lovefraud reader who posts under the name "sunshinejan." The names in this story have been changed. I married someone I met online after a relatively short courtship that I and friends/family felt was sufficient to answer our questions and made us feel secure as conservative evangelical Christians about his intentions and character. Once I was married and moved out of the country away from my family and gave up my beloved profession and friends to be with him, I knew immediately something was wrong, but I felt trapped. He abused my credit in two countries and lied before and during the marriage about his financial situation. He …

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He makes me believe the lies and sucks me into the drama

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Editor's Note: This SPATH Tale was submitted by the Lovefraud reader who posts by the name "stronginthecity." I am currently in a relationship with a sociopath. I've been with him since June 2013. I was with him before. That relationship ended in 2006, leaving me jobless and depressed because he left the relationship abruptly and literally disappeared. I am a medical professional, so I am the typical target I guess. He resurfaced last year proclaiming his love for me and how much he missed me -- giving three or four reasons, explanations why he left. I kept tabs on him through the years from time to time and found out he was in prison in 2009 for drug charges. He is a constant liar …

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Sarah Strudwick Presents: ‘Dark Souls’ – The Aftermath Talk

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Editor's note: Sarah Strudwick, based in the UK, is author of Dark Souls—Healing and recovering from toxic relationships. She has also created a wonderful animation that describes the antics of a sociopath, called Exposing the Mask of Insanity. Sarah Strudwick Presents: 'Dark Souls' — The Aftermath Talk LONDON Saturday 31st January 2015 12.30-2.30 A good way of describing the relationship with a sociopath is to liken it to a Tsunami. Sometimes you are lucky enough to come out of it unscathed but for many you are left with an aftermath  which can take days, months or even years to clean up. Five years ago Sarah Strudwick decided to write Dark Souls fresh out of her  relationship with a s …

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What if lying for sex were illegal?

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A couple of weeks ago, New Jersey Assemblyman Troy Singleton introduced a bill to expand the definition of sexual assault to include "rape by fraud." This is defined as: "An act of sexual penetration to which a person has given consent because the actor has misrepresented the purpose of the act or has represented he is someone he is not." Singleton is the Assemblyman for Burlington County, New Jersey, and one of his constituents is Mischele Lewis, who was seduced and defrauded by William Jordan. When Singleton read about what happened to Mischele, he reached out to her and offered to write a law to protect future victims. Now, the story about the bill has hit the media. …

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The sociopath left me to go back to his wife 5 times over the past 14 years

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Editor's Note:  This SPATH Tale was submitted by the Lovefraud reader whom we'll call "Tilly Marie." I've been involved with a sociopath for over 14 years. We met at work and fell in love. At least I did. We were both married to other people at the time, and there has been a merry dance led between myself and his wife ever since -- he leaves her, sets up home with me, kicks me out, there's a dramatic showdown, then he ignores me for weeks or months. This has happened five times in 14 years -- that last time being a few weeks ago. I could never fully understand the reasons why he did this, to me or to her. He's painted me as crazy to her and her as crazy to me. Wash. Rinse. …

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I still can’t believe he convinced me to stay

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Editor's Note: This Spath Tale was submitted by the Lovefraud reader whom we'll call "Peggy-Elizabeth." I met him in 1997 and eloped in 1998. Even though that little voice inside told me not to, I still married him. I found that I took my vows more seriously than he EVER did. He's cheated on me since day one. He's lied, cheated, stolen money, forged checks, pawned all of MY belongings, used my credit cards, gave my clothes to girlfriends and only he knows what else. Obviously, I didn't know all this then but I had my suspicions, yet when I began distancing myself again, the story of him being a victim of child molestation emerged. This caused a major rift in his family, and now being …

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