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Archive for July, 2017

10 facts about your romance with a sociopath that you must believe, even though you don’t want to

Couple making heartYou’re shattered. You thought you finally met your soul mate, the person you were waiting for all your life. This charming, charismatic and attentive romantic partner swept you off your feet in a whirlwind romance. It was good — no, it was fabulous — until it wasn’t.

Perhaps you were subjected to the “devalue and discard” routine. Or you discovered that your partner wasn’t the person he or she claimed to be. However it happened, you are heartbroken.

Mary Ann Glynn, LCSW, offers free online video/voice support group Sunday Sept 10th 5 pm EST.

Mary Ann Glynn

Join our free online video/voice chat (your choice) Sunday, Sept. 10, 2017 at 5 pm EDT (to accommodate European time) at www.destructiverelationshipshelp.com. To join, send your Skype user name of phone number ahead of time (using the Contact Form at the bottom of the Home page) so you can be added to the group call.

Experience the support of people who know!  Share your struggles and get feedback, support, and hope from others who get it.  Hope to see you there!

Posted in: Uncategorized

I am trying to remember who I was before he decimated me

Spath TalesEditor’s note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader who posts as “msescue.”

I was married to a narcissist for 10 years and we had one daughter together. He was 4 years younger than me, had never been married and was a cute nervous wreck when we went out. It made me feel beautiful and empowered that at nearly 30 years old, I was able to attract a younger man who was NERVOUS to meet me.

A sociopath’s capacity for deception and betrayal is almost unfathomable

Husband Liar Sociopath

Every week, a chapter of my book, “Husband, Liar, Sociopath: How He Lied, Why I Fell For It & The Painful Lessons Learned” (available via Amazon.com, just click on the title or book cover) will be published here on Lovefraud. To read prior chapters, please see the links at the bottom of the post.

Chapter 50A: Oh My GOD! 

On my lawyer’s advice, I called all the locksmiths in the area, and they agreed to refuse Paul entry to the house without my consent. Fortunately, the threat of me moving out with the kids and incurring the rent of an additional apartment big enough for two kids, two dogs, and me had worked. Paul never moved back into the house.

Never Good Enough (My childhood adaptation to abuse)

By Eleanor Cowan

I was eleven years old.  “Do you know what you are? asked Mother, thrusting open my bedroom door to find me, as she knew she would, in a predictable spot reading a predictable book. “I’ll tell you who. You’re a big, fat, lazy nothing.” Waving her souvenir from Mexico, a horsewhip, she flicked my hair up at the back as I hit the stairs to begin new tasks.

Even though I weighed less than a hundred pounds, even though my chores were done and I’d earned the right to read for awhile, I did not defend myself.  There was no talking back, no disrespect, no arguing. Only one rehearsed sentence was permitted. I said it: “Yes, mother? What can I do to help?”

Posted in: Eleanor Cowan

What you need to know to get a restraining order against a sociopath

Lovefraud Continuing Education webinar
Obtaining Injunctions Against a Sociopath
Presented by Megan Lyons, Esq.
Tuesday, Aug. 1, 8-9 p.m. ET • $25
More info

Sometimes sociopaths will not leave you alone. The involvement is over and you want to move on, but the sociopath is stalking you. Or, you can’t totally escape the person — perhaps you have children together — and the sociopath uses every communication and exchange as an opportunity to harass you.


What sociopaths want from sex

Image courtesy of alexisdc at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Many, many people who were romantically involved with sociopaths have told me that the sex was amazing. Earth-moving. The best they ever had. At least, that’s how it was in the beginning, while the sociopath was still reeling them in.

The targets thought this amazing sex was proof of the real connection between themselves and the sociopath, proof that the two of them were wildly, deeply in love.

The truth is that sociopaths are incapable of love. Oh, they’re capable of feeling attraction. And they’re capable of proclaiming love, very convincingly (especially when they’re looking for sex). But they are not capable of genuine concern for another person’s welfare, which is a key component of real love.

New Zealand woman steals $170,000 from her mother — and loses half to love fraud

Image courtesy of Ohmega1982 at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Irakau Ada Pehi, 60, who lives in Taranaki, New Zealand, was supposed to manage her 86-year-old mother’s finances. Instead of paying expenses according to her mother’s wishes, the woman stole $170,000.

Of that money, Pehi made for bank transfers, totaling $81,000, to an overseas bank. It turned out to be a Nigerian love scam.

Pehi pleaded guilty and was sentenced to a year of home detention and 200 hours of community service.

Fraudster loses half of $170k she stole in Nigerian love scam, on stuff.co.nz.

 

 

One trait or behavior does not make a sociopath – look for a pattern of traits and behaviors

sexy man and womanI once heard from a man, whom we’ll call “Jeff,” who wanted to know if the woman he was involved with, “Amanda,” was a sociopath.

It started as a friendly involvement, with Jeff trying to help Amanda out. Amanda, who was from a foreign country, called Jeff her “best friend.” Jeff eventually started to have feelings for her. But then came a series of unsettling experiences:

  • Amanda made pornographic videos, which were posted on the Internet.
  • Amanda worked as an escort. Jeff offered to pay her rent, so she wouldn’t have to be an escort, and Amanda agreed—and continued being an escort anyway.

The sociopath’s “discard” is soul destroying — you learn your “soul mate” is pure fabrication designed to con, exploit, and hurt

Husband Liar SociopathEvery week, a chapter of my book, “Husband, Liar, Sociopath: How He Lied, Why I Fell For It & The Painful Lessons Learned” (available via Amazon.com, just click on the title or book cover) will be published here on Lovefraud. To read prior chapters, please see the links at the bottom of the post.

Chapter 49B:  Clarity And Its Consequences

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