Archive for January, 2018

Once I was groomed to be compliant; now I’m reclaiming my own life

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By Eleanor Cowan

I picked up my sweet, chubby grandson and cuddled him in my arms. He’d reached up to me and, thrilled to respond, I held him close. But ah, a colorful object on the floor beckoned, and instantly, he wanted down. Wriggling only once and issuing a single sound, he found himself back on the wool carpet crawling towards a plastic lamb-shaped cookie cutter. It claimed his full attention. With no hesitation, he’d signaled his wish and I honored it. Simple as that.

Not so in my childhood.

Responses to me were, “What do you want now?,” “Go away,” “Get lost,” or, “What a pain in the behind.”

So today, to say no when I mean … Read more

Posted in: Eleanor Cowan

Bruce McArthur of Toronto charged with killing five gay men; police search for more victims

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Bruce McArthur (Facebook)

Toronto police had the apartment of Bruce McArthur under surveillance — he was suspected in the disappearance of several gay men. When they saw a male date arrive, they feared for the man’s safety and broke down the door. The man was found tied to a bed, shaken but unharmed.

At least five other men weren’t so lucky. McArthur, 66, a landscaper, has been charged with five counts of murder. Police found the dismembered skeletal remains of three men in large planters behind a home where McArthur stored landscaping equipment.

Police warn that they may find more victims. McArthur is being compared to American serial killers Jeffrey Dahmer and John Wayne Gacy.

How many did … Read more

Posted in: Media sociopaths, Sociopaths as predators

Self-Love and Healing Journey Day 21: TUNE IN

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Welcome to SLV101, the top radio station of the year! Interested in tuning in? Watch the session to learn how to catch the frequency for your Self LoVe One-Oh-One station. Once you are tuned in, you will probably be tempted to stay tuned, simply because it feels Oh so good!

Do you remember a time when you would wake up, look yourself in the mirror and say “good morning beautiful”? I know it sounds strange, but it feels Good, why do you care how well it sounds? Start giving yourself compliments because it is an … Read more

Posted in: Recovery from a sociopath, Ruzanna Dinger

Self-Love and Healing Journey Day 20: SHIFT

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Répondez, s’il vous plait. “Please reply”, goes the French phrase. I personally love receiving invitations and sending RSVPs, however, when somebody invites me to drama, there is no way I will RSVP! I am now inviting you to share this perspective and think before you sacrifice your class to get even with someone who has none. If you choose to call it “returning a favour” because the word “revenge” sounds so mean, I am afraid the outcome will be no different.

You have probably heard them say, before you go on a journey of revenge, … Read more

Posted in: Recovery from a sociopath, Ruzanna Dinger

Romance scam: Woman steals $42,000 to send to a man she met online

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Loke Pui Ling, a 44-year-old woman from Singapore, was sentenced to 16 months in jail for misappropriating more than $42,000 from her employer. She sent the money to Nigeria, believing that she was helping the man she met online and fell in love with.

And that’s just the beginning of the story.

Loke also agreed to “help” another man she met online by accepting $62,000 into her bank account. The money appeared to be part of $71,000 taken from another woman, so Loke was essentially engaged in money laundering.

Love scam victim who misappropriated over $42k from employer jailed for 16 months, on StraitsTimes.com.

Here’s the lesson: Do not send money to, or accept money from, people you … Read more

Posted in: Sociopaths and money

Self-Love and Healing Journey Day 19: GIVE

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Let’s take a fresh new look at the word Message together. It seems to be made of two words – mess and age. I am sure you all know what mess is all about, we felt it through all of our five senses – we saw it, we heard it, we touched it, some of us smelled and tasted it. Using our sixth sense now, the voice of intuition, which is or our extrasensory perception, we are able to turn that mess into a mess-age.

We age physiologically when we grow old, but we age … Read more

Posted in: Recovery from a sociopath, Ruzanna Dinger

How disordered motivation explains psychopathic behavior

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Why do they do it? If you’ve ever tangled with a psychopath, you’ve certainly asked yourself that question. Why do psychopaths engage in harmful and destructive behavior?

Most psychopathy researchers explain the nasty behavior of these disordered individuals in terms of deficits. They say that because psychopaths lack empathy and impulse control, they engage in antisocial behavior.

To Lovefraud author Dr. Liane Leedom, this makes no sense — it implies that if it weren’t for empathy and impulse control, everybody would be a psychopath. Deficits don’t cause behavior, she says. Motivation causes behavior.

In a chapter that she recently wrote for the book Psychopathy – New Updates on and Old Phenomenon, Dr. Leedom argues that human … Read more

Posted in: Donna Andersen, Explaining the sociopath, Liane Leedom, M.D.

Self-Love and Healing Journey Day 18: ACT

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Acting when you are traumatised sounds like an arduous task, but it takes a special person like you to act on your life, so that it doesn’t act on you instead (again!). During this self-love and healing practice acting is about starting to take charge of your life in every way. Following the principles learned from the past 17 days of practice, once you put yourself first and start your day with yourself first, you will very much look forward to your morning 25-minute power routine suggested in this practice.

Many of you have … Read more

Posted in: Recovery from a sociopath, Ruzanna Dinger

Mary Ann Glynn, LCSW, to offer free online support group Feb. 4th at 5 pm EST.

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Experience the support of people who know! Join our free online video support group Sunday, February , 2018 at 5 pm EST. Go to www.destructiverelationshipshelp.com and use the Contact Form at the bottom of the home page to state your interest in joining. Do this every time even if you have joined us before! PLEASE Include your Skype user name (or phone number if you cannot open a Skype account) so you can be added to the group call.

Share your struggles, questions, get feedback and clarity from people who get it! Hope to see you there!… Read more

Posted in: Uncategorized

To Mom and Dad: 9 reasons why your son or daughter fell for the sociopath

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Dear Parents of a Lovefraud Target,

Your son or daughter has now come to the brutal realization that the entire relationship was a scam.

Perhaps you’ve had your suspicions for a while. Perhaps you’ve even tried to tell your kid that the partner was no good, but he or she wouldn’t listen to you.

Now everything has collapsed, and you can’t understand why your son or daughter didn’t see it coming.

Please understand that sociopaths are professional con artists, and they are really, really good at what they do. In fact, they spend their entire lives perfecting their craft.

Following are nine reasons why your son or daughter fell for it.

1. Your son or daughter didn’t know … Read more

Posted in: Donna Andersen, Explaining the sociopath