2011 | Page 10 of 23 | Lovefraud | Escape sociopaths

Letters to Lovefraud: Attempting to understand what happened

September 4, 2011 // by Lovefraud Reader// 176 Comments

Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following email from a reader who posts as Whirlwind71. I have just finished reading Love Fraud just mere moments ago, and up until now, I really hadn't been interested in books at all. Previous to this, I read Mary Jo Buttafuoco, Getting It Through My Thick Skull as well as Snakes in Suits and Pathology of a Psychopath (a hard read) ”¦ all in an attempt to understand what the heck happened to me and my family when a guy (whom I described as the most amazing man I have ever met) came into my life ”¦ I now realize that the word "amazing" has many different levels! Once married to my kids' father, I was now a divorced ”¦ or shall I say a HAPPILY divor …

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Psychopaths in the corner suite

September 3, 2011 // by Donna Andersen// 53 Comments

According to research by Dr. Paul Babiak and Dr. Robert Hare, one in 25 business leaders may be a psychopath. Their research will be presented in a BBC Horizon documentary called Are you good or evil?, Wednesday, September 7, at 9 p.m. Read One in 25 business leaders may be a psychopath, study finds, on Guardian.co.uk. Story suggested by a Lovefraud reader. …

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Today I told a lie, because the truth was too unbelievable

September 2, 2011 // by Donna Andersen// 208 Comments

By Joyce Alexander, RNP (Retired) I don't have much use for people who lie ”¦ but sometimes I have resorted to it myself, and today was one of those days. You know, sometimes psychopaths are sort of like a sexually transmitted disease, they are the “love that keeps on giving in a negative way,” it seems, forever. What brought me to telling a lie, because it was just more believable than the truth, was a convoluted story about the “Trojan Horse Psychopath” who infiltrated my family. This man is a three-time convicted child molester who had been a former cell mate and friend to my son, Patrick Alexander, who is in prison in Texas for murder. My son had sent him to infiltrate our family …

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Reaching Out And Healing

August 30, 2011 // by Mel Carnegie// 128 Comments

Today I would like to reach out to everyone here on this site. I have been deeply touched by your comments and on-going conversations, and I feel so much of the pain and confusion that many of you are still experiencing. Your stories resonate so strongly with me on numerous levels — because I've been there too. I know how it feels. I ache for each and every one of you who is currently going through the heartbreak and insanity. And I'm here to tell you, today, that it WILL get better. You WILL come through — particularly with the help and support of sites like this — and there WILL come a time when you can look back at where you are now, recognize all you have achieved and give yourself a huge …

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Letter from a sociopath

August 29, 2011 // by Donna Andersen// 220 Comments

From time to time, Lovefraud receives email from people who identify themselves as sociopaths. Here's one that came in recently: I have read your website, and i am not impressed. You give the impression that all sociopaths are murderers and haters, incapable of loving, and should be thrown away as a tragedy to the human race. You do not mention the difference between a high-functioning sociopath and a low-functioning sociopath. I happen to be a high-functioning sociopath, and your website is all lies and misguided information, and whats worse, you gain money out of creating a stigma of us, and abusing the victims of certain relationships, which although do happen, aren't generally what high …

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It Must Be Me…

August 23, 2011 // by Mel Carnegie// 27 Comments

Thank you so much for all the kind comments following my last post”¦ I'm glad that people are able to connect with what I am saying. It brings me great joy to feel part of this community — thank you for welcoming me so warmly. This week I have decided to write about something that I've been discussing over the past couple of days with my great friend Beatrix, who was also married to a charming sociopath. She is, of course, part of the sister and brotherhood who've been there seen it and got the T-shirt. We've known each other for many years, and our conversations, quite naturally, often focus on our experiences and subsequent education about personality disorders. So last night we were dis …

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Hastening the demise of sociopaths

August 22, 2011 // by Donna Andersen// 250 Comments

Millions of sociopaths roam the planet. They inhabit all segments of the population. They are male, female, rich, poor, old, young, all races, all religions, all education levels, all demographic groups. Most of them are not in prison, so they move freely among us, living their lives by exploiting others. Many take pride in their ability to manipulate others. Some who are criminals view crime as fun. They see nothing wrong with their behavior. As long as they keep succeeding, sociopaths will continue to behave the way they do. So how do we make them fail? Sociopaths only want to win, so failure is losing. Failure is not being able to exploit others, or at least not being able to get …

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Actions speak louder than words… or do they?

August 18, 2011 // by Liane Leedom, M.D.// 114 Comments

This week two people contacted me, both adult daughters of sociopaths. In one case her father and in the other case her mother has psychopathic personality traits. Interestingly, both disordered parents claim to be “Christian” and the theme of our discussions was the disparity between what the parent says and what they do. Both women shared the belief that this disconnect between words and action is particularly damaging to children. I agree with this assertion because I have also seen it in other cases. Why would the disconnect between words and actions be so damaging to children? Consciousness develops gradually during childhood. Consciousness means connecting words, thoughts and fee …

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LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: Recovering from the Internet predator

August 18, 2011 // by Lovefraud Reader// 4 Comments

Editor's note: Lovefraud recently received the following update from a reader who we called “Greta.” Hi Donna: I previously emailed you my story and you posted it on June 23, 2011 under Letters to Lovefraud: Hooked by an Internet predator. This is an update to my story. As I wrote to you last, according to his previous girlfriend in Italy that keeps in touch with me, my ex, the predator, had persuaded a church in Florida to buy him a bus ticket to New York City. The homeless shelter in New York City assisted him through Immigration to get a ticket back to Holland. After the FBI, CIA, and Interpol completed their investigations, Immigration issued him an airline ticket back to Ams …

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To The Sociopath – A Message Of Defiance

August 16, 2011 // by Mel Carnegie// 66 Comments

There are so many inspiring posts and true stories that are shared here on this forum, and I thought I'd like to share with you an open message that I sent to my ex when I discovered he had been reading my blog. For me, it was another of those defining moments. I had a choice, you see. My habitual response would have been to shut down, keep quiet and stop sharing my journey with the world. The knowledge that he once again had access to my inner thoughts instantly brought back the familiar feelings of fear and uncertainty — together with the still haunting shame that I'd fallen so heavily for his poisonous charms. The fact that, despite my love, he had systematically stripped me of everything …

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recovery46 on LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: He assured me he would never, could never hurt me like that again: “Bernice—it’s 2025 and my experience with the spath was EXACTLY the same! I kept rereading bc all the details were…”
sept4 on LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: Letting go of monetary justice is releasing the ties that bind: “This is what I actually struggle with most now that I am a decade out of divorce. I did not…”
Donna Andersen on 10 Crucial strategies for leaving the sociopath: “Good point! Thank you”
sept4 on 10 Crucial strategies for leaving the sociopath: “All very true and very good advice. I would like to add that too can always call police if you…”
eleanoreliza1234 on When bad behavior shows symptoms, not flaws : “What a beautifully composed response by Emilie 18! Reassuring to know that others have experienced the same. Thank you, Emilie.”