Letters to Lovefraud and Spath Tales

Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following email from a reader whom we'll call "Trevor18." I came across your work after I spent about two months in the craziest relationship I've ever experienced. The relationship and how it abruptly ended left me feeling confused and then I was compelled to seek answers. I just didn't know what to do. Then I stumbled upon Cluster B personality disorders and eventually I found your list of 10 signs of dating a sociopath. 1: Charisma/Charm I first met this girl at her daughter's birthday party in May of 2017. After a brief introduction, she approached me frequently during the party and it felt extremely easy to talk to her. She seemed to be …

How one guy’s recent girlfriends meets all of the 10 Red Flags of Love FraudRead More

Editor's note: Following is a series of letters sent by a Lovefraud reader, whom we'll call "Grace18." Other names are also changed. Read Part 1, Part 2, Part 3 and Part 4. As a woman, having been involved on the sidelines with women of many age groups for decades, who were victims of abuse, I found that the one group, constantly being forgotten was the "older" generation. So many of these women, were the mothers....the grandmothers....the aunts, who carried the work load and the child-rearing in dignity, while holding onto their secrets. Because I had such a variety of friends covering ages above me and coming up behind me, the stories existed with that silence. There were no terms …

My heart breaks for my three beautiful daughters who are no longer part of my life – Part 4Read More

Editor's note: Following is Part 3 of a series of letters sent by a Lovefraud reader, whom we'll call "Grace18." Other names are also changed. Read Part 1, Part 2, Part 3 and Part 4. Maybe my story will help a mother....a daughter.....a sister. I have become a parking lot preacher, when young people take out my grocery cart. Holding onto them for five min. or so and asking them if they are going onto college.....what they are studying...if they plan on leaving this small "no hope" county? I talk to myself w/in all day long....then, when I can no longer bear the silence, I try to write to my oldest, Juliann, on a msg....or my youngest on email. I never hear from Juliann of course....and …

My heart breaks for my three beautiful daughters who are no longer part of my life – Part 3Read More

Editor's note: Following is a series of letters sent by a Lovefraud reader, whom we'll call "Grace18." Other names are also changed. Read Part 1, Part 2, Part 3 and Part 4. My daughters Juliann 43/Catherine 42/Sandra 36......2 already divorced....1 remarried.....3 grandsons with each daughter passing on the "hate"....... My children and I went through some very hard lean years, as I moved us for better jobs...and to hopefully put them in a place where they could obtain scholarships through a particular high school. My oldest child, Juliann, won a scholarship in the area, based on a letter that I wrote explaining just why she should be so blessed. My second daughter, in the same …

My heart breaks for my three beautiful daughters who are no longer part of my life – Part 2Read More

Red flags: he love bombed me and rush me into moving to his state. Sold my home and rental properties. Red Flag: shortly after getting married he quit his job and worked P/T living off interest earning from the owner finance sale of his home. AND his mother was constantly buying him things and giving him money. (RED FLAG?) Two years married and an affair with younger girl. He begged forgiveness and said he doesn't know what wrong with him. He admitted to using Meth and had been doing so in a low dose each day in order to function. I took him to holistic doctor, as he didn't want any counseling. He withdrew — bed and couch ridden for almost 4 weeks. RED FLAG: he was miraculously c …

Married 10 years only to find out he has a personality disorderRead More

Editor's note: The following was posted in the Lovefraud Forum by the reader "freedomformydaughter." This article is so poignant and insightful I wanted everyone to see it. when your daughter is in a relationship with a psychopath* you cannot speak sense to her if you try she will walk out so you go years without being able to talk deeply to her when your daughter is in a relationship with a psychopath she will drop her family values, her morals, her modesty, her purity she will find her value in her use to him as a sexual object she will forget that she is beautiful inside she will forget that she has qualities that make her rare and unique she will forget that she has strengths …

When your daughter is in a relationship with a psychopathRead More

Editor's note: A young reader has contacted Lovefraud on several occasions. She has realized that her father is disordered, which set her up to meet several disordered boyfriends. I used one of her letters in a video — you can see it here: "How do I avoid dating a sociopath like my father?" This reader writes: I took your advice and stopped dealing with my father because he always has ill intentions. I’m not sure if you recall the last time I spoke with him and saw him was over the summer of 2017. I will reiterate the story. He snapped his Achilles’ tendon trying to show off while climbing a mountain and I became the blame. He compared me to several women on the mountain, stating …

Lovefraud reader writes: ‘I hate holidays with a narcissist’Read More

Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following letter from a reader whom we'll call, "Trisha17." My uncle (mother’s side) is a sociopath. I’ve known since my first memory of him as a child, I just saw it in his mannerisms, heard it in his voice, saw it in his lack of genuine care for others. I just instinctually knew. I have always found him to be totally fake. My father is a highly intelligent and relatively benign grandiose narcissist. I have narcissistic traits but am definitely an empath. I have clued in to sociopaths and have been taken aback that no one else sees it. I remember when my grandma was having a serious surgery he went to get a haircut while she was under the kni …

My uncle is a sociopath — how do I protect our family?Read More